


The Last Man on the World Heard a Knock on the Door

by kiwisandwich (panconkiwi)



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Post-Apocalypse, Comedy, Grief/Mourning, M/M, Minor Character Death (it's the entire world), Minor Spoilers from The Stolen Century, Not Suicidal Characters Per Se But There's A Lot Of Talk About Voluntarily Ending Your Life, Romantic Comedy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-12
Updated: 2017-12-18
Packaged: 2019-01-16 14:39:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 57,348
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12344664
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/panconkiwi/pseuds/kiwisandwich
Summary: "The last man on Earth sat alone in a room. There was a knock on the door."As the Grim Reaper, Kravitz was certain his work would be done with the end of the world and life as we know it. Unfortunately, Taako survived, and he's not dying just yet.





	1. The World

**Author's Note:**

> Pretty much what it says on the tags. I'm not gonna lie kids its gonna get sad at some point but I'm mostly writing this for the self-indulgent romance. The rating is subject to change because I do want this to end in sexy stuff but it depends on whether or not the story helps me out and also I am a fucking wimp.
> 
> My beautiful beta hasn't listened to TAZ yet and I don't want to spoil her so this is going to be a mess. Do scold me for my English and apologies for my cockney accent, which is even worse than Kravitz's.

The day after the world ended, Kravitz went for a walk.

There wasn’t much to sightsee anymore; beautiful forests had turned to ashes, snowy mountains were now rivers of lava. It was still beautiful in a tragic way, not that Kravitz didn’t appreciate it. But that day, Kravitz had work to do.

A lot of work. All of it.

So he went for a walk that lasted four months.

Reaping souls wasn’t a hard job most of the time, he just had to make sure they found their way to the other side. The good thing about the end of the world was that all the events prior to the Big End itself warmed it up, so most souls had already come to terms with the fact that life was over. And the ones that didn’t, well, one look at the aftermath was enough to convince most of them. And it wasn’t to say that Kravitz hadn’t encountered any trouble on the way; rogue souls were everywhere, that was mostly why he had to walk at all. They ran away from him —or at least tried to; he could track anyone once they died. Besides, most rogue souls were harmless, he only had to resort to violence couple hundred times. It was a bit of a pain in the ass, but he didn’t care at this point.

“I, Ranceforth the Cunning, REFUSE to be taken! There is nothing anyone can do to stop my world domination pl-!!”

Kravitz took the lich down with one swift move of his scythe. “Whatever you say, champ.”

And, honestly? He couldn’t wait to drop the accent.

A rift opened in the air and sucked the remains of the lich’s soul; Kravitz approached it to step inside but he was cut by a crow flying from it. The bird perched itself on a calcified branch next to him and cawed.

“I know. I’m trying to keep on schedule but these people keep getting smarter.”

Another caw.

“There’s still a handful of them around, I believe I can close it up by Wednesday. Will that do?”

And this time the crow just nodded, taking off from the branch and returning to the rift into the astral plane. Kravitz followed suit, but the other side was empty when he stepped in.

He did finish on monday, with just enough time left for a last walk around the remains of the planet. What a wonderful thing it was, the end of the world. They had been working on it for over a century and the final result was a complete success. All life successfully eradicated, even plants, even bacteria, even things that weren’t supposed to die. Too many lives to count, if they counted, but at least only the intelligent races put up resistance. Kravitz really didn’t want to deal with some of the latest mutations that had surged in the last decade, the radiation mess.

It really was a job well done, he was so proud. Part of him would miss it.

But not, like, a big fraction. 1%, probably 2%. Yeah that sounded about right.

He had already visited the highest peak, the deepest canyon, how about the beach? There was a little patch of land he hadn’t visited in years, inhabited places and all that, no work to do. He could then go visit the prairie nearby.

With a swipe of his scythe, he opened another portal into the material plane and stepped inside without a second thought, only realizing his mistake when the current swoop him down.

_Oh, right, the sea level._

That was about the most coherent thought he could manage. The rest of his faculties were all preoccupied with the tasks of escaping the current and sailing afloat. Of course Kravitz didn’t need air, but the sensation of water filling his body’s lungs wasn’t a pleasant one. And his suit was probably ruined too. Surface. Now.

But reaching up was getting harder and harder, he couldn’t even open another rift in that state. What if he stayed like that for hours? Even days? What if-

And then, there was a grip on his arm, and he was being pulled upwards.

“-ng on! Can- eer me? -my hand!”

What was that? There was water inside his ears, it was hard to hear in the strong current.

“MY HAND! GRAB IT!”

Oh, that. Yes. Kravitz grabbed back. Suddenly he felt as if his whole body weighted less, and a quick arcana check informed him it was a feather fall spell. The sudden change in density pushed him upwards and enough for the man on the boat to drag him on top of a seat.

Kravitz coughed the excess of water out of his system, which burned his throat on the way out, even if just a second before his physical form patched itself up. Just because he couldn’t die it didn’t mean he was safe from the pain. But he was safe now, all thanks to…

“You were lucky, my dude, I was just this close from ditching this old piece of wood. Guess you never know when a hot castaway is going to show up in front of your cottage, am I right?”

There was an elf on the boat next to Kravitz, smiling with a mix of smug accomplishment and flirtiness. He was rather cute, but that wasn’t the point.

Kravitz felt his corporeal form leave and he stood up so fast it would’ve made any mortal nauseous. “What the _fuck?!_ ”

The smile faded from the elf’s face. “I was expecting a ‘thank you.’”


	2. The Knock

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> edit: i should have never splitted the first two chapters.
> 
> I found this while doing some research for this chapter. Give it a listen! Caw caw! https://academy.allaboutbirds.org/caw-vs-croak-inside-the-calls-of-crows-and-ravens/

“The end?”

“The end.”

“Of the world.”

“Our world, yes.

The elf, Taako, pondered about it for a moment. He stirred his tea, sipped, put it down, added one more spoonful of sugar, stirred again, sipped. “Hm! Well, that adds up.”

“It’s been four months. You seriously didn’t notice?”

“My dude, I haven’t talked to any other creature in years.”

“The animals are gone too, insects, entire forests.”

“Well, mother nature can be unpredictable sometimes.”

“The sky is _bloody_ red!”

“I think it’s more of a pinkish hue- oh, you mean bloody as a curse. Yeah, I gotcha.”

“The sea level has risen over three meters,” Kravitz pointed out the window, where the only thing in miles and miles away was the sea, and Kravitz didn’t have to look from every window in the house to know it stretched out in every direction. “ How did you even keep this cottage afloat?”

“Oh, you know, I just kept rising the level of the land. It’s a waste of spell slots, let me tell you, though I haven’t had to do it for a while. Do you think that part is over? I’d really hate to deal with that shit for the rest of my life.”

Kravitz sighed for the fifth time in the past ten minutes. You’d expect the only survivor of the apocalypse to be a bit more savvy; then again, the fact that Taako was alive and well wasn’t expected at all. “Years of preparation, research, census, all for one of you to slip past our radar. This was supposed to be my last day!” He finally grabbed his own cup of coffee, its warmth heavily contrasting his own lack of body heat, and took a sip. “Do you have any vanilla?”

“Nope.” Taako said.

Kravitz put the cup back on the table. “I can’t even imagine what would’ve happen had I not gone for a last walk.”

“I think this is what they call... called? Destiny.” Taako leaned closer towards Kravitz on the already small couch. Boy, he was really cute. “Crabby, was it?”

“Kravitz, actually.”

“Krav, tell me, what are the odds of the two last people on Faerun finding each other in this bigass dead world? You just told me it was your job to find and collect the souls of the deceased, could you have found me by your own means?”

That was the part that worried him the most: he couldn’t. A simple oversight on his part and he would’ve left Taako behind without even noticing, and what would’ve happened then?

Taako took his hands, the cold of the reaper’s skin startled him a little but Kravitz pretended not to notice. “Listen, it _has_ to mean something.”

Kravitz stared back at him. They were so close right now, he could practically count each freckle on the elf’s face. “Wait, so you really are okay with this?”

“Yeah man, why delay the inevitable?”

“That’s… very considerate of you, thank you!”

“Pfft, I mean, I’m not exactly complaining over here, have you seen yourself in a mirr- where are you going?”

They were still holding hands so when Kravitz stood up he took Taako with him. He was smiling, he felt so relieved. “Outside, of course! I figured the quickest way was to have you jump over a cliff.”

“Of course, that makes- HOLD THE FUCK UP.” Taako let go of their hold. “You want to _kill_ me?!”

Kravitz gasped. “No! No, no, no, no.”

“Good, because for a moment it really seemed like you wanted to _push me off a cliff_.”

“Oh, I could never! Grim Reapers aren’t allowed to take life. You’ll have to jump yourself.”

“HOW IS THAT ANY DIFFERENT?!”

“I know, astral plane bureaucracy is something else. Suicide, euthanasia, if there’s consent why should it matter? But trust me, it is the quickest, less painful death we can get you right now. There aren’t any plants around to poison you, and trust me, you don’t want to endure the few seconds it takes lava to-”

“DUDE,” Taako grabbed Kravitz by the shoulders and shook him three, four, five times. “I. DON’T. WANT. TO. DIE.”

Kravitz frowned. “I thought you were okay with this?”

“I didn’t mean- Ugh.” Taako let go in the most dramatic way he could, dropping back into the couch. “My point is, I’m not dying yet, I just survived the apocalypse!”

“But… but you have to die! You are the only soul left in the world. Why do you even want to stay?”

Taako crossed his arms and pouted. “I’m an elf, I still have a shit ton of life ahead and you don’t get to take it away from me.”

Kravitz was astonished. He laughed. He was actually laughing even though he found the situation the least funny. “Are you serious? You’d stay in a world full of nothing just because you can still live?”

The elf glared at him and Kravitz glared back. He couldn’t possibly be serious about it, and Kravitz could spend an entire day without blinking. You couldn’t outwit Death.

Taako stuck out his tongue.

“Oh, for crying out loud.” That was it, he wanted to act like a child? Whatever! Kravitz’s face melted into a skull and a scythe materialized out of thin air into his bony hand. “You are a fool, Taako, but you have made your choice. There is no worse fate than that of a soul doomed to wander for all eternity in the material plane.”

Taako sat up, arms still crossed, glare intact. “Suck my dick.”

The fire in Kravitz’s eye sockets increased and for a moment the whole room seemed to turn white with heat. Taako had to close his eyes, and when he opened them again, the reaper was gone.

The last man on the world sat alone in a room. He downed the rest of his tea.

* * *

 

That pretty much ended Kravitz walk. So what if the elf wanted to stay on Faerun? Fine, it was his decision. Kravitz had done everything he was told to, wandered around a dead world for months and now every soul that ever lived was accounted for, even if one was still in some tiny island in the middle of nowhere. As far as he was concerned, Kravitz had earned his retirement.

There was a caw behind him, and Kravitz turned around to see one of the Raven Queen’s crows follow him down the path to the other side. The bird was walking, not flying, and it looked rather cute. But the tone of its cry unsettled him.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t catch that. Come again?”

The crow cawed, but it meant nothing specific. That was normal, sometimes a caw was just a caw. Kravitz walked, the crow followed, there was another caw. Then, the sound of wings flapping alerted him to a second one, which landed next to its fellow and followed suit. In a matter of minutes, Kravitz had a small murder trailing behind him, all of them cawing.

“Do you want something?” He asked exasperatedly, to which all the crows answered in unison. It still meant nothing to him.

He had almost made it to the other side, and then was silence for a brief moment. No little bird steps, no caws, just his own dress shoes hitting the ebony floor. Kravitz paused, and he almost didn’t get to turn around in time to see all of the crows take flight and circle him.

Kravitz covered his face with his arms by force of habit, soon realizing he was no longer in his corporeal form. The crows weren’t attacking him, so what was going on? Was it because he was finally about to pass on? Or maybe…

“Oh, you gotta be shitting me.”

Kravitz run forwards, drawing his scythe and holding it in front of himself. He wasn’t planning on attacking the crows, just scare them away, which worked half the way to the portal. But then, the crows finally made up their minds and went after him, still not attacking, just cawing. Caw, caw, caw, all of them at the same time, and Kravitz finally realized they weren’t spitting bird nonsense. It was just something no one had had to tell him before.

“Your job is not done!”

Fuck it all.

He stepped back, opened a rift in the air and left the astral plane.

Back on Faerun, Kravitz took a minute to cool himself down. He adopted his corporeal form once again, even if there was no one around to see him; the small island in the middle of the ocean where Taako lived (lived, he was alive, _how dared he_ ) was miles away. Then he fished around his pocket for a handful of black feathers, scattered them around himself and kneeled down, establishing a connection with his goddess, the Raven Queen.

Cries and screaming filled his ears while his boss made her voice clear. “ _Kravitz, my wings are a bit full right now. Everything okay down there?_ ”

“My goddess, I have finished guiding the last soul of the dead into the astral plane.”

“ _I’m glad to hear that. Thank you for your hard work these past months. And centuries, you have been a superb reaper. If you so wish, you may bid this world farewell before returning to me._ ”

“It has been an honor, but I’m afraid I can’t seem to leave just yet. There’s been an issue.”

The Raven Queen cooed with interest. “ _Well then, what is it about?_ ”

Kravitz hesitated for a moment, considering the best way to address the matter in question. “There’s a survivor.”

The line fell silent for a second, then three, then five. For a moment, Kravitz feared the wrath of the Raven Queen, ruler of the underworld and now almost every soul that ever lived. What he got instead were the guttural croaks he immediately recognized as a laughing fit.

“ _Oh, Istus! Always pulling shit like that in the last minute, you sly bitch!_ ” There was something almost blasphemous about hearing a goddess talking shit about other deities; Kravitz downed his head in embarrassment as the Raven Queen’s laugh died down. “ _Well, nothing you can do about it._ ”

“I know. The elf has explicitly stated he plans on staying alive as long as his lifespan allows him.”

“ _And that’s… I’m sorry, these numbers are so small to me. Are we talking about a long or short lifespan?_ ”

“The longest among mortals.”

“ _Of course. This has Istus’ name all over it._ ” The goddess laughed some more, but this time with less euphoria. As funny as she found the situation, she was still in the middle of a mass exodus into her realms. “ _I’ll be seeing you in a while then, Kravitz. Do let me know when you’ll be coming home so I can arrange something for your retirement party._ ”

“Wait, hold on. I can’t leave, your crows forbid my passage into the other side.”

“ _Of course, your job is not done yet._ ”

“But I’ve collected every single soul in this world!”

“ _Save for one._ ”

Kravitz sighed. “Save for one. But he doesn’t want to come with me, what else am I supposed to do? Wait? For an _elf’s_ lifetime?”

“ _You’ve been around longer than any other creature in this world._ ”

That… was true. But this was different. Waiting for just one soul to make it to the other side…

“ _Kravitz, my Kravitz, listen to me. I understand your plight, but there’s nothing neither of us can do about it. What if this elf decides to take on a necromancer’s path? What if he turns himself into a lich, roaming forever on this lost world, and you are not there to punish him?_ ”

He hadn’t thought about it. Would Taako do that? He already knew magic, some powerful enough to raise a little cottage above sea level during the apocalypse.

“ _It pains me to put you in this situation, but I wouldn’t ask this from you if I didn’t trust you to carry it through._ ”

But it still wasn’t fair. This was supposed to be the end.

Kravitz didn’t voice his thoughts, though. “And I will, my goddess.”

The connection was cut out and Kravitz stood up. A small breeze blew one of the black feathers off and it circled around him lazily before returning to the ground.

* * *

 

The next day, Kravitz made it back to the cottage in the middle of the sea. He considered his options.

Worst case scenario: Taako died of old age. It was hard determining an elf’s age at first glance, but he was certain that elves reached maturity around their first century, so that was as good a place to start as any. This was assuming he’d have to deal with Taako for a while, writing down 600 or so years of waiting put things into perspective.

On the bright side, the fact that the world was a barren pit of boiling danger reduced the possible causes of death to two likely candidates: a natural disaster, and starvation. While the former seemed like a good bet, Taako did outlive the series of events that eradicated all life from the face of Faerun. But it had been dumb luck, just the fact that all of the major impacts had affected other areas and this one had only seen a rise in the level of water. Kravitz trusted the gods of nature would provide a fortuitous hurricane or tsunami in the future.

About the latest, there was a chance Taako had stacked his house full of groceries at some point, considering he lived in the middle of nowhere and trips to the nearest town would be taxing, especially if he lived alone. But the world had ended four months ago. There were no traces of civilization left and that included grocery stores. He would eventually run out.

And whatever came first, Kravitz would be there to make sure his soul didn’t wander away. It wasn’t much of a plan, but he took comfort in knowing his options.

He still had to deal with Taako until then, though.

On tuesday, Taako had greeted him as if nothing had happened on the day before. “Good morning, Krav-boy! Back for round two?”

Kravitz stood close enough to see the elf but still too far to hear anything that wasn’t a yell. He didn’t answer.

The elf went about his routine during the day while Kravitz watched from afar. The day went by uneventfully.

On wednesday, Taako actually seemed startled. “W-woah, hey! You didn’t move an inch!”

Kravitz didn’t answer.

“Okay, so it’s gonna be like that, huh.”

And the day went by, also uneventfully.

On thursday, the door opened to a mirror. “See, this is how you look, and it’s creeping me the fuck out!”

Kravitz didn’t answer, but he did take the chance to look at himself in the mirror. Hm, his tie was a bit crooked, so he fixed it.

Taako’s body came out from behind the mirror pointing at him. “Aha! You moved!”

And again, Kravitz didn’t answer.

That night, Taako put the mirror back inside, not before saying, “This is some horror movie shit,” which made Kravitz wonder, what the fuck was a movie?

On friday, Taako came out of the house and almost shitted himself. “Yeah yeah good morn-HOLY FUCKING SHIT! Oh, fuck, dude you are the worst!”

Kravitz, whose face had been replaced by a skull, didn’t answer. He would have laughed, however, had he had any facial muscles. He stayed like that until night just in case a laughing fit got him during the day (which they did).

On saturday, Taako approached him.

“What took you so long?,” Kravitz said.

“Oh, so you can talk. What took _you_ so long?”

“You were too far, I don’t like to yell.”

“And you didn’t approach me because I didn’t invite you, like a vampire?”

“No, I just wanted to see how long would it take for you to break.”

The tips of Taako’s ears went red and this time Kravitz allowed himself to smile. You couldn’t outwit Death.

Well then, nothing left to do. Taako snorted and crossed his arms. “So.”

“So,” acknowledged Kravitz.

“What’s the deal here? You gonna try to murder me?”

Kravitz sighed. “I already told you I can’t do that,” even though he kinda wished he could, but the laws of life and death were very specific into that respect. ‘Conveniently timed accidents’ were also amongst the things he couldn’t do.

“Then what, you gonna stay there until I die?”

“That’s pretty much the gist of it, yes.”

“Will you be like one of those guards who can’t move even if I make silly faces in front of you?”

“I can still punch you.”

Taako laughed nervously. “That’s fair.”

And then, Taako began stretching his arms and legs. Kravitz stared at him quizzically before he began jogging along the shoreline. “Alright, see ya.”

Kravitz didn’t follow, only stayed in his corner of the island until Taako passed by again, and again, and again, each time with a different greeting.

“Hey, handsome.”

“Hello, mister Death.”

“What’s up, Fantasy Hot Topic.”

“Yo, Krav. Haha, get it, cuz I’m holding a crab….’s corpse. Actually, ew.” And he dropped the crab.

The island was big enough for there to be a five minute break between those meetings. On the final leap, Taako tried to get Kravitz to high five him, to no avail. “Welp, time to stretch!” He reached for his toes and it just so happened that his back was turned to Kravitz. “As you can see-”

“I don’t,” Kravitz lied.

“-I am in perfect shape,” then Taako sat down on the floor, opened his legs and reached forward. “Motherfuckin’ epitome of health and fitness.”

“Your legs are supposed to be stretched.”

“My point is, I’m not dying anytime soon, so why don’t you drop this silly game of yours, preferably with the accent, and just join me in my dreamy cottage on the beach?”

“I’m perfectly fine here, _luv_.”

Taako lied on his back, staring at the pinkish sky. “I know you meant that as a way to antagonize me but I’m still going to take that pet name as proof that you are warming up to me.”

“Whatever you say, champ.”

“Okay now you are just being condescending.”

“What makes you think that, darlin’?

“STOP.”

And so the day went by.

On Sunday, nothing happened.

Kravitz waited outside as time passed, but the sun was about to set and Taako hadn’t even opened a window all day. He just stayed inside.

Maybe it was the day? People used to sleep in on sundays. Although he wasn’t sure if elves even slept. He tried for a lore check but the answer barely escaped him.

The last of daylight was about to end, and Kravitz took the impulse decision to explore the tiny island a bit more. At least it was something to do.

There was a good four hundred feet distance between each side of the house and the shore, giving the place a lot of space to walk, if nothing else. It would have been paradisiac had it not been for the emptiness, or the pinkish red sky, and maybe if there had been a seagull or two.

The weather was nice enough for a bath, Kravitz thought. Warm enough to be inviting but not too much to suffocate. Not that he would actually go swimming after his last experience with water, thank you very much.

And then there was the house itself. Big, probably enough to house a family of four, it felt massive with only one resident. Didn’t Taako feel alone inside? Maybe he could use that to break his spirit.

A closer inspection of the building made him realize one of the walls, the one that was directly against sunlight now, was made of a different material than the rest. It felt too smooth, was it glass? Some of the structure blended into the other two adjacent walls, which were actually made up of two sections, one smooth and short (probably no more than ten feet wide) and the rest was rougher, like wood. It was all painted in the same tone of dark green, which helped with the homogenization.

Weird.

“Whatcha lookin’ at”

Kravitz jumped at Taako’s voice, who had positioned himself right behind him and was now laughing his ass off.

“Holy fuck dude, chill, it’s just me.”

“Actually, mate, I can’t “chill” yet. Turns out I’ll be at work for the next half a millennium because of some bloody elf who doesn’t want to die.”

“Okay, sorry, I can’t take you seriously. What’s with the accent? Is it, like, part of the job? A character trait?”

Kravitz put his best poker face. “Yes.”

And Taako was back to laughing. It made Kravitz feel smug.

“Oh, man, it’s gonna be a fun millennium indeed. Nice of you to come, by the way. Sorry I forgot to tell you Sundays are Taako time, it takes a whole day to complete my beauty rituals.”

“Oh! Yeah, of course, I get it…”

He paused when he saw the way Taako was smiling at him. “You _did_ worry.”

Kravitz immediately felt his face go warm. “I was hoping you were dead!”

“Funny, by your tone one would think you were more relieved than disappointed, but if you say so, _darlin’._ ”

“Don’t you darlin’ me, _luv_.”

Taako laughed, and, to his surprise, Kravitz did too. He really was warming up, huh.

Taako wiped his tears and wheezed. “Anyway, I came to tell you dinner is ready so you can stop creeping outside my house and just do it inside instead.”

That took him by surprise, even more than the sneaking around. “You… made dinner?”

“Yeah, see, it’s this thing that comes between lunch and bedtime.”

“I know what dinner is.”

“Good! Then come inside, it’s gonna get cold-”

“Taako,” he stopped short, and so did the elf, both noticing it was the first time Kravitz actually addressed him by his actual name and not some annoying pet name. ”I’m… thankful, but I don’t need to eat. I’m dead, see? This body is only for show.”

“And what a show.”

Kravitz coughed. “What I mean is, you don’t…” _need to waste your resources on me_ , is what he was about to say. But more food for Kravitz meant less food for Taako. Did that count as murder? “... know me very well. We just met a week ago, I don’t want to be a bother.”

“Aw, that’s cute, but think nothing of it. If I don’t get to know you now, then when? We are the only people left in the entire fucking world.”

Kravitz smiled. “That’s true. But I’m still on the job.”

“Honey, I _am_ your job.”

That did get a chuckle from Kravitz. He only had to pretend to consider it before giving up. “Alright, alright, I’m coming.”

They made it to the entrance, but before Kravitz could put a feet inside, he saw something falling by the corner of his eye. There was a black feather on the ground next to him. He looked up, but the sky was empty of any creature, winged or otherwise. However, traces of a rift could still be seen above the doorway. Taako’s voice called from inside, “Hey, the dining room is over here.”

“Just a minute, I think I dropped something by the shore.”

He walked around the house and made his way to the seaside with the feather from the entrance in one hand and a handful more from his pocket in the other. He dropped them around himself and kneeled down.

“ _I’ve got good news, it might help you endure for the time being._ ”

“What is it?”

“ _He’s the only one left._ ”

A wave of relief passed through Kravitz. He hadn’t even thought about more survivors, but now that that possibility was out of the question, it did make him feel better about his situation. “Thank you, my goddess.”

The call was ended. Kravitz put the feathers back into his pockets and made his way to the entrance. Now that he had something less to worry about, he could finally appreciate the savory aroma coming from the dining room. Funny, it was like nothing he would’ve expected from a post-apocalyptic meal.

And, you know what? If they were getting chummy…

“It seems I’ve dropped,” he paused, then spoke up in a normal tone of voice, “my accent.”

Taako slammed his hand on the table as laughter invaded him again.

He glanced one last time to the shore before closing the door. The weather was still nice, but hopefully it wouldn’t last much longer.

And so, the day went by.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again, sorry for my cockney. Use your imagination.


	3. The Door

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The begining of two quests. Tensions are acknowledged but not solved.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello kids welcome to the real world where chapter counts are made up and your own outline doesn't matter. I ran out of chapters to fit stuff in which SUCKS because if you havent noticed Im naming them after parts of the phrase "the last man in the world bla bla bla knock knock," so fuck me i guess
> 
> also the rating went up BUT ITS NOT WHAT YOU THINK. YOULL REACH ONE PART IN THE STORY WHERE YOULL BE LIKE "ah i see this is the part" BUT ITS NOT, AND THEN YOULL REACH ANOTHER PART AND YOULL KNOW, YOU WILL KNOW WHY I UPPED THE RATING, AND YOULL WISH I DIDNT
> 
> so yeah, uh, one last thing, remember how i said it was going to be mostly comedy? fun story, shit got kiiiinda real. you wont get to the heavier stuff until next episode but if you arent into that heavy stuff i totally get it. i mean, theres still going to be some shits and giggles but. yeah.
> 
> enjoy

If Kravitz was going to solve the mystery of Taako, first he’d have to find out as much as he could about the place that had managed to shelter him during the apocalypse. Not that he doubted his magical powers, Taako did raise the land alone (as far as he could tell, seeing as there was no one else with him in the island). But after a couple weeks of convivence, Kravitz got to know Taako more as a person, his personality, quirks and overall take on life. And he just couldn’t, for the death of himself, understand how the elf had managed to survive on his own for so long.

“Oh, oh no, I think I’m going to fall…! Just kidding.” Right now, for example, he was fixing the cottage’s ceiling after the rain tore it open the night before. Kravitz was hoping it would turn into a storm, but the sky cleared up after a couple hours, and Taako kindly informed him it was still among the standard weather patterns of the beach-turned-island.

And to the elf’s credit, he knew a useful amount of spells to make do in domestic situations. A flick of his _umbra staff_ (a sort of umbrella turned magic wand) and the ceiling was technically fixing itself while Taako made a fool of himself.

“It sure would be inconvenient if a small breeze knocked me down right now,” and lo and behold, the wind blowed. So raising the land to survive was a waste of spell slots but blowing himself off the ceiling to spite Kravitz wasn’t. Taako let himself be carried out of bounds until there was nothing under his feet, and… he popped the umbrella open and landed gracefully on a windowsill. “Nope, I’m good. Sorry to disappoint.”

Kravitz was not amused. “I know I’m not that lucky.”

Taako snorted, and it seemed like he was about to say something else when he shifted his legs to a more comfortable position, but that was a missed acrobatics check. He fell off the window.

Kravitz held his breath.

… “I’m fine!”

Aaand he sighed. Not that lucky.

Taako managed to get up on his own and made his way back inside the house in an undignifying limp “What’s ten HP worth these days anyway.”

Kravitz followed, but not before eyeing slyly the section of the wall where wood turned to glass.

Mystery after mystery.

Then came the so called “Taako time”, a.k.a., the day of the week Taako politely asked Kravitz to leave the house until sunset. He would’ve rather keep tabs on the elf 24/7, but even though the elf had offered Kravitz a place on his table and free roaming around most areas in the house, there was no convincing him of letting Kravitz stay on that specific day. That had arisen suspicion on the Grim Reaper almost immediately.

Now, two weeks later, Kravitz still wasn’t sure what exactly went down on sundays. He had considered the possibility that “Taako time” was just a non-t.m.i. way of refer to his masturbation habits, but the theory lost all grounds around the second day of his stay with the elf, because Taako was making absolutely no effort to hide how much he wanted to get on Kravitz’s pants.

* * *

 

“That’s my room. You are welcome any time unless the door is closed, in that case you are still welcome but only if you agree to help me out.”

“I won’t bother you, don’t worry.”

* * *

 

“Shower time, you wanna come? They say it saves on water!”

“I don’t need to shower. Also, the world is already dead so there’s no point to environmentalism anymore.”

* * *

 

“Boy, you look tense, have I told you I’ve got proficiency in the massage skill?”

“Do you?”

“... I mean, how different can it be from kneading dough?”

“I’m fine, thank you.”

* * *

 

“...”

“...”

“... When you turn into a skeleton-“

“Is this going to end in a bone, anatomical, and bone, sexual, pun?”

“... Maybe.”

“Please, don’t.”

* * *

 

The whole “beauty ritual” was also nothing but a big fat lie, and it wasn’t one Taako put any real effort into maintaining. Whenever Kravitz asked about it, all he did was give half-answers that didn’t match with each other. One time he went as far as telling Kravitz he did his nails on sundays, while _painting_ them.

And on top of that: the food.

“Today’s special is… lasagna! Thanks to our sponsors bolognese sauce and mushrooms.”

There wasn’t any hiding in the fact that Kravitz was _loving_ every part of it. He wanted to keep his distance and wait for Taako’s death without any unnecessary confrontations, but dinner time was one of the few moments of the day where the two of them could sit down and have a civil conversation. “Oh, this is wonderful.”

Taako watched him eat for ten seconds before helping himself to his own plate, smiling all the time. “So, you could say it is… “

“Sorry, I really like this, but I don’t think it was my favourite dish.”

Taako raised his hands. “Come on, Krav! Give me something here!”

“Your food is delicious, can’t I just tell you my favorite of the ones I’ve had here?”

“No, that’s cheating.” Taako chewed on his food, angrily. “Besides, I’m pretty sure you wouldn’t know what to pick because you just love everything I give you.” That was one hundred percent true.

The whole deal had started about two weeks ago. After Kravitz complimented his culinary skills, Taako made an offhand comment about how he just couldn’t pass an opportunity to cook for someone, and that if Kravitz had any requests he could work his magic to make it happen one day. Kravitz was honest, as honest as one who doesn’t have anything to answer could be. “It’s fine, I don’t have a favorite meal.”

Taako was horrified. “What? Of course you do! Who doesn’t have a favorite meal?”

“Someone who doesn’t need to eat, maybe?”

“Oh my god. Don’t tell me, this is the first time you eat?”

Kravitz shrugged. “In a while, yeah.”

“Ugh, I said don’t tell me!” Taako buried his face on his hands. He looked so desperate it was giving Kravitz second hand embarrassment. It wasn’t that big of a deal, right? “Ah!” He emerged from his miserable state, fully recovered. “Of course, you are _dead_! Not not-alive, you’ve used the word “dead”, right?”

“Well, yes?”

“So it means you _lived_ at some point.”

And again, Kravitz had nothing to hide. “I was alive once, yes, before I became a Grim Reaper.”

“That’s it!” Taako slammed the table and stood up. “You just need to remember what you liked back then! One bite and you’ll go full ratatouille with some random happy memory from the good ol’ days of mortal Kravitz!”

And just like that began Taako’s culinary quest. Every day, every meal always brought something different. Pancakes for breakfast on Monday, waffles on Tuesday, fruit salad and yogurt on Wednesday. Lunch was simple while dinners were always a bit more fancy, but both equally delicious. And there was always dessert, which seemed to be Taako’s specialty, with a cup of tea for himself and coffee (black, still no vanilla) for Kravitz.

Under other circumstances, Kravitz would have let himself be spoiled rotten. It was true he didn’t have a need for eating, but that didn’t mean he didn’t enjoy it any less, and Taako was _really_ good at what he did. Unfortunately, he had work to do, and finding out what was keeping Taako alive was proving to be more difficult than he initially thought. There was still no signs of food running out.

“You are really working magic with these dishes,” he mentioned once, disguising it as a compliment, “where do you even get all those ingredients?”

Taako was currently working on a batch of sugar cookies and happily made a show of his skill in the kitchen. “Magic is the right word, my friend. I’ll have you know I used to be known for my proficiency in the culinary arts.”

“You were a chef? Can’t say I’m surprised.”

“Oh, but you’d be. This here is but a fraction of my true abilities,” and as if he wasn’t trying, he sprinkled a pinch of sand into the mix that turned into salt midway to the bowl, then he winked, because of course. “But, you know, not much you can do with these resources. End of the world and all that.”

_Oh, don’t remind me._

“I’ve been transmuting the few ingredients I have available into others so at least I have a wider set of options. Can’t live on an all pasta diet, I’m not a fucking animal.”

“How does it work? What are your limits?”

Taako was about to answer, but then he thought better of it and eyed Kravitz suspiciously instead. “You are awful curious all of a sudden. Is this a trick to take my soul?”

Shit, too far already. Of course Taako would catch onto his intentions if he went poking his nose on the elf’s business so carelessly. He’d already lose the first battle on the secret for Taako Time.

“Because you couldn’t convince me to go to heaven if it had a freezer full of dodo meat, my man, I’m not that desperate!” And he was back to mixing.

Kravitz fought the urge to visible sigh of relief. “You got me, guess we’ll have to throw it all away.”

Taako smiled smugly. “That’s what you get for trying to break my iron will,” and he pointed at Kravitz with an iron spoon to make it more of a point. “Ah, but we still want to find your favourite dish. What if it _is_ something out of limits? Say, how do you feel about meat?”

“Which meat?”

“Any meat, I can’t synthesize animal tissue from plants or minerals. I also can’t synthesize other random shit, like vanilla, so you need to stop asking every fucking time you make your disgusting bean water.”

“It wouldn’t be disgusting if it had vanilla,” Kravitz said. Taako snorted at that. “Besides, you’ve made other dishes using animal byproducts before.”

Taako retrieved a tray from the oven and applied oil, then put the cookie dough in a bag and quickly arranged the mix in small circles. It was mesmerizing. “We are going full vegan in this household, honey. Everything milky is either almond or soy. That omelette you had the other day? Full of lies. There’s not gonna be meat for dinner unless you straight up vore me.”

That did answer some of his questions, but there was still no way to ask about the state of the… Wait. “What was that last part?”

“Uh, what? The omelette? I guess it _technically_ isn’t an omelette if it doesn’t have eggs-“

“No, no, after that. What’s vore?”

 _Splurt_.

Taako was holding the bag of mix so hard it splattered all if its content on the tray and part of the kitchen table. “It’s uhhhhhh, y-you know, nothing! No, it’s nothing, haha, silly me, making up words.”

Huh, now that was an interesting reaction. “It means something, doesn’t it? Come on, just tell me.”

“Nope,” Taako cleaned the mess he just did with diligence but he was still visibly tense, “we are not having this conversation in front of the cookies.”

“Is it about eating?” And ah, yeah, of course. The small talk was over and they were back to antagonizing each other. “You are making fun of me because I can’t kill you, aren’t you? Because cannibalizing is also on the list of shit I’m not allowed to do.”

“Shut up! It’s just a stupid word I shouldn’t have used!”

“Well, guess what? Even if I was allowed to, I wouldn’t vore _you_!”

“DON’T USE IT TOO, FOR FUCK’S SAKE.”

“Oh, I’m sorry! Why don’t you finish those cookies so I can actually vore something?”

“OH MY GOD. GET OUT OF MY KITCHEN. GET OUT OF MY HOUSE. YOU ARE BANNED FROM DINNER TONIGHT _AND_ COOKIES.”

“What?! You can’t be ser-“

And _poof!_ , Kravitz was standing outside, still no clue of where Taako was getting his food, no idea what vore meant, and no cookies, period..

* * *

 

And last but not least: the fucking house. The more he spent inside it, the more he wondered how Taako had come to live in a place like the cottage. It was obviously meant to host a big number of people at a time, but Taako had never mentioned a family; he could’ve been trying to hide their information from Kravitz, though.

But even ignoring that, assuming Taako had an use for all that space, the way everything was arranged inside the house… something didn’t match. For example, most of the furniture, which was made of wood, seemed a bit too rustic in contrast with the fine drapes and paintings adorning the walls. For someone who took so much care of his physical appearance (whether or not the beauty ritual was real), the overall impression Kravitz got from the house was that Taako didn’t really know what he wanted to do with it. He took great care of the kitchen area and his cooking implements, and Kravitz could only guess at the state of the elf’s room, but the rest was a mess. A clean one, yes, but still a mess. And for some reason, the only piece of coherent decoration trend were those wooden ducks sitting on every flat surface.

When he decided that focusing on the place itself wasn’t going to take him anywhere, Kravitz began shifting his attention to the closest he would ever be to getting inside Taako’s mind: his books. In the past weeks, Kravitz had managed to finish over fifteen of the many different volumes that were available in the house. Aside from a rather cute interest in children's literature, Taako had mentioned a past in both the culinary arts and the magic school of transmutation, and sure enough the library had its fair amount of material on either subject. But, to Kravitz surprise, the majority of the volumes were related to theology and the word of Pan, of all things.

“Didn’t pin you as the religious type,” he mentioned.

“Hm?,” Taako was on his way to the kitchen when Kravitz made that comment, so it had taken him a little by surprise, his mind already on the meal he was about to prepare. “Oh, that. Well, I’m not the most devout follower, as you probably guessed. My way of worship is a liiiiiiittle unconventional”

“Ah, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to impose. I know not everyone has the same take on faith.”

That did seem to get Taako’s full attention. “What’s yours?”

Kravitz considered it for a while. In the time it took to find his answer, he had already decided on a book to read that day: a guide on gardening; tragically useless. “I guess it’s a bit unconventional too, the Raven Queen and I have a closer relationship than most devotees do with their deities.”

“Aw, are you besties?”

“She’s literally my boss.”

“Right, right, the whole death thing.” There was still another question Kravitz wanted to ask, but he was cut short by Taako spreading himself on top of the couch, with his legs on Kravitz’s lap. “Anyway, I’ve been meaning to ask, when is _this_ ,” and he pointed between the both of them, “going to happen?”

Ah, there was the flirting again. Kravitz eyed a drawing of blackberry bushes on the page and feigned innocence, just to mess with Taako. “I don’t know what you mean.”

Taako snorted at that. “Sorry, forgot who I was talking to. There’s this thing called sex living beings do to have fun and sometimes save the species.”

“Interesting, and what does that have to do with me?”

“Really now! The last people on the world? Last hope of life and all that? Haven’t you known your tropes, Krav?”

“Technically, you are the last man on the world,” Kravitz passed the page, this one had a beautiful illustration of vanilla flowers. “I’m already dead.”

“It’s obviously a kind of symbolical rite.” Taako said matter of factly, as if he was actually bringing upon the table a complex subject on symbolism and not just trying to get in Kravitz’s pants.

“Is this just about the symbolism, then? You hurt my feelings, Taako, I thought you at least found me physically attractive.” He glanced away from the book just in time to see Taako blushing; was it because of the teasing or the fact that he had used the elf’s name again, he couldn’t tell.

But Taako recovered quickly from that, flexing his legs and sitting closer to Kravitz on the couch. “Oh, don’t give me that crap. I’ve seen the way you look at me, you know?”

“Exasperated?”

“Enamoured, of course.”

Kravitz rolled his eyes.

Taako reached forward and Kravitz let him. They were facing each other and once again Kravitz could appreciate every detail in the elf’s face, his freckles, eyelashes, and the subtle trace of gloss on his lips. “How do you do it?”

“How do I do what?”

“Resist the need?”

“I don’t have needs,” Kravitz said, “I just have wants.” And it was the truth.

“Well, I do too. So, when are we going to do something about it?”

Kravitz pulled Taako even closer, and when he spoke again he did so against the elf’s ear, “How much do you want this?”

Taako sighed and held into Kravitz’s chest with both of his hands. “So much.”

Kravitz put one hand on Taako’s thigh and squeezed, earning a small yelp of surprise from the elf. “Really?“ He grabbed Taako’s face so they were facing each other now. Taako looked so good like this, face flushed, pupils dilated, biting his lower lip, _barely holding himself._ He was on the verge, and if only Kravitz closed the distance… “Would you die for it, Taako?”

“Nope,” Taako pushed Kravitz away and stood up. “The spell is broken, thanks for nothing.”

Kravitz didn’t move for a moment, his face unreadable, but then, he took the book on the coffee table and resumed his reading like nothing had happened. “Pity that I’m still on the clock. Maybe we can take it to my place after work? If I’m ever done here, you know.”

“Nice try, handsome, but I’ve been on my own for two years. I know how to take care of myself,” and he finally left to the kitchen.

Kravitz waited a minute, then two, then three. The distinct sound of cooking implements being used finally began, and he stood up, leaving the book back where he found it and walked out of the living room towards the northern side of the house.

There was a hall connecting some of the front rooms, and like everything else in the cottage, it had no coherence with the rest of it. Not because of the interior design; actually, if one only looked at this part of the house they wouldn’t even think something was amiss with the place’s decoration. But Kravitz had seen the rest, and he also knew something very important: how the house looked from the outside. The north wall of the house was glass. This, side, however, was made of wood.

There were no windows on this side, either. All illumination on this side of the house was dealt with lamps or even skylights on the top floors. And the best part about it was that, for someone who wasn’t paying attention, it wouldn’t seem weird at all. The north wall didn’t have any visible windows from the outside either, and the place was already so big that the space occupied by the glass part could go missing without anyone’s notice. This right here was the biggest secret of the island, and it was eating Kravitz dead.

There had to be a door somewhere, he was sure of it, but the walls inside of the house hid nothing, and neither did those on the outside. He had checked on every floor, even the ceiling, but there just didn’t seem to be a way inside. Kravitz had asked, and the answer Taako gave had been almost convincing.

“Listen, my man, you could give me all the time in the world to explore this bigass mess of a house and I still would get lost one day because a new fucking hall manifested out of thin air or something. Don’t dwell on it.” And he probably had meant most of that. Kravitz himself had to resort to rifting out of the plane to get back to the entrance on more than one occasion. The more they talked about the house, the more it seemed like Taako had stumbled upon it by chance and had decided to stay until there was nowhere left in the world to move to.

But there was was tiny, little, small detail: Kravitz could rift his way into any spot in the world.

Except that fucking glass room.

He should have known to cast detect magic before attempting to break in. Someone had put a protection spell on it, and it was a powerful one, the likes of which Kravitz had never seen in his entire career as a Grim Reaper. Because one thing was making a material durable against the forces of nature, even the apocalypse, but cutting it’s link with the astral plane? That should have been impossible.

Until now.

And Taako was a powerful wizard, one who had survived the end of the world.

“Yo, dinner is ready!”

Kravitz walked back the way he came and from there walked towards the dinning room, instead of taking the back hall’s shortcut, just in case Taako asked him about it.

“Please take a sit, _monsieur_ , today’s _menù_ is _saltèd_ _vegetablès_ with _tofù soupè_.”

“Your French accent is _très terrible_.”

“And you are one to talk, _mate._ ”

Kravitz opted to ignore that comment and digged into his plate, which was fucking delicious. “I meant to ask —not my favourite, but this is delicious —something back then.”

“Oh, have you changed your mind?”

“It’s about religion.”

Taako huffed. “Of course. What is it?”

“Why Pan?”

There was a brief pause where Taako just stared at Kravitz, as if expecting him to elaborate. “Oh. That’s it?”

Kravitz shrugged. “I’m curious. It’s been two weeks and I feel like I still don’t know you that well.”

“Hmm, I’m feeling cooperative tonight,” He took air, and… “One of my friends was a cleric of Pan’s church,” he was done.

“Oh, well, that was an easy answer.”

“Yep, that’s why it took me by surprise. Figured you’d go for something juicier.”

“Like, how does a renowned chef end up living alone in the middle of fucking nowhere?”

Taako snapped his fingers. “There you go! Now we are talking.”

Kravitz braced himself, this was it, one of the big questions.

But Taako wasn’t talking. When he noticed Kravitz was now staring at him intently, he backtracked. “Oh, I’m not actually telling you yet, you gotta earn it.”

Kravitz grunted. “Then what was the point in bringing it up?”

Taako laughed, but he did think it over. “How about this? Tell me something about you and if I think it’s juicy enough, I’ll reconsider.”

Oh man, this would be something. Kravitz figured he had nothing to lose and a lot to gain, so. “Alright, ask me anything.”

“Nuh-uh, we are not doing it like this,” Taako stabbed at one cube of tofu and pointed at Kravitz with it. “You already answer all of my questions and they are bullshit.”

“Not my fault you only care about food.”

“Watch your mouth, you are sitting at _my_ table.”

Kravitz raised his hands. “You are right, that was rude of me. Your food is delicious.”

Taako folded his arms and smiled smugly. “Damn right.”

But yeah, that conversation wasn’t going anywhere if Kravitz didn’t cooperate. What counted as “juicy”?

Well, he asked about Taako’s life, it was only fair that he answered with a similar topic. “I don’t have many memories from back when I was alive, but I do remember I wanted to be a conductor.”

It worked, if the way Taako’s eyes opened meant something. “Woah, really? Do you, like, know how to play instruments and shit?”

“A few, yeah. Piano, guitar, the flute, violin, viola, oboe-”

“That’s more than a few!” Taako pointed out, and Kravitz laughed too.

“Yeah, you are right. It’s just that, you know, there’s so much more I wanted to learn that I didn’t get the chance to before… “ he paused, “you know, before the end of the world.”

“Oh… “ Taako’s smile shifted into a worried frown. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you feel down.”

“No, no, it’s fine. It’s kinda funny, actually. When I became immortal, turning away from my life and all that, I always took comfort in knowing I’d have all the time in the world to learn new things. But, you know, the life of a Grim Reaper is pretty busy.”

“Well, you have a lot of spare time _now_.”

Kravitz glared at Taako, “That’s what you think.”

“I know for a fact I’m not dying just yet,” he said, glaring back.

But their little stare down died almost immediately. It wasn’t the first time they had that conversation, and it wouldn’t be the last.

“Okay, okay,” Taako brought his hands together, “the jury is about to give its verdict… you passed, yay! I guess I have to tell you my sad backstory now.”

“Just the juicy details.”

“Let’s get some tea before.”

Indeed, both their plates were already empty. Huh, Kravitz didn’t even notice.

Taako came back with a kettle pot, two cups, and brew himself some tea while Kravitz made coffee (black, still no vanilla) for himself. “Alright, this might take you by surprise but this is not my house.”

It did the opposite of taking Kravitz by surprise, but he nodded just to be polite.

“I already told you about my cleric friend, right? When he passed away he put me in charge of taking care of his stuff, a.k.a. this bigass house in the middle of nowhere.”

“Oh, that’s it? Guess I should have gone for something even juicier.”

“I’m not done, sheesh!,” Taako took a sip from his tea and Kravitz did the same almost involuntarily. “This was like, a century ago. I used to live with my sister back then.”

Kravitz clinged to that last detail, making his best effort not to show how much it meant to him. “You had a sister?”

“Yeah, we were twins,” he winked, “though I was the pretty one. Anyways, we used to come here once a week to do the old man’s chores and all that. That is, until she died two years ago.”

Taako took another sip of his tea and let Kravitz make the connection. “I’m sorry about your loss. So you moved in after that, right?”

“Yep, that lazy fuck was never one for cleaning after her own shit, let alone someone else’s,” and he laughed, but Kravitz could tell he was trying to hide how he really felt about it.

Kravitz felt a bit awkward. He was no stranger to grief, but well, his field of work basically consisted in taking people away from their loved ones.

Taako noticed this, though, and made an attempt to lighten the mood. “I bet you are already doing the math to figure out if you’ve met someone with my face in the last couple years.”

“I think I’d remember a face like yours,” he said, hoping to the gods that it would help him hide his embarrassment. But yeah, thinking about that, he was sure he’d at least recognize Taako’s face the day they met if his sister had tried something funny. “I don’t think we ever met, though, so she must have gone peacefully.”

Taako thought about that for a moment, then smiled. “Yeah, she totally did.”

They stayed in silence for a while. Kravitz wondered if Taako ever felt lonely, even more now that he knew he was the last man left on Faerun. Maybe he could use that, casually mention his sister was already on the other side, probably waiting for him.

But no, it didn’t feel like the right moment to do something like that.

Taako downed the rest of his cup and stood up. “You done with yours yet?”

Kravitz raised his cup. “Still some more to go.”

“Dude, I have over twenty different brews of tea in here and you always pick that plain ass black coffee. What happened to your British motif?”

“It’s gone forever, thank you very much. Besides, I’ve always liked coffee better… “ and then it hit him. Kravitz stood up and pointed the cup at Taako. “I like coffee better!”

“Y-yeah, man, I got it the first time,” Taako said leaning away from the cup and any possible spilling.

“Don’t you get it? I have a _preference_.”

Taako stared at Kravitz, then at the cup, then at Kravitz again, and he gasped. “You favourite meal is _coffee_?! Out of all the masterpieces I’ve prepared these past weeks and you choose the _bean water?_ ”

But it made perfect sense to Kravitz. He began explaining, “I don’t need to eat, but my job can be pretty taxing,” he stared down at his cup again. “Coffee is practically all I’ve ever had for centuries. There was a café in Neverwinter I used to frequent, they even knew my order by heart.” He noticed the way Taako was looking at him, almost _offended_ , maybe with reason. “I know it’s not very elaborate, but you told me my favourite meal had to be something that made me reminiscence of the happy times in my life. I mean, I still don’t know what I actually liked back then, but drinking coffee reminds me of the few times I had as a reaper where I could just sit down and not worry about all the work I had to do.”

His sincerity seemed to work, as Taako’s scowl softened. “I mean, that’s cute and all, but what’s the merit in remembering plain black coffee anyways? Even a monkey could do that.”

Kravitz laughed, “True,” and took a sip. There was still something missing… “But, that wasn’t my order. I used to ask for an extra shot of vanilla.”

Taako’s face fell. “Oh.”

“So, we did it! The mystery is over,” one of them, at least. It really seemed like a small happy ending to their quest, until Kravitz noticed the shift in the elf’s mood. “Ah, right, you can’t synthesize vanilla.”

“I mean, I had already considered the chance you liked meat, this isn’t any different.“ He seemed… really bummed out. It didn’t even cross Kravitz’s mind that this would affect Taako so much. But he was a chef, after all. Maybe finding Kravitz’s favourite meal had become the only source of purpose he had left in the world.

So this was actually good, right? No drive in life meant no will to live, this was something Kravitz wanted.

“You know what? There must be a bottle of extract left somewhere around here.”

Kravitz snapped out of that train of thought. “Really? I mean, you don’t have to do anything, I honestly think your food is better than plain, erm, bean water.”

“Pff, I already know that, my dude, I’m the shit.” Taako leaned over and put both hands on Kravitz shoulders. “But this isn’t about my expert hands turning dishes into magic mouth orgasm town. We are talking about _feelings_ and shit, so if you tell me the double bean water makes your dead heart go doki doki, then Imma get you that extra bean magic!”

That was… actually sweet of him, as useless as it probably was. Kravitz smiled despite of himself. “Thank you, Taako, I really appreciate it.”

“You are very much welcome,” and he bowed dramatically. “But we are not done here. This whole “talking” deal? I really like it. What else you got?”

“That depends, what else _you_ got?”

They stayed up late talking. Not about the mysteries of their lives, deaths, and the dead world that hosted them. Just random stories, cooking incidents and rogue souls. And since none of them needed to sleep, it was a long night.

* * *

 

Another sunday rolled by. With nothing else to do, Kravitz usually went on walks near the coast —the actual coast in land, which was only a couple miles away from Taako’s island. He used that time to tell The Raven Queen about his findings. She was, if anything, a good boss, giving advice to the best of her capacity and keeping Kravitz in good spirits.

“ _Food transmutation? So that’s how he’s been doing it?_ ”

“Yes, seen it at work myself. His abilities are limited to whatever it is that’s left on his storage, though. He can’t synthesize meat, among other things.”

“ _Still, that’s a pretty handy skill to have in the end of the world. Doesn’t come as a surprise from the elf who’s been raising the land above sea level for years._ ”

It was a pretty fucking good skill, conceded Kravitz’s stomach. It was hard admitting that Taako excelled at this surviving game of his while all he could do was down his rations one meal at a time.

Even with that, the Raven Queen still found something to say that would cheer Kravitz up. “ _He will run out of prime materials to do his magic sooner or later._ ”

“I’m sure of it, I just can’t wait to see the day. Any updates on my request?” Kravitz had asked a week ago about future forecasts of natural disasters in the area. He had found a loophole in the laws that prevented agents of Death from taking lives themselves: basically, if there was to be an accident that wasn’t caused by Kravitz, and he managed to lure Taako into it, he could get away with the elf’s death. All he had to do was find the perfect storm and make sure Taako was there when it happened.

But like it had been established before, he wasn’t going to be that lucky. “ _I’ve tried to reach Pan about the matter, but he is not taking my calls._ ” She clicked her tongue, “ _Poor guy, must be awful busy, and I’m one to talk.”_

The god of nature? Absolutely. Even with no plant or animal life to rule over, there must have been a lot of work on his hands. The world still had a long ways of burning down ahead of it. Kravitz sighed. Oh, how he longed the sweet release of destruction too.

“ _But_ _I do have news about my own theory,_ ” the Raven Queen chirped in, audibly excited to share her findings. “ _Istus is not talking to me._ ”

“Oh. And that is… good?”

“ _Kravitz, she’s outright avoiding me! Istus knows we’ve been working on this for so long, how much this little soul is messing everything up._ ” The Raven Queen croaked and Kravitz could even hear the rustle of her feathers. “ _Oh, I can read her like an open book._ ”

But Kravitz didn’t find it funny at all. “Is that all you wanted to tell me?”

“ _There’s one last thing._ ” And her voice changed, turning more serious and… concerned? “ _Your mission is to guide the elf’s soul to me once he’s died._ ”

“Yes, and I will do so, my goddess.”

“ _You are under no obligation to do anything else. Whatever you do in the meantime, is your choice._ ”

He didn’t like the tone of her voice. “What do you mean by that?”

“ _Listen, Kravitz, there’s no nice way of putting this: I still don’t know how long he has ahead of himself.”_

Had Kravitz been a lesser man, he would’ve yelled. “So? That doesn’t mean I get to slack until the forces of nature actually do their job.”

“ _It doesn’t mean you have to stress about it indefinitely either. You’ve done an excellent job so far, but I’m afraid it might be taking its toll on you._ ”

Kravitz thought about it, but what else was he supposed to do? Everything in the world was gone. There was no more music, no more art, the only books left were the religion tomes of a god who was too busy to answer his peers’ calls, gardening guides full of extinct species, and children’s detective novels..

So at the end of it, it was back to Taako again. Even if he didn’t want it, he had become the center of his world.

Kravitz had nothing else left. Honestly, when was the last time he did? He just wanted to be done with everything and leave.

He was about to retort, probably say a bunch of things he would have regretted later, but suddenly the ground was shaking. A small shriek of surprise escaped him.

“ _Kravitz? What’s wrong?”_

“I fell, my goddess. It’s an earthquake.”

An earthquake!

“I must go back.”

“ _Good luck._ ”

“I don’t have any of that,” Kravitz opened a rift to the astral plane and jumped inside. A couple crows greeted him, which he took as a good omen. When he opened the rift back again, he stared at the retreating sea, leaving only the corpses of the life it once harbored.

Soon, the wave would come, taking the last of life from the world with it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :^)
> 
> ch 4 will be up on friday. its already done but i have a lot of stuff on my plate next week so i opted to split this episode in two and make the wait less painful for all of us.
> 
> in the meantime you can hmu on twitter (@SitaNorita) or comission me to make Kravitz and Taako actually get at it (jk ill do something about it in this fic) (but also no kidding ill write your smuts)


	4. The Room

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And Taako dies. The end.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ditching the chapter count and titles, dont mind me

Kravitz had to pry the door open with his scythe. His corporeal form melted into his bones and he called for his host. “I’m sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but your stroke of luck ends now. The wave will be here in a matter of minutes.”

There was no answer. Stubborn until the end, that elf.

Kravitz walked inside and looked for Taako all around. “You can still chose to have a quick death. Trust me, you don’t want to get caught by the current. Been there before, not nice.” The living room was empty. He looked in the kitchen, where everything was clean except for one dish and its respective cutlery. Nothing in the bathroom either, and even the door to Taako’s room was wide open.

The house was too big to check every room in time, but Taako was still not answering. Where was he? He didn’t get on the boat that day, right? The tide would have killed him already, but Kravitz would have felt his death anywhere in the world…

Unless Taako managed to die somewhere outside his reach.

“Shit!”

Kravitz ran to the back hall. There was a door on the floor where once was only hardwood. Of course, Taako was a transmutation expert, it had been there all along. Kravitz didn’t think twice before jumping down. It was dark, but the fire of his eyes lighted the way.

He only made it a couple steps ahead before an unknown force pushed him outwards. “No!” His eyes crackled, Kravitz tried again and again, but there was no way for him to get past the barrier. The glass room was completely isolated from the astral plane. But this was the material plane!

No, it was, but _he_ wasn’t. Kravitz turned back into his corporeal form, even went as far as to vanish his scythe. Hoping it would work, he walked forward, and…

There was no resistance this time! In front of him laid a set of stairs, the smallest hint of light shining from above. Kravitz reached the top and pushed, finding that there was a door, which opened easily.

The room was bright, so much that the contrast blinded his mortal eyes for a moment. It took him a lot more than expected to become accustomed to it, but after that he finally saw…

Green.

“... What?”

Green, and red, and green, and yellow, and green, and pink, and green, and blue, and green.

The light outside the polarized glass shining above, and green.

Water being shot from sprinklers, and green.

Leaves, tendrils, stems, and petals. Everything was colorful, as much as he wasn’t, and _alive_ , as much as he would never be again. And Kravitz, who didn’t even need his lungs, was struck out of breath.

Because somehow, he was inside a greenhouse.

He ventured inside, speechless. Plant life of all kinds was growing from pots and interior gardens. From small flowers to medium sized trees that reached to the top of the glass ceiling. Decorative bushes and fruits almost too leafy to make way. The place was so big, and yet it felt packed.

How? How had all of it survived for so long?

No, it made everything else make sense now: the glass, the secrecy, the gardening books. Even the fact that food never seemed to run out had a reason, of course Taako would try to keep _this_ a secret.

He knew the magic to raise the land _and_ cut all ties of a room with the astral plane, keeping a garden in his own house was nothing. Add to that his transmutation magic and Taako could get anything he needed out of-

“Don’t move.”

Kravitz froze in place. Right, he was looking for Taako. But Taako found him first.

“I said, don’t move, how hard is it to follow simple instructions?”

 _But I didn’t-_ Still in shock, Kravitz almost didn’t realize Taako wasn’t actually talking to him. But then, to whom? What else was he hiding inside this room?

Kravitz peered around a bush of blackberries and there he was, with his back turned towards him. The room was empty of any other creature besides the two of them, but Taako kept talking.

“You don’t like to be treated nicely, don’t you? It’s always like this, every time I believe you are learning, that you would behave, you go and give me this shit.” The elf lowered his voice, almost to a guttural sound. “It’s almost like you like to be punished.”

A chill ran down Kravitz’s spine. What… was Taako doing?

“So this is how it’s going to be? Then I’m sorry, I don’t think I’m in the mood for it.” Taako made as if he would turn around and Kravitz ducked behind the bushes, his heart on his throat. But then, Taako stopped short. “Oh, a little desperate, aren’t we? Fine, you can move then. _Beg_.”

Another chill ran through Kravitz’s legs and he stared with horror at the vines that slowly took possession of Taako’s limbs. The elf hummed, apparently happy with this, and it made something inside Kravitz’s human stomach turn. Was he breathing too? He needed to turn those functions down before something or another gave away his position, but these unwanted physical reactions wouldn’t stop.

Taako, on his part, was back to talking, and Kravitz had the awful suspicion that he’d soon find out to whom. “There you go, was it that hard? But I’m still not convinced. Why should I stay here with you? Because I know you want this, but what about what _I_ want?” 

Kravitz finally opted to turn down all of his synaptic links, save from the ones that allowed him movement. He couldn’t tear his eyes apart from the scene that was taking place in front of him, the impossibility of it all. Taako surrounded by vines that seemed to have a mind of their own, and he was talking to them, Taako was talking and the vines answered to his words, one by one, slowly taking him. Kravitz could see small, light-yellow flowers blooming from them, and just before he closed his olfactory receptors he noticed their smell was slowly spreading across the room. What was that? Vani-?

The world was upside-down.

Kravitz let out a scream, he was being held by the ankles and only just then he realized he was surrounded by vines, all of them thorny. How didn’t he feel the pain? Oh, right, no synapsis. But honestly, what was a bunch of bruises compared to the fact that he had given his position away.

Taako turned around and stared directly at him with a mix of surprise, confusion, concern, and anger. Mostly anger. “What the fuck are you doing here?!”

“I can explain-,” One of the vines holding him by the leg began pulling at it, soon followed by the others, and while Kravitz wasn't feeling pain right now he still screamed, scythe materializing in his hand.

Taako shrieked. “No, wait! Don’t cut them!”

“They are strangling me!”

“You are invading _their space_ after I explicitly asked you to _stay the fuck away!_ ”

Kravitz figured he deserved most of what was happening to him. “Then help me! Talk them down or something!”

For some reason, Taako flushed violently at that. “Shit, how long have you been in here?!” But he didn’t actually wait for an answer before walking towards them. The vines holding Taako let go with just a gesture of the elf’s hand, and when he made it to Kravitz, the plant life there seemed to still.

Kravitz kept fighting and tugging at the vines until he felt Taako’s glare on him too.

The elf’s voice was firm. “Put him down. _Now._ ”

Kravitz fell to the floor with a thud. “Ouch,” he wasn’t feeling pain right now, but the gesture was still so rude.

The vines retreated, and all the plants in the greenhouse went back to normal. After the rustling of leaves ceased, the room fell silent for a moment.

Kravitz tried to say something, but Taako beat him to it. “Let’s talk outside.” He didn’t help or even wait for Kravitz to get up before he walked towards the entrance, and he didn’t say anything else until the both of them crossed the door and walked down the stairs under the the trapdoor, which was the only source of light now.

“Taako, listen-”

“No! You listen to me!,” he retrieved the umbra staff and pointed it at Kravitz. “I don’t give a shit if you were sent by half the pantheon to hunt my ass down, there are rules, and you fucking _broke them!_ ”

“What?! When have I-?!” A small flame burned on the umbra staff’s tip. Kravitz walked back and held his hands high, speaking in a calmer but firm tone of voice. “I’ve never tried to kill you.”

“I’m not talking about that, you dipshit! I’m talking about you staying on my fucking house, eating my fucking food, and looking around my fucking stuff! If I set some boundaries you _respect_ them!”

That was… shit, of course it sounded wrong, but it hadn’t been like that. “I didn’t mean to-”

“What? Be a rude piece of shit? Because that’s what you are! You just didn’t know you were doing anything wrong because you think of me as another of your lost souls,” Taako stopped pointing the umbrella at him, but still held it tightly and ready to shoot if the Kravitz tried something. He was still angry, so, so angry. “It’s not my fault the _puny little human_ was offered immortality and now he doesn’t know how to deal with it. Welcome to the club, asshole, it sucks! You live forever and in the end it’s just you and all this free time that you don’t know how to fill because everything and everyone you ever cared about is fucking DEAD! But guess what? I am still alive, and my soul belongs to _me!_ ”

Kravitz was stunned. “I’m- that’s not- _what_?! What do you even-?” Oh, the fucking _nerve_ of this man. Kravitz had been around for millennia on his own and managed just fine, but this stupid mortal was faced with two years of solitude and suddenly he knew all about him? Kravitz had _earned_ his rest, and every second Taako was alive it was taken away from him.

Taako glared at him, the umbra staff still held tightly, his back to the entrance to the greenhouse and a face that said _try and get past me, see what happens_.

He could kill him right now, steal the soul right from his body, laws of the dead be damned.

But he didn’t need to. “Do you wanna know why I came? There was an earthquake.”

Even under the dim light, Kravitz could see the color dry from Taako’s face. “What did you say?”

“The sea has retreated, and in a matter of minutes this whole place will be swept away by the tidal wave. It’s over, Taako! You’ve got nowhere else to-!”

Taako pushed him to the side and made a run for it.

“Wait! _Fuck!_ ”

Kravitz followed Taako to the main hall, where the door was still open and slamming against the wall in the wind. The both of them made it to the outside barely seconds apart; Taako was standing feets away from the entrance when Kravitz made it to the door, and when he stepped outside, he felt the water up to his ankles.

The wave? But this… this wasn’t what he had imagined.

In front of him, the sea roared. Waves crashed against the floor, seaspray made it difficult to see clearly, but none of them ever made it to the front of the house, although the water level rising made it hard to stay afoot.

Taako was running around the house, umbrella still in hand, even if the current made it harder for him. Kravitz made an effort to follow him but Taako was still faster, until he kneeled down. “What are you doing?!”

“I’m surviving!” He gasped for air and duck his head under the water.

Suddenly, there was another earthquake. But not quite. The floor under his feet shook, Kravitz felt to his knees too, but he didn’t get as wet as Taako, because the water level was going down. Soon, the shoreline retreated, until the waves crashing against it were no closer than four hundred feet from them.

Kravitz tried getting up a couple times before getting it right. The floor wasn’t shaking anymore, but his body mortal body was finally giving up under its bruises. Ten feet in front of him, Taako was now lying on his side.

He made a run for it.

Taako’s face was wet with sand on his cheeks and hair clinging to it. His clothes were dripping too, and his chest raised and lowered at a hasty speed.

But Taako was still alive.

“Told ya, fucker.”

And then he fainted.

* * *

 

Kravitz was sitting outside the cottage, thinking about the past few hours. After retelling himself the events of the day a few times, he was sure of at least three things:

  1. Taako had survived.
  2. He was hiding a garden inside his house.
  3. Said garden was keeping him alive.



The sea had calmed down too. Sadly, for each new answer he got, it seemed like five new questions took its place. What happened to the ocean? Kravitz was sure an earthquake of that magnitude was powerful enough to cause a tsunami. And yet, the house had barely been affected by the rising tide —some rooms on the first floor were flooded, permanently ruining part of the tapestry, but it was an insignificant loss compared to, you know, life.

Said life was currently resting in his room. After fainting at the beach, Kravitz had to carry Taako there himself, it was the least he could do after being bested in such a way. Truth to be told, he was still impressed by the elf’s feat. Feeling the floor shake and rise, just being there when it happened, it was so much different than hearing Taako talk about it like it was but a slight pain in the ass.

But it did leave him out of it for three hours now. Was it always like this? The fact that Taako had been doing it for two years now really put things to perspective, and there was still no sign of him waking up anytime soon

And when he did, what would they do? He kind of had told Kravitz to go fuck himself.

There was a caw and Kravitz jumped on his seat. “I’m sorry, I didn’t see you there. If it’s not urgent, could you be back… later.”

The crow staring at him, unlike any other he had seen before, was white.

“Who are you?”

It cawed again and took flight. To Kravitz's ears, it meant “Follow me.” The bird ascended until it reached a rift that had opened half a mile away from the ground.

Kravitz thought twice before turning into his astral form and following it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i knowwww this was short but i had to split it again, theres going to be a little intermission next update and then well be back on schedule


	5. Alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A lot to think about.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good news: nanowrimo timeeeee this means i have an actual writing (and hopefully posting) schedule now  
> Bad news: nanowrimo means no editing. I mean, ill still edit the stuff i post here, but it will be way more shallow, i cant realy afford to rewrite entire chapters anymore, so sorry in advance for the drop in quality!
> 
> in other news, i went back to chapter 4 and edited some wording in the garden scene because it was sounding too noncon-y and im not one for that shit. still sorry for making you read that :(
> 
> enjoy this chapter!

_Taako approached Lup making as little noise as possible; it was a good stealth check, he thought, but the way her ears twitched told him she knew he was in the room the moment he stepped inside. Despite that, she still didn’t acknowledge him first. “Yo, Lup, dinner is ready.”_

_“Mhm, be there in five minutes.”_

_“No, you’ll be there right the fuck now. You’ve been working on that nerd shit for, like, ten hours.”_

_“Ten already?” Lup stared at the clock on top of the desk incredulously. “Shit, sorry, but I’m really about to finish this! So what if you go ahead and I’ll join you in five- two! Two more minutes, please?”_

_“Yeah, no fucking way. You are coming with me now or I’ll eat your part.”_

_Lup made a pout, but Taako was not impressed. He invented that pout, honey. “Fine, but you are interfering with science, you know!”_

_“Whatever you say, nerd.”_

_He teased some more on the way to the dining room, and Lup teased back, but for all their bantering and fooling around, Taako was really getting worried for his sister._

_Lup tried to make some small chat over dinner, the weather this, friend gossip that, she even made a comment or two about her investigation, and all while stuffing her mouth without any regard for Taako’s food._

_“Woah there, are you even tasting what you eat?!”_

_“Shure‘m! Ish delicioush!”_

_“You smack my hands when I eat your food too fast.”_

_She gulped. “That’s because you eat like a fucking animal,” and laughed at him while taking yet another insane amount of food raising it towards her mouth, but stopped short after noticing Taako’s sever look on her. “Hey, everything ok?”_

_Taako sighed. He had been trying to come up with a way to approach it, but subtlety wasn’t his thing. “I think you need to tone it down with this research of yours.”_

_“Why? I mean, yeah, ok, I’ve been focused on it for the past, what, four weeks?”_

_“Lup, it’s been two months.”_

_“What? Okay, now you are fucking with me.”_

_“Tomorrow is Magnus’ birthday.”_

_Lup dropped her food back to the plate and stood up. “Shit! Why didn’t you tell me?! The cake-”_

_“I already started,” Taako said, pointing to the kitchen, where some ingredients and a bowl laid atop the table._

_Lup sat down with a thud and rested her head on her hands. “I’m sorry, Taako, it’s just…”_

_“This is important to you, I know.”_

_“It was important to Barry.”_

_Silence fell over the dining room._

_Barry Bluejeans died at the age of 84, leaving behind a great amount of scientific achievements, loved friends, and his now widow Lup. They had always known it would end soon, human lives were so short after all! Specially compared to an elf’s. Taako was the only one of their close friends who understood that. Ever since his passing over a year ago Taako had accompanied Lup in her grief; he missed Barry too, but, well, not like Lup did._

_“It’s so fucking unfair he didn’t get to finish this! Barry was so smart, that fucking nerd, remember when he told us he would never get a third Fantasy Nobel and then, fucking boom motherfuckers here comes mister science with a FIFTH one!”_

_Taako scoffed. “Ugh, he never shut up about it after that. ‘Hey, Miller, how many awards you’ve got?!’”_

_Both laughed at that, Lup so hard a couple tears fell from her eyes, or maybe it was just the grief creeping up, but if Taako believed that, he didn’t mention it._

_“So, yeah,” Lup dried her eyes and continued. “Barry didn’t live to finish his research, but I did! I’ve got plenty of time ahead of me, it’s the least I can do.”_

_Taako reached for her hands across the table. “Exactly, there’s more than enough time for that. You don’t need to miss on your free time.”_

_“I know, it’s just… it’s all I have left from him.” Lup looked around the dining room, “There’s our house, of course, and his books, his awards, our room, our bed, all of that. But when I’m not working… I feel lost. Taking on this mission makes me feel like Barry is still with me.”_

_“But he wouldn’t want you to stop living your life for his sake.”_

_Lup squeezed Taako’s hand back. “I know, and I still have my favorite brother to live it with. What would you even do if I wasn’t around to help you clean up your mess?”_

_The twins shared the moment in silence. Lup cried a little more, maybe Taako did too (but if pressed about it he would deny it), all while both finished their dinners. When the last dish was swept clean, Taako spoke up. “So, this is what we are gonna do:” Taako pointed towards the kitchen, “you are going to help me with that cake, tomorrow we’ll go to Merle’s cottage in the middle of nowhere and get shitfaced-”_

_“For Magnus’ sake!”_

_“-for Magnus’ sake, of course, and when that’s done, you can go back to your nerd shit in moderate intervals.”_

_“Like… how moderate?”_

_“Two hours a day.”_

_“No way! I need eighteen at least.”_

_“You still need to eat, shitface!”_

_“We are twins so that makes you a shitface!”_

_“Five hours.”_

_“Twelve!”_

_“Eight, and that’s my last offer.”_

_Lup raised her arms. “Fine, whatever!”_

_The twins shook hands and then worked together on the birthday cake, a fantastic fucking cake, it was Magnus’ sweet sixty after all._

* * *

 

When Taako finally woke up, it was already dark outside. Not that he could tell right away, what with the curtains closed and, oh, that shitty post-nap haze. This is why he hated sleeping, fucking pain in the ass, made his mind get fuzzy, eyes sticky, skin cold, hair a mess, clothes damp-

Wait, why was he damp all over?

Oh. Oh, right.

He ran towards the back hall on the first floor, not falling on the stairs by sheer luck, considering he was still pretty damn groggy. His heart almost fell when he saw the trapdoor on the floor. Fuck, he forgot to hide it, what if Kravitz had gone back inside?

No time to ask questions, he just jumped inside and ran towards the glass door, this time actually falling on the way up the steps, before finally seeing… everything as he left it.

A wave of relief swept over Taako, and he let himself fall to the floor to catch his breath. A couple rosebuds leaned in to check on him. “I’m fine, I just fucked up on my way here. Did anyone else come while I was gone?” The flowers shook in the universal gesture of ‘no’ and Taako sighed. So at least Kravitz had gotten the message.

Ah. Right. Taako had said some pretty mean shit back then didn’t he.

Well, nothing to do about that now. “Cool, cool. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m gonna take a couple minutes to get my shit together.”

Five minutes and all of his shit gathered later, Taako walked around the first floor of the cottage, counting his losses. The entrance was flooded, along with some other rooms on the front of the house. No furniture was damaged by the current but the wallpaper would surely be affected by the saltwater. Eh, whatever. It would take a while to clean up the mess, but Taako was still feeling the after-effects of rising the land. Fucking waste of all his spell slots, at least sleeping surely would have restored them back.

Hm, magic, maybe he could fix some of this with it? Turning water into steam should be a piece of cake. Tako snapped his fingers.

 _Poof!_ And the water was gone. The sand, however, was still intact.

“Oh, you gotta be shitting me.”

Actually, you know what? It was fine, whatever. He sat on a couch and crossed his arms, it was too dark to clean up anyways.

Kravitz was nowhere to be seen, either, but that was to be expected. Taako wouldn’t be surprised if he didn’t see the reaper back again before his actual death. At least he finally got the message, Taako was unkillable! Honestly, good riddance.

… He wouldn’t mind the help right now, though.

_What would you even do if I wasn’t around to help you clean up your mess?_

Taako leaned forward and rested his head on his hands, the memory of Lup’s laugh now fresh on his head. Fucking dreams, what good were they? Just a way for the universe to mess with him.

The last man on the world sat alone in a room.

…

…

…

There was a knock on the door.

* * *

 

On the other side of the rift was a prairie. Or, well, what little was left of it, what with the firestorms that plagued the surface burning everything on their wake and all that. The crow was waiting for Kravitz at the top of a hill, staring into the horizon intently, where the pinkish red sky contrasted with the dead brown.

Kravitz waited for the crow to talk, but he didn’t expect it to do so in Common. “Thank you for coming, Kravitz, I’ve meant to talk to you for a while. But first, I need you to promise not to tell Raven about this conversation.”

All alarms went off on Kravitz’s head. He summoned his scythe and walked a couple steps back. “I don’t know what you want, but I’ll spare you the punishment for plotting against the Raven Queen if you leave now.”

The white crow cackled. “You are so cute, Kravitz, I’m glad that silly old woman has a follower as devoted as you.”

Kravitz was horrified by the rude way this bird was referring to his boss and _goddess_ , but this wasn’t the first time he had heard a deity talk about their fellow gods in such manner. When he finally realized who he was in the presence of, Kravitz turned back to his material form, kneeled down, and stared at the floor in shame. “Istus, please forgive my disrespect.”

The sound of steps preceded the feeling of a hand on Kravitz shoulder. “My dear, you don’t need to kneel before me, I am not your goddess.”

It still felt wrong to stand up though. Kravitz decided he could at least raise his head. In front of him the white crow had been replaced by an old woman with long, silver hair, and a smile as bright as the sun. “What do you need from me? And why must I keep it a secret from the Raven Queen?”

Since Kravitz wasn’t standing up, Istus opted to sit on the floor. Now the both of them could talk eye to eye. “I believe you already have an idea of what it is that I want to talk about.”

Yeah, there weren’t many options these days. “Is this about the survivor?”

“This is about Taako, yes. You can say his name around me, I won’t judge you for using it.”

Kravitz blushed. “I’m sorry, when I talk to the Raven Queen I try to keep my reports professional.”

“Well, this isn’t a work meeting, my dear. Just the two of us talking.”

Just the goddess of fate and the Grim Reaper talking about the last person in the world. Totally casual. Kravitz sighed. “Why did you do it? Why did someone had to survive? And why did it have to be Taako?

“Right to the point, eh?” Istus turned to the horizon again, but when she spoke again, her voice filled the air around them. “For centuries, it has been known that the end of the world would come. You see, Kravitz, this world is imperfect. We created it when we were young and immature. For eons, we’ve loved and cared for it, but it has always been unstable, and we knew that. The things you are seeing now, how the world has turned against itself, this is what it was always meant to be. When we realized the end was near, we tried to stop it, to fix as much as we could so the disasters wouldn’t consume all of the world at once. But, as you can see, we failed.

“So we gave up, and for a while it seemed like the right thing to do. It was agreed to let the people of the world live the last of it in ignorance, so they could at least live to the last of it as true to themselves as possible.

“But we —that is, the ones behind the survival of Taako, didn’t want to let it all go before doing something about it.”

Istus looked back at him and smiled again, but this time there was more to it than just niceness. “What we’ve done, it goes beyond the approval of the pantheon. There has been talk about this in the past, never to be taken seriously. But we believed in our cause, and against all odds, the plan was set in motion.”

Kravitz nodded, “And so, you made Taako survive to prove a point to the rest of the pantheon.”

“It sounds kinda petty when you put it like that, doesn’t it? But I assure you, this decision was not taken lightly. Destiny has great things in store for him.”

It was something both he and the Raven Queen had suspected, but neither of them wanted to acknowledge. If Istus was truly behind Taako’s survival, then it meant he had a mission to fulfill, and Fate itself would make sure he stayed alive until its completion.

So this just made Kravitz work useless. “Then why didn’t you just tell us? If me and the Raven Queen had known you had already claimed his soul for you, we wouldn’t have tried to take it.”

For a fraction of a second, the goddess frowned. Out of thin air she manifested a black feather, one too similar to the ones Kravitz carried with him. “Raven is a good friend of mine, but if I were to confide on her about this, she could get in trouble with the rest of our siblings.”

“I guess I can believe that, but why are you telling _me_ now? I’ve spent the last weeks finding as much as I could about Taako, to at least know how long I’ll have to wait for him to die. If you just had told me you saved him for Destiny’s sake I wouldn’t have wasted so much time on him.” And it may not have been the best way to address a goddess, but Kravitz was getting tired too. He could have spared himself so many troubles, like barging into a garden full of intelligent plant life, for starters. Now Taako was not only still alive, but also pissed at him.

But despite his tone of voice, Istus kept smiling, like she knew it would end up like this. “The world is already so scary, even more if you have to face it alone. I wanted you two to get accustomed to each other before placing the burden of the plan on your shoulders.”

Kravitz was about to retort again when the weight of her words sank in. He replayed them in his mind, but their wasn’t changing. “ _Our_ shoulders? But that doesn’t-”

“You were wrong, by the way. It didn’t chose Taako to play the role of survivor.” And when she grabbed Kravitz’s hand, she was still smiling, a smile that filled Kravitz’s dead body with warmth. “I chose you.”

Kravitz’s eyes went wide, his mouth agape, no words coming out of it for a long moment. He tried to articulate something, anything, but it the end the only word that managed to come out of his mouth was, “Me?”

“Who else could it be? Keeping just one person alive is proving to be harder than we thought, but we need two people to carry the plan to completion. Someone else who could withstand the end of the world. Kravitz, it had to be you!”

Kravitz was speechless. Him? But that couldn’t be. “I already have a mission, and that is to take Taako’s soul to the other side when he dies.”

“And you will do that, when the time comes, but there’s something else that needs to be done before that, something only Taako can do.”

The implications of her words fighted against him. What else could she need from Kravitz? No, he was looking at this from the wrong angle, he needed to go back. If he was to figure out what this was about, Kravitz had to know Taako’s mission, why he kept on surviving against all odds, even the forces of nature.

Oh. Of course. “Was it Pan? The one who chose Taako?” Istus didn’t need to answer, it all made sense now. “It’s the garden, isn’t it? That’s his mission?”

“It is, although he doesn’t think of it as a one.”

Memories played on Kravitz’s mind. The greenhouse was big and crowded, but in no way neglected. Taako had even stopped Kravitz from harming the vines that tried to constrain him. Besides, it was impossible for the god of nature to be unaware of its existence. You couldn’t keep a secret from the gods, but what if one or two of them covered for you.

“So that’s it? Taking care of the garden for Pan? Then what is my part in all of this?”

“That… I cannot tell you just yet.”

Kravitz looked at her, exasperated. “What? Why not?!”

“Because,” she explained, keeping her composure way better than him, “if I were to tell you now, you would refuse.”

That was a red flag when he saw one. “I won’t sacrifice myself for him.”

“I wouldn’t ask that from you.”

“I won’t break the laws of the dead either.”

“And you won’t have to. Your mission will be much simpler than that.”

“Then tell me! What do you want from me? What’s my part in this if not to just wait for Taako to fulfill his destiny.”

Istus was still holding his hand, tracing circles on his skin with her thumb. Kravitz found himself cooling down, and for a moment, he felt a new idea grow inside of him. It was the desire to see the beach again, one last time, that it was the last he saw of this world. It was the same feeling that had invaded him weeks ago, right before…

Before he met Taako.

When he felt at peace again, Istus spoke up. “Two times, Taako will need your help. For one he will tell you what you must do, and for the other he won’t.”

“How will I know?”

“It will be the right thing to do.”

Istus hugged him and the pain from the bruises caused by the vines slowly faded. Then, she stood up again and turned back into a white crow. A rift opened in the air but she did not cross the rift, instead taking flight and losing herself into the horizon.

Kravitz stood there a bit longer, taking in… everything. For now, and probably for a while, all he could do was wait.

He stepped inside the rift…

* * *

 

… And he was back on the island. On this part of the world, the sky was already dark, and the horizon lost itself against the dark, calm sea.

Kravitz considered leaving again, maybe spend the night on the astral plane to clear his mind, but finally decided on knocking the door and hoping for the best.

In the seconds that followed: the sound of footsteps, something crashing, something breaking, someone yelling “SHIT!”, more footsteps, and finally Taako opening the door. “Hey there, handsome,” the elf said, leaning on the doorframe with his hair, clothes and makeup still messed up by the wave.

On his part, Kravitz was still wearing the suit that Taako’s living garden had tore on the legs and arms, so he couldn’t really judge. “Hi, uh, I just wanted to check on-”

“Me? Always the gentleman, Krav, coming back after taking a boy to bed.”

“… I was going to say ‘your house’, but I guess I did enter your room without your consent.”

Taako scoffed. “Krav, what did I tell you? You are always allowed inside my room.”

Kravitz cleared his throat. “You did, yeah, but that was before…” Before breaking into the house, Taako calling him out on it, and pretty much telling Kravitz to go fuck himself.

Right. That.

They stood awkwardly in silence, and that was the end of it, no one ever talked to the other until Taako died hundreds of years later.

Nah, just kidding. “Just come inside already, it’s freezing.”

Kravitz followed Taako inside, closing the door behind him. The place didn’t look as bad as he expected, at least the water had dried up already; there was a weird amount of sand on the floor, but he didn’t mention it. When he finally reached Taako at the dining room, he had already put two cups on the table and was now boiling water with magic.

When Taako noticed the way Kravitz was looking, he said, “I’m not waiting five more minutes of awkward silence.”

“Fair enough,” Kravitz said, sitting down, and then made himself some coffee.

Both drank at the same time. It was like the warmth of their drinks took a great deal of the tension away, and after that sip, gulp, and _ahh_ , they could stare at each other without fear. It was amazing the kind of power such little joys in life could have.

But, yeah, there was still a lot to talk about. Kravitz cleared his throat and Taako sighed.

“I’m sorry that I…”

“I shouldn’t have said…”

They laughed awkwardly. Kravitz said, “You go first?”

Taako rolled his eyes, “Oh, sure, leave the hardest part to me,” but he still took the offer, and so he began: “Listen, I was… really pissed when I saw you inside my garden. I still am, kinda, and just to be clear I still want you to stay the fuck away from that hall.”

Kravitz raised his hands in a gesture of peace. “It’s fine, I totally get it.”

“You better do, because next time I see you poking your nose where it doesn’t belong…” Taako catched himself raising his voice and immediately cut himself off. “Sorry, I shouldn’t lash out on you like- The things I said, earlier today, that was pretty shitty of me,” he glanced to the side, “ and I _miiiiight_ have been projecting some stuff on you.”

Yeah, Kravitz had figured so. He lowered his hands on the table again, waiting for Taako to get himself together.

Taako took a sip of his tea and licked his lips, thinking about the best way to convey his thoughts. “Those guys- I mean, the plants, they are not people, I guess? But still, they are all I have left from my past life.”

Kravitz nodded. “You mean as a chef?”

“More like as a person with friends who are not dead.”

Oh.

Kravitz took another sip of his coffee. If he was awkward before, now he just felt like a total jerk.

Taako was holding his cup on both hands, staring down at it while tapping with one finger. “I survived the apocalypse and they sent you here to hunt my ass down, but that garden? It’s not even supposed to exist.”

A lot had changed in the past hours, both for Kravitz and Taako, and even between the two of them. Kravitz was still coming to terms with what Istus had told him just an hour ago.

Taako had a mission… and so did he. Whatever that meant.

But he could still tell the Raven Queen about his findings, end this once and for ever.

What was he going to do?

_You will know because it will be the right thing to do._

It was a start.

“I won’t tell.”

Taako faced him again, surprised. “What did you say?”

“I mean, the garden. I’ll keep the secret. I won’t tell my boss about it.”

But Taako, far from relieved, stared at him with suspicion. “How do I know you are telling the truth?”

“You don’t, or at least not until some other god sends for their servants to take it away.” Kravitz thought about the next part carefully, how much was he allowed to tell Taako, if neither Istus nor Pan had done so before? But it didn’t feel right to hide at least that part from him. “However, I believe Pan must be aware of it already, if he can feel plant life the way I feel souls.”

Taako leaned back on his chair and crossed his arms. “Pf, I knew that already, it’s a pannist garden.”

“Right, this place used to belong to one of his clerics.”

“Mhm,” Taako leaned forward again and eyed Kravitz, not ever blinking once. It was a powerful glare, Kravitz admitted. “Why are you doing this?”

 _The goddess of Destiny dropped a bomb on me like an hour ago, turns out you can’t die yet and everything I’ve done is meaningless._ Maybe that would speed things up? Or maybe, knowing Taako, finding about his mission would only make him postpone his own destiny until the end of his days, just to spite Kravitz even more. It wasn’t worth the risk.

And, also… Kravitz still owed him an apology. “Because I’ve been acting like an asshole, too. I’m sorry, Taako, you invited me over, even after I admitted I was after your soul, and I overstepped my boundaries. Keeping others from breaking them is the least I can do.”

Taako’s glare lost some of its intensity, and for a second it even seemed relieved. He finally closed his eyes and sighed. “I guess I’ll have to believe you for now. And,” he opened his eyes, his look was softer, ”apology accepted.”

“You too,” said Kravitz.

“And,” Taako breathed in, then out, clearly making an effort to say whatever was coming next: “thank you for coming back.”

Kravitz felt his face heat up a little. “Oh! Well, you know, it’s the least I could do after-”

“Because I’m going to need all the help I can get to clean this shit,” Taako added as fast as he could. “Which, is you, by the way. You are the only help left in the world.”

“Ha, right,” Kravitz looked around. At least the dinning room seemed to be in better shape than the front, but there was still all the waste the wave brought with it. “Thank you for having me back, too.”

Taako winked. “You know I can’t resist a pretty face,” he picked his cup and Kravitz’s and walked towards the kitchen. “Let’s get to work then. The sooner this is done, the sooner I’ll have your bean juice ready.”

Kravitz had followed him with the kettle pot, tea and coffee, and at first he didn’t catch the meaning of Taako’s cryptic wording, but when it hit… “Wait, you mean the vanilla?”

“Duh, what do you think I was doing flirting with a literal vanilla vine this morning?”

“You were… what? Did you say… _what_?”

“Oh my god, why do we always have to talk about this shit in the fucking kitchen.” Taako set the cups down and covered his face with one hand. “Okay. Fine. Listen. You are a big boy, you’ve seen some shit, right? It’s time you learn about pannist gardens.”

The first part sounded nonsensical, plants that came “alive” by the power of Pan? If Kravitz hadn’t seen it himself he would’ve taken Taako for a madman. Aside from regular plant food like sunlight, water and manure, pannist gardens needed constant reassurance to live. Coming from the followers of the god of nature, Kravitz guessed that made sense? You took care of your garden showing appreciation, and…

The last part. That had to be a fucking joke.

“That has to be a fucking joke.”

Taako glared at him. “Do I look like I’m joking, Kravitz? Do I look like I find this funny?” He really didn’t look like it.

Kravitz was stunned. “Oh my goddess. But it… it _touched_ me.”

“It’s not like _that_ all the time, those were actually trying to kill you,” that… made Kravitz feel better, weirdly enough. “And honestly, you just go to that extreme when you are in a hurry and need them to do shit for you, like growing fruit out of season.”

“I… I don’t think I want that vanilla extract anymore.”

Taako pointed at him. “No fucking way you are quitting now!”

“I can’t just have some knowing this, what the fuck! Isn’t vanilla supposed to be, you know, _vanilla_?!”

“Okay, first of all, that’s racist. Second of all, I consented to it! It’s not like I don’t want some of that sweet bean juice for myself, every time I try to synthesize something that’s in the garden Pan spoils it because it’s cheating.”

Hey there, another mystery solved, that was totally the time to think about it.

Kravitz had reached a point where he either got used to this level of insanity or went mad himself. What a fucking day.

Taako washed the few dishes and dried his hands on a towel before turning back to Kravitz. “Everything okay up there? If you are still in shock we can do this tomorrow.”

Kravitz sighed. “No, yeah, I’m fine. Whatever. I’ve already learned so much shit today I think it just stopped affecting me.”

“Good,” Taako started walking, and he hadn’t even made it all the way out of the kitchen before saying: “and since we are in the mood for life revelations, vore is a fetish where people cannibalize each other for sexual pleasure. Now stop using that word all the time.”

Yeah, that thing about getting used to this? Never fucking mind. “HOW DOES THAT EVEN WORK?!”

But Taako was already out of the kitchen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you can punch me for that last scene honestly i cornered myself into those jokes and i gotta pay for them
> 
> re: magnus super young compared to barry. i based the age gap on their time at the IPRE, and then added some more years because sweet sixty, thats a pun i gotta make. do you think elves actually have a sweet sixty? or maybe in the twin's case its a cincuentañera?  
> (also my latinx pals did you catch that football reference? eh? eh?)


	6. Listening, part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kravitz looks for a new approach.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, major character death. I mean, everyone? You already knew that, but we are actually acknowledging them today. These only act as context for some events in Taako's life so if you don't want to deal with that you can skip it (all italic scenes).

_Two times, Taako will need your help. For one he will tell you what you must do, and for the other he won’t._

Kravitz had taken Istus’ words to heart, and was now trying to be as useful to Taako as he could, offering his help at the minimum show of distress. With time, the elf had begun to trust him enough to ask Kravitz for help here and there. None of these tasks had a Destiny feel to them, but at least, when the time came, Kravitz would be prepared.

But Taako was really putting his good will to test.

Kravitz couldn’t believe he had agreed to this.

“I can’t believe you are going to do it in _that._ ”

“The suit is part of my corporeal form.”

“Wait, really?”

“Of course not.”

“Good, because you are probably going to sweat all over it… I mean, if you can sweat? I really don’t understand how that hot bod of yours works. ”

“Tell me again why you need my help with this?”

“Oh, you know… It’s more fun if I make you bite the dust!”

Taako ran for it, leaving Kravitz behind.

“Hey!” Kravitz followed him as fast as he could. “That’s cheating!”

“All’s fair in morning jogs!”

Wasn’t the point of morning jogs to keep the body healthy? Running at full speed right at the beginning didn’t seem like the sensible thing to do. But, eh, what did Kravitz know? It wasn’t like his body needed to be taken care of on the first place.

And actually, now that he thought about it, he didn’t really have a cap on his stamina either. He pressed forward and passed Taako in a matter of seconds. “See you at the finish line, then!”

“What?! Oh, you and your undead constitution!”

“All’s fair in morn- Uf!” following the spirit of competition, Taako pounced him, then quickly got back up and ran even faster along the shoreline.

The rest of the friendly morning jog went about in a similar fashion.

Taako reached the finish line first, arms in the air, screaming at the top of his lungs about how cool he was. His little victory lasted a good ten seconds before he fell to the ground and stayed there, laughing at Kravitz in between gasps. And Kravitz? Just peachy, except that his suit was now dirty all over. “I hope you are proud.”

“Come on-,” gasp, “what’s-,” gasp, “a little dust-,” gasp, then coughing. “Oh my god, I’m dying.”

Kravitz tried to get the sand off his suit, but since most of it was still wet, the only civilized option he had left was rematerializing. So bothersome, why did living creatures dwell around dirt, anyway? He flicked into his astral form and then back, good as new. “There, much better.” He turned to Taako again, “I’m sorry, you were saying?”

Taako was sitting now, and he looked at Kravitz with an strange expression. “Uh, nothing important, I guess?”

Did Kravitz miss on something? But Taako was already getting up again, dusting himself off and beginning his stretch routine. Kravitz didn’t join him for this, but he stayed to chat and watch.

* * *

 

_The tres horny boys sat at a mediocre bar, drinking beer so bad the only way to get over the taste was to drink more, until the alcohol did the job of numbing their senses._

_“Gah! I can’t take any more of this shit!,” exclaimed Merle, sober enough to still feel everything around him with only a thin layer of haziness._

_“What good is that dwarven resilience of yours now?!,” Magnus laughed and drank some more._

_“Careful there, grandpa. Don’t wanna melt that worn out liver of yours!”_

_“Don’t call me that! I’m still the sweet baby boy of the group!” And the other two laughed, because there was no way for that not to be funny coming from an old man like Magnus._

_But it was true, Magnus had long since joined the club of people who dreaded long sets of stairs and the cold weather. Taako had a reputation to maintain, and tailoring two old farts who only liked to complain about the youth these days wasn’t doing him any good. If these two hadn’t happen to be his best friends he would’ve ditched them long ago, but at least they still knew how to party._

_They called for another round of that shitty beer, to Merle’s disgrace, who at least seemed to be getting closer to his first stage of drunkenness. Taako was around his… fifth? Far enough to feel like standing over the table but not enough to do so shirtless (yet). And Magnus was probably around…_

_Oh, no, Magnus’s fifth was the sentimental one._

_“Guys, I love you so much…”_

_“Oh, bother…” Merle dragged his stool closer to the big guy. “Yeah, we know.”_

_Taako put a hand on Magnus shoulder. “We are your best friends, and you are our best friend too, etcetera, etcetera.”_

_“It’s just that… I don’t have much time left, you know?”_

_Merle and Taako eyed each other with a look that said,_ Yeah, I’ve thought about it too.

_But just because you knew something was coming, it didn’t mean you were prepared, especially when it was, well, death. Taako himself had already decided on spending the rest of their time as the three of them as carelessly as possible, for Magnus’ sake, but the big guy was all about emotions and shit. If he wanted to talk about it, the least they could do was listen, as uncomfortable as it was._

_“I’ve had a great time, and I really wish I was born as something else that would’ve let me spend even more with you guys.”_

_Merle sniffed. “I mean, longevity is overrated.”_

_“Yeah, you are lucky you didn’t have to deal thirty years of puberty.”_

_“No, I mean, it’s fine, I lived a good life, but what will you guys do when I’m not around?”_

_“Throw away all those damn wooden ducks, for starters,” said Taako._

_“Hey!”_

_“And the oolong tea,” chimed in Merle, “I just keep it around because you like it, but honestly? It’s disgusting.”_

_“Now,_ hold on. _”_

_“Ha, you know what else? The dog hair! We’ll finally be free of Magnus leaving fluff over everything he touches.”_

_“Well, that’s…” Magnus paused, then smiled. Wicked. “Actually, speaking of my dogs, there’s one thing I needed to ask you guys…”_

_Merle and Taako looked at him, first quizzically, then in horror._

_“Not it!” said Merle._

_“Not it- Fuck!” yelled Taako, a fraction of a second late. “What the hell, man! Your house is bigger!”_

_“Yeah, and older! Fragile! Full of breakable shit!”_

_“Well, mine is full of expensive shit! Come on!”_

_“You two talk like my boys are some kind of menace sent to destroy everything you own.”_

_“Pretty much, yeah!” Said both._

_Magnus laughed. “I’m fucking with you. I talked to Ango, he’s already agreed to take care of them.”_

_The other two, totally not about to fist fight, let go of each other and sighed in relief._

_Merle downed what was left of his drink, “Can’t believe I’m about to say this, but Pan bless that kid.” Said kid was over fifty now, and insisted they stopped calling him that, especially in front of his grandchildren._

_“But,” Magnus leaned over the table and whispered, which was a really stupid thing to do inside a bar full of screaming patrons, but as it was established before, he was really fucking drunk, “I do want to ask you something of you.”_

* * *

 

Two days after the flood and the house was looking as good as ever. Some damage would be permanent, like the wallpaper, but Taako said he had a plan to fix that.

“A little to the right.”

Kravitz moved the desk as told. “No, no, too far off. Left now, please.” Again, Kravitz moved the desk. “You are getting there, you are getting there, you are… right there!” And Kravitz let it fall in front of a section where the wallpaper had been torn by Taako the day before, covering most of the wall. “There, and none’ll be the wiser.”

Kravitz kept any comments about how ‘fixing’ and ‘hiding’ were not the same thing. At least they wouldn’t have visits over anytime soon. “The furniture in this house is pretty sturdy,” he said instead.

Taako dusted his hands off, as if he had done some actual physical work. “I know, right?” He knocked on the desk it a couple times, “These are good stuff, taylor made by an old friend.”

Oh? Friend talk? Kravitz approached the desk and inspected its rustic finish. “Another inheritance?”

“Kinda. Hm, actually, it’s a funny story.”

Kravitz looked at Taako expectantly. These moments were rare, Taako was still wary about sharing any details about the people of his life in case Kravitz wanted to use them as bait. Maybe he could do that, if Kravitz put his mind to it. Finding people on the astral plane wasn’t hard if you had the contacts. But, yeah, no messing with fate and all that. It was hard not to think about it, though.

“So, before he died, he asked me and another friend to give the last of his work away among his town. He was kind of a folk hero of sorts there, people loved him, so we thought getting rid of all that would be a piece of cake.”

Kravitz nodded, he was getting an idea to where this was going. “Didn’t go as planned?”

“Dude, I shit you not, _nobody_ wanted it!” Taako raised his arms in exasperation. “Most of them had already commissioned him an his people pretty much everything on their houses! There just wasn’t space for them! We managed to give some to charity and shit, but we had to keep the rest to ourselves.”

Kravitz pictured Taako and his unnamed, faceless group of friends, surrounded by a jungle of furniture without any clue as to what to do with it, like someone who gets lost in Fantasy Ikea. He had a couple cases like that, actually, that cause of death was more common than one would thought. “Well, it still sounds like a good deal. This is the furniture that survived the apocalypse.”

Taako hummed in agreement. “I’m made of rougher stuff, though.”

“I don’t doubt it.”

“Oh? No retaliation this time? You are losing your spark, Krav.”

Kravitz raised an eyebrow at that. “I saw you raise the land in the middle of a tsunami.”

“Pff, that? It was a piece of cake.”

And then again, Kravitz would have pointed out how he fainted immediately after that, but he really didn’t feel like arguing Taako’s resilience at the moment. “Speaking of, isn’t about teatime?”

Taako eyed him with that unreadable expression again. It unsettled Kravitz, what was with that? Did he still feel angry at him for the green room incident?

“Hey, weren’t you supposed to have dropped that British nonsense?”

Ah, right, that. Kravitz laughed. “I firmly believe that some customs should be universal.”

Taako rolled his eyes. “Yeah, when it’s convenient for you. No dessert before dinner, and we just had lunch an hour ago.”

“Aw, come on!”

“Nope, get back to work. There’s an ugly patch of wall on the next room and-”

Slam! One of the windows they left open swinged on its hinges and hit the wall. Taako let out a little yelp and Kravitz materialized his scythe. Nothing else happened.

They stared at eachother and laughed awkwardly.

“The wind gets strong this time of the year.”

“Yeah, I figured.”

For good measure, Taako closed all the windows in the house. It was getting cold, anyway.

* * *

 

Finally, later that week, the real tea time was about to get special.

Taako poured hot water on two cups, adding coffee powder and stirring. “Here it comes, are you ready?”

Kravitz nodded, “I died ready.”

“That’s… an interesting choice of words.” He held the small bottle of extract and handed it to Kravitz. “Would you do the honors?”

“With pleasure,” Kravitz was about to pour the vanilla. He raised the bottle with care, as if it was the most important task in the world. If Istus manifested herself at that very moment just to tell him that, yes, that was their mission, to make the last vanilla flavored coffee in the world, he could have retired peacefully, knowing his last months hadn’t been in vain. Vine. Ha ha.

“Are you seriously having an internal monologue right now?”

“No,” Kravitz lied.

“Then just pour the damn bean juice already.”

So Kravitz poured the bean juice on the bean water. Both stirred their own cups at the same time, and took a sip. The bitter taste of the coffee mixed with the sweetness of the vanilla was… exactly what you would expect.

Taako looked down at his cup, not impressed. “This is coffee with a shot of vanilla, alright. Well, Krav, I hope all my effort was worth… something.”

Kravitz was beaming.

“It’s perfect!” he exclaimed, then laughed at his own outburst. “Sorry, I wasn’t expecting it to taste exactly as I remembered,” Kravitz took another long sip, even going as far as licking his lips after this time. And it was true, the coffee was nothing out of this world, compared to everything else in Taako’s menu it could even be considered mediocre. But after everything they had to go through to make it (specially Taako), having this little piece of normal was just more than he expected, or could have even asked. “Thank you, Taako, I couldn’t be happier.”

Taako smiled smugly and tried to play it cool, not aware that he was blushing to the tip of his ears. “Pff, I mean, this was nothing, you know? Next time ask for something a little harder so we can have more fun.”

“Like what? Meat?”

“I said harder, not downright impossible. And don’t you think I forgot we haven’t figured your _real_ favorite meal, from when you actually _ate_ daily.”

Kravitz was going to retort, when suddenly everything began to move, and then-

_Crash!_

A glass that someone had left near the border of the counter fell. The walls kept shaking, the making sounds they weren’t supposed to make. It was another earthquake, one even stronger than the last one.

Taako stood up quickly and secured the bottle of vanilla first thing. “Under the table!”

Kravitz followed him, not really sure why, it wasn’t like he ran any risks staying around. The table was big and sturdy, strong enough to hold anything that fell on top of it, as long as it wasn’t, well, the entire house.

The sounds of crashing just kept coming from every direction, another minute that felt like an eternity went by…

Until, slowly, everything went back to normal.

At some point, Taako had grabbed onto Kravitz’s arm. He didn't let go right away. “You know, I kinda like this. We should have dinner down here from now on.”

“Is being on your knees under a table your idea of a nice dinner?”

Taako winked. Kravitz didn’t actually see him do it but he just knew. “I usually get on my knees after dinner, but I’m always open for trying new things.”

Kravitz laughed. Okay, that was on him, he should have worded himself better. Taako wasn’t letting go yet, and Kravitz found he didn’t mind it either.

 _I mean, you already know this is out of your hands now_ , a little voice inside his head said. _Death will come when Destiny rules for it, no matter what you do. Better kill time in a way that both of you can enjoy._

But before Kravitz could even argue with himself over it, Taako was standing up. “Welp, time to fight against the forces of nature.”

The land. Right. Kravitz stood up too, “Do you need help with that?”

“Nah, I’m fine. I mean, if I don’t come back in ten minutes assume I passed out and go fetch my useless body. In the meantime, could you please check around for any broken shit? Don’t throw anything, though, just tell me so I can fix it later.”

Kravitz nodded, “Sure.”

Two minutes later, there was another, softer tremor, this time caused by Taako’s magic. He was back five minutes later, still on his feet but visibly tired, so Kravitz helped him get to his room. Right before throwing himself on the bed, Taako whispered, “Sorry, no dinner today.”

“It’s fine, I’m good with the coffee.”

Taako smiled against the pillow. “I’m glad.”

* * *

 

_“It’s fucking freezing in here,” Taako said, covered in at least six layers of clothing. But let it be known he still looked amazing. “How can you dress like that?”_

_Lup, who was wearing a skirt and a thin sweater, just shrugged. “Heat magic?”_

_“Didn’t you run out of spells carrying all this furniture?”_

_“You should always save one slot in times of need. And I’m strong, it’s not like I can’t carry a couple chairs and tables on my own.”_

_“Listen to you, talking like a fucking loser. No respectable wizard should ever carry anything ever.”_

_Lucretia’s head peaked out from behind the wall on the next side of the cottage. “I don’t doubt you two have better things to do, but none of us want to stay out here any more than you do.”_

_Taako sighed “Whatever, I guess I can help you move some more shit around.” He walked with Lup towards a set of chairs lying around, which Lucretia, Davenport and Angus were currently moving around, when Merle approached him._

_“Ah, Taako, you can leave that there, I need you to come with me to the garden for a sec.”_

_The elf’s ears dropped. “Ugh, no, no fucking way I’m going back in there, least of all with_ you _.”_

_“Come on! I really need the extra hands,” Merle winked at him. “And they like you!”_

_“OH, YOU DON’T SAY! THAT’S EXACTLY MY PROBLEM.”_

_Lup’s obnoxious laugh came from behind them. “Come on, Taako! They must miss you so much!”_

_Merle nodded. “They do, actually. Keep bringing you up from time to time.”_

_Taako crossed his arms. “Nuh-uh, I’m not moving from here.”_

_“The greenhouse is warmer, too.”_

_Fuck, that actually sounded nice. “Fine. But don’t you start with your weird shit when I’m around.”_

_“I’ll behave, promise. Now, can we get going?” He turned towards the rest, “Oh, and when you are done here come inside. We’ll take some time before dinner is ready, but at least is warm. I really wasn’t expecting this cold weather today.”_

_“You should have asked Lup, she’s been rambling on and on about weather patterns since…” Taako thought it over for a couple seconds. “Well, since she took on her research. You know, all that nerd shit.”_

_“Hm. I’ll remember to ask her next time I have you guys over. Now, come on! The flowers are waiting!”_

_“UGH.”_

* * *

 

Taako woke up to the smell of fire. His first instinct was to curse, ”Lup, for fuck’s sake-”

But he wasn’t in his room from back then. This was Merle’s house, Lup was gone, and he was alone.

… No, wait, he wasn’t alone anymore, and what the fuck was that smell?

He walked downstairs to find Kravitz desperately trying to save the burning kitchen, but that wasn’t the most shocking part of it all. His jacket was gone now, probably vanished into the shadow realm where he came from, and his shirt was covered instead with one of Taako’s aprons.

Taako smirked. “Am I still dreaming?”

Kravitz looked at him with eyes wide, absolutely embarrassed. “I’m…” another flame burst up and he had to go back to putting it down. “Shit, I am _so sorry_! This wasn’t supposed to happen!”

There was no helping the laughing fit that came over Taako. “No, Krav, don’t apologize.” His words were reassuring but his tone was mocking. A flick of his hand and the fire was extinguished, but Kravitz’s pride? Forever burned. “There you go, good thing my spell slots are restored.”

Kravitz dropped the cloth he had been using to keep the fire down into the sink and sighed. “I guess I should leave the cooking to you.”

Taako walked to the stove. The pot was fine, even if its contents were useless now. “Aw, Krav, if you were hungry you could’ve woken me up,” _And spare me those awful dreams_ , he thought.

“I’m not- You know I don’t get hungry!” Taako smirked again, ready to counter that argument with how Kravitz always seemed so eager to try his food, but the reaper kept talking. “I figured _you_ would be after, raising the land again. Last time it drained you pretty badly.”

He was… What? “Holy shit, I really am dreaming.”

Kravitz covered his face with one hand. “Would you cut that? I’m serious.”

“You wanted to _cook_ , for _me_ , after I defeated death and the forces of nature for the nth time! You are even wearing an apron!”

Kravitz blushed. “I didn’t want to stain my suit.”

“Oh my god!” Taako was back at laughing again. No, but really, what a fucking way to wake up. “Krav, you seriously are something else! What’s with you lately, being so nice and helpful with me?”

Kravitz tensed up. It was only for a second but Taako noticed. Huh.

“Say, tho,” Taako began, things were about to get pretty interesting, “what’s your deal?”

He smiled in a way that would have passed for embarrassed to someone who didn’t know better. But Taako knew a calculated expression when he saw one. “What, can’t I be a nice guest for once? I just feel guilty I’ve been using up your space and resources for two months now.”

“It goes beyond being a good guest, doesn’t it? Always checking on me, offering your help, doing anything I ask without complaining. It’s a bit suspicious, if you ask me.”

Kravitz had stopped breathing altogether, he kept doing that whenever he didn’t want Taako to read his reactions. He thought he could just erase all of his quirks when in fact it was that erasing that gave him away, it was a quirk on itself. He _was_ hiding something.

“Why, Kravitz? Could it be?” Taako got closer just to see him try and fake a plausible reaction to that, but his face remained the same. “Are you falling in love with me?”

Kravitz, slowly, breathed in once again. Not that, then. Pity..

“You don’t give up on that, do you?,” Kravitz said, exasperated.

“I know the effect I have on people, handsome,” and he thought, why not, adding some bait in there too. “I’m to _die_ for.”

“What you are,” said Kravitz, “is full of yourself.”

Bait ignored. Really? _Again?_

Taako was glad he had actual experience with bluff checks, because _fuuuuck_ , he could scream right now. “Whatever you say, my man. Now get out of my kitchen, because I am kind of starving right now and I need to make something before my stomach eats itself.”

Kravitz recovered from his defensive stance and uncrossed his arms, looking concerned and a little embarrassed still. At least that was genuine as far as Taako could tell. “Wait, I still have to clean up-”

“Krav, no offense, but I fear for the integrity of my kitchen right now. If you want to compensate, make me some more of that double beam water, I’m still feeling a little down.”

Kravitz finally gave up and followed Taako’s instructions without even arguing.

Once he had been left alone in the kitchen, Taako sighed.

What was Kravitz up to? He had stopped his threatening all of a sudden, trying to earn Taako’s trust with small favors, just being… like a fake version of himself.

It all had changed the day Taako first raised the land in front of Kravitz, he wasn’t scared of him, was he?

That was also the day Kravitz had entered the garden. Maybe he had lied and was actually waiting for a chance to get inside again.

Which was it?

Taako looked out the window, but of course it was too dark to see anything. The sea had already retreated by the time Taako made it out of the house, so he didn’t really have a chance to see the wave act up. There was something about that too. Nothing behaved the way it should anymore.

He needed to do something.

* * *

 

_With the passing of the years, Angus got better at sneaking behind people. The key was observation, most of his skills were based on that. You had to keep an eye on your target, wait until they were focused on something, so they didn’t pay attention to the ridiculously shredded professor walking past them. In short, Angus McDonald grew up to become an even bigger menace. “Sir!”_

_“HOLY SHIT!” Taako almost jumped out of his skin. He stared daggers at the man, “Fuck’s sake, kid, you gotta cut that sneaky shit!”_

_Angus raised an eyebrow. “Sorry, sir, it’s just that it always seems like you run away when you see me coming.”_

_“I don’t know what you are talking about,” he lied._

_“Well, I’ll stop sneaking around when you stop calling me kid. I do look way older than you, now.”_

_“Don’t mistake ‘older’ with ‘uglier’, Ango. I am a wise two-hundred and twenty years old elf who just so happens to look like a TV star.”_

_“What’s TV again?”_

_“Anyway, what in the world is a respectable scholar like you doing in a place like this?”_

_They were in one of the shadier places of town: the farmer’s market. People yelled from one end of the street to the other, offering a variety of fresh products for the most exigent clientele. Also, most of the clerks were ex-convicts. It was part of a new rehabilitation program._

_“Oh, I’m on a case right now. My client thinks one of their fellow vendors is dumping urine all over his apples.”_

_Taako was about to pick a red delicious, but he changed his mind. “I see. You never take a break, huh? How does that old body of yours tolerate the exhaustion?”_

_Angus smiled. “You know me, can’t say no to a new mission! Which reminds me, how is Mrs. Lup doing with hers?”_

_Taako scoffed. “Don’t talk to me about that traitor, she left four days ago to do research on a fucking desert.”_

_“Woah, that sounds fun! What was she working on again? A study on climate change?”_

_“Honestly, I don’t know anymore!” Taako said, exasperated. “I think it used to be about that, but lately she’s been rambling about all sorts of shit, from earthquakes to mass extinctions. I think she wants to solve every scientific mystery on Faerun now, but she keeps referring to it as ‘Barry’s legacy’.”_

_“Well, she loved him.”_

_“Yeah, she did.”_

_As they walked, Angus spotted a bank on the sidewalk and signaled Taako to go there with him. He was as cheerful as ever, but there was so much physical activity an old man like him could take. “I think I understand her, though. When the people we love leave us, we try to live up to their memories. My house hasn’t been free of dog hair ever since mister Magnus asked me to take care of his boys. Now I have their grandchildren! Or is it grandpuppies? Anyway, I bet miss Lup is just doing what she thinks would make Barry proud.”_

_“I know that, but…” he sighed. “I get worried, you know?”_

_“I know, sir.”_

_They sat in silence for a while, looking at people pass by, Angus watching the vendors with an added interest thanks to his current case._

_“Sir, I know you care about me.”_

_“Where did you get that idea?”_

_“Call it a detective’s instinct.” Taako scoffed, but Angus knew he didn’t mean it. “You’ve been affected by Mr. Barry and Mr. Magnus’ deaths, and I know you’ll be too when I-”_

_“Don’t talk about that, geez, you aren’t even sixty yet.”_

_“What I mean is, it’s okay, it’s another part of life. Whenever I see a dog on the street I pet it, because that’s what Mr. Magnus would have wanted.”_

_Taako didn’t say anything. He didn’t want to think, either. Well, he was an elf, he should have been used to losing people. He told himself it was part of befriending humans, and gnomes, even dwarves, it was no different from adopting a pet only to watch it die ten years later._

_“I know you can get lonely sometimes, but you still have me, and I guess you’ll do for a while. But, when I’m not around anymore, and you feel like living up to my memory, get a mystery to solve! Anything you think might interest me, and find the answer. That way, whenever you do, it would be like I’m there with you too!”_

_Taako sighed. “I think you just want to be a pain in my ass, even from beyond the grave.”_

_But Angus knew that the key to being a good detective was observation, and right know he could see what Taako felt. It was more than enough to him._


	7. Listening, part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Taako and Kravitz go on a dangerous date.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just enjoy this one, is fun

_The S. S. Starblaster was currently anchored outside Davenport’s house, swinging with the waves like it wanted to go with them._

_“There’s something just wrong about this,” Davenport was in bed, looking at it from the window of his room. “After all the adventures we had, the foreign ports, places no sane creature would even come close to, seeing it like that is like an insult to its very nature,” Davenport sighed. “The Starblaster needs me.”_

_“You can still opt for a viking funeral,” said Lup, half jokingly. “I mean, you got the boat, I’ve got the fire, and the sea’s right there.”_

_Taako figured he should play the straight man, for once. Merle wasn’t around at the moment and Lucretia had just excused herself, most likely to cry in private. “No fucking way, that boat belongs to all of us! I already called dibs.”_

_“And where, pray tell, are you going to keep it? We live on the fucking mountains.”_

_Davenport laughed weakly._

_“I’ll cast levitate on it, it’s like buying the house a balloon.”_

_“A balloon you have to charm every hour for the rest of your life.”_

_“The aesthetic is worth it.”_

_The twins kept arguing until Davenport’s laughs turned into a coughing fit. Taako poured another glass of water while Lup helped him sit up on the bed. “Thank you, thank you. I’ll give it to you, Lup, that does sound pretty cool. We could go out together! I’m starting to regret that my last journey ever will be that trip to the grocery store last week. It could have been the shark island, but noooo, I was too lazy to walk ten minutes down the shore. Burning my way to heaven sounds fucking radical.”_

_Taako crossed his arms. “Well, everything does when you put it like_ that. _”_

_Lup stuck out her tongue. “I told you! Besides, it’s the perfect time! There’s going to be an storm in a couple days. If you can hang on by then we can arrange something epic!”_

_Taako looked out the window. It was a beautiful day outside. “A storm? What are you talking about?  And don’t tell people when to die, you insensitive prick!”_

_“You are the insensitive prick, denying this poor man his last wish.”_

_“Guys,” Davenport scolded them, “please don’t fight over me.”_

_“Sorry, cap'n-port,” said the twins in unison._

_“Besides, I wasn’t done.” He left the glass of water on the drawer next to him and stared out the window again, looking at the boat with the love only a man of the sea could understand. “The Starblaster was made to stay afloat, there’s many more adventures waiting out there.” He looked at the twins now, “Can I ask something of you? Take it somewhere nice once in awhile. It doesn’t need to be dangerous or even interesting, the grocery store a mile away is fine. But don’t let it stay put in the same place for too long, it deserves the sea.”_

_Lup and Taako looked at each other, then at Davenport, and nodded._

_Davenport smiled, “I knew I could count on you. Now, would you please let me and Lucretia have a minute? She won’t cry in front of you, you know how she gets.”_

* * *

 

_“You sound better, Kravitz. I was worried the earthquake incident had broken your spirit.”_

Kravitz told the Raven Queen about the end result of that as soon as he got a moment to spare. Not that it wasn’t obvious when Kravitz didn’t show up with Taako’s soul after saying he would.

He had kept the garden’s existence a secret since then, as well as his and Istus’ conversation —not without an immense amount of guilt—, but he still owed his goddess at least as much as an update on his own situation.

So the weeks that followed were… nice, if Kravitz was being honest.

The weight of Istus’ words lingered over him still, and whenever he lowered his guard they came back, clear as if he had just heard them.

But most of the time he embraced the quiet lifestyle of the island. Or, well, as quiet as it could be with Taako around demanding his attention from time to time. But he didn’t mind that as much as he did at first.

Now, a couple sundays after, he was kneeling once again miles away from the island while Taako took care of the garden. Kravitz didn’t have much to say, but he felt different too. The thing was that, “You were right, my goddess. After seeing the survivor outlive a natural disaster with my own eyes, I couldn’t keep on stressing over it. It’s clearly out of my hands.” For now, at least.

_“I’m glad to hear that. But you mustn’t lose hope either, one day he will run out of luck.”_

“And I will be there when it happens, but I think it’ll be a while still.”

_“Now I’m worried you’ll get too bored.”_

Hm, how could he put it? “I think you misunderstood, my goddess. Just because I’m taking it easy doesn’t mean the survivor does.”

The Raven Queen cooed. _“Oh? Why is that?”_

Just thinking about the last of their adventures made him feel exhausted again. “You know mortals, they just can’t stay put.”

* * *

 

A couple days ago, Taako asked something unusual from Kravitz.

“Hop on, Krav, we are going sailing!”

Was this it? He found himself asking that question almost every time Taako asked anything from him. Kravitz just kept saying yes to anything in hopes one of these times would be Istus’ mission. None of them had to do with the garden, Taako wasn’t letting him in just yet, but maybe his mission would be somewhere else, like the sea.

But… did it have to be the sea?

“Are you sure you need my help for this? You seem to be doing fine.”

“I do,” Taako winked, “but it’s a long way and I get bored. Besides, I haven’t been to the mainland in forever now, what if I die out there? Don’t you want to be around when that happens?”

 _It won’t happen, you’ll be fine._ Kravitz really wished he could just tell Taako everything and be done with it. Just be done with it. Like, in general.

But Taako was already taking an unfair advantage of Kravitz’ disposition without even knowing to which degree he was bound to help. The cons of rushing it outweighed the pros.

“So, you coming?”

_Barely._

Begrudgingly, Kravitz turned into his astral form and floated to the boat. Starblaster it said, what kind of name was that, anyway?

“Aw, you are ruining the mood.”

“I’d rather not have lungs to be filled with seawater again, thank you very much.”

“You won’t fall, jeez, this is supposed to be a peaceful trip.”

It wasn’t a peaceful trip because this was the fucking end of the world and everything was dangerous. After they reached about three miles from the shore, Pan’s protection faded and the current almost tipped them over.

“HOLY FUCK,” Taako fell on his back. He had to crawl to the mast in order to have something to grab.

And Kravitz? His skeletal hands were practically _nailed_ to the wood. “WHAT WERE YOU EXPECTING?”

“WHAT?! I CAN’T HEAR YOU!”

“I SAID WHAT WERE YOU-”

“WAVE!,” Taako pointed at the massive wave that was about to crash on them.

They couldn’t talk for the rest of the trip.

Twenty painfully long minutes later, they reached land. Kravitz jumped down, walked at least a hundred feet from the shore and transformed back into his material form. He didn’t feel nauseous, but the ground was still moving beneath his feet. “I’ll rift my way back to the island if you don’t mind,” he said when Taako caught up to him.

“You literally can’t die.”

“It still wasn’t a pleasant experience!”

The elf rolled his eyes, “Look, I’m the one taking risks risk right now. Could you please show me the safest route?”

“You know I could lie to you right now, walk you straight into a deadly trap?”

Taako winked. “There’s nothing straight about any of us, hun. Besides, why are you telling me? If want to kill me now then go ahead, just do it.”

 _Rub it in, why don’t you._ “Where do you want to go?”

“Hm…” Taako looked around the place. Everything looked about the same in every direction. “Just show me around.”

So they just had a nice walk around the land. Or, well, as nice as it could be with the current state of the world.

Taako looked at everything with curiosity, interested specially in the little remains of plant life that laid around. They came across an old tree, turned almost to stone under the last wave of lava. Taako broke off a branch and pointed at it with his umbrella. Kravitz froze in place. _He can’t do it, can he?_

A ray of light shot from the umbrella, and the calcified branch… remained the same. Taako dropped it to the ground. “Meh, was worth a try.”

“Were you trying to transmute it into wood?”

“Yeah, but you know, I’m already too OP for my own good. What would be of you if I could undo the apocalypse all by myself?”

“I could officially take you down for breaking the laws of nature, so by all means, go on.”

“Nah, I’m officially bored of this, let’s go back to the beach?”

“Already?” Kravitz was really getting tired of Taako’s whims. “Aren’t you going to look around even a bit more? Why did you even want to come here?”

“To see the end of the world with my own eyes, duh!” He extended his arms, making emphasis on the ‘world’ part. “Not sure if you noticed but life at the beach has been going too nice lately, don’t you think? This is what the real post-apocalypse looks like.”

Kravitz was _very_ aware of that, “I just thought you would be a little more interested.”

Taako eyed him suspiciously, then looked around one last time. “I’m not, it’s boring. Let’s go back.”

Kravitz pinched his nose. “Alright, but I’m not hoping on that boat again, I already told you.”

“Oh, we are not going back to the island yet! I still have business here.”

Before Kravitz could ask what this business was exactly, Taako was already running. “We came from the other direction, you know?”

“We already saw that side! Is this way safe?”

“Yeah?” Alright then. Kravitz just followed Taako until they reached another side of the coast. Unlike the island, there was no sand, just soil that had been flooded. If memory served Kravitz right, this part of the world used to be at least ten miles away from the original border. The water rose and retreated at whim here, and the current at the shore was a constant tidal wave. Taako walked carefully, still curious about this world that seemed so different from his idyllic island life. But this was the norm everywhere else, he was the one living in a state of suspension from the rest of the world, all thanks to Pan.

Were the god’s powers limited to the island only? What would happen to Taako if he got caught up in something here, so far away from the cottage and its garden? Would he have survived?

Unbeknownst to him, Kravitz was just about to find out. Taako walked back to Kravitz, who was still not getting closer to the shore. “Alright, Krav! I hope you have a change of clothes in that weird shadow realm of yours…”

“You mean the astral plane.”

“… Because things are about to get splashy,” Taako raised his hands and lowered them on the ground-

“Wait, what are you doing?! Are you going to raise the land? _Here?!_ ”

“None of that! I want to be conscious this time!”

And so the ground beneath them began shaking. It was just an earthquake, well, as _just_ as an earthquake could be; Kravitz was getting tired of those. Taako laughed maniacally as Kravitz fell to his knees too, unable to stand. For ten seconds, everything was chaos.

A hundred feet away, the violent sea retreated. Taako finished the spell and stood up again. “And now we run!”

There was a cliff a good distance away from the shore and elevated enough to survive the upcoming wave. Taako wasted no time levitating both of them to the top of it. They could see the sea coming back in full force, one hundred feet, two, four, seven, and, _splash!_ The wave reached the base of the cliff. They were safe from the wave, yes, but water still managed to splash all over them from the crash.

“HA HA HOLY SHIT!”

Great, now half of Kravitz’s outfit was soaking. “What was the point of this?!”

Taako was laughing again. “I don’t know! I’m just so fucking bored! Look at all this water! I don’t know who is watching over me, but in my time on the island I’ve lived _four_ earthquakes, not counting the small tremors that come from time to time, and it’s never been like this!”

“But you’ve had to raise the island all these times.”

“That’s just so water won’t come inside the house and ruin everything like the other day, I was lucky it didn’t reach the green house. But if an _actual_ wave like this ever came I don’t think the house would be able to take it.”

It seemed counterproductive, Taako could be swept away so easily. And yet, Kravitz understood in part his desire to be there right now. There was beauty in the way nature manifested itself on this extreme level, its raw power unleashed without consideration for any living creature.

Then again, appreciating it from a save point of view was a privilege only an immortal being like Kravitz could have.

Or maybe a blessed elf, almost too dumb for his own good.

“If you just wanted to see an actual wave you should have asked, I know a place where the coast is in a constant state of war with itself,” Taako looked at him, his ears pointing up in interest. “I don’t think you’d survive the trip, though.”

Taako scoffed, “Don’t forget you are talking to the survivor of the apocalypse. But nah, thanks. I think I’m good with water for the next century. How about lava, though? Know of any active volcanoes around here?”

“Ah, in this place? I'm afraid they are all dead by now.”

"Bummer"

"But," Kravitz smiled, “I know of other places.”

Those places were at the other side of the world, but they made it there in less than a minute thanks to one of Kravitz’s rifts. The sudden shift in temperature almost knocked them down. Good thing their clothes were still damp.

“Hey, what the fuck is this?”

“That would be lava.” They were standing at the border of a fissure in the ground where lava was flowing, but the actual top of the mountain, while visible, was still far away from them.

“I thought you’d take me to a real volcano.”

“Sadly, that would count as killing you.”

“Coward.”

“You can walk, it’s right there.”

“But I don’t wannaaaa. We already walked so much today, you know I’ve been living a sedentary life for years.”

“What about the morning runs?”

Taako put a hand on Kravitz shoulder, “Krav, it’s time you know… I literally just started doing that to impress you.”

Kravitz laughed harder than he thought he would. Now he couldn’t stop picturing Taako after that first run, hiding the pain and exhaustion somewhere inside the house.

“Did it work?”

“It did _now_.”

“I know, I have that effect on people.”

The trip back was as chaotic as the first one. Kravitz had offered Taako another rift to the island, but he refused, hoping on the old boat again. Kravitz joined him, despite every warning inside his mind, and he regretted every second of it.

* * *

 

The Raven Queen cackled. _“Oh, silly mortals. It’s like they are attracted to danger.”_

“Makes you wonder how they survived for so long.” Kravitz didn’t really have anything else to say, so he waited for the goddess to dismiss him.

_“Well, I actually wanted to ask something else from you, but it seems your hands are full already.”_

Another mission? Sure, why not. He was already in the mood for quests. “Not at all, my goddess, what is it?”

_“You wouldn’t happen to know about Pan’s whereabouts, would you, Kravitz?”_

A cold shiver ran down his spine.

Kravitz calculated his next words, _carefully_. “I haven’t seen him around, no.” It wasn’t a lie, just omission of information. He did know some things about Pan. Things that could put the whole pantheon against him.

_“No, of course you wouldn’t. It’s just… we’ve kept trying to reach to him these past months, but he’s not answering to any of our calls.”_

“By ‘us’ you mean…?”

_“Just me and the rest of the pantheon.”_

Another shiver, was Kravitz sweating? It felt gross, how did he turn it off? He couldn’t stop sweating, but his body felt colder than ever.

“I’ll keep an eye around.”

_“Thank you. You are dismissed for today.”_

The connection was cut and Kravitz immediately stood up again. For the first time in decades, Kravitz had an urge for coffee.

* * *

 

Another sunday rolled by and Taako was feeling lost.

He still couldn’t pinpoint the nature of Kravitz intentions, but things were slowly falling to normal between them. He felt comfortable again to joke around him; Taako liked that, he liked Kravitz, and he liked having something to do, but he had a feeling it wouldn’t last.

Taako had suspected Kravitz was trying to sneak into his garden again, to maybe sabotage his source of food, but the plants assured Taako he hadn’t been there since the incident weeks ago.

So he tried to chill at least, sundays were the only time of the week where he could really sit and think, and he had a lot to think about.

The world, for example. That had seemed like such a big deal at first, when he met Kravitz, the whole apocalypsis thing. But the more time passed, the more he felt like… he didn’t really care. The world had ended for him two years ago, with Lup. Now his world just consisted of keeping his promise to Merle and spite Kravitz, and that last part didn’t appeal to him as much as it used to.

“You know,” he said aloud for anyone listening, “sometimes I wonder if you are lucky to have me or I am lucky to have you.”

He was just lucky. That last trip to the mainland was the last confirmation he needed to know someone out there wanted alive.

“You should have seen it, everything was beyond saving. I tried turning a burned branch into wood but it stayed like that. Is that part of Pan’s anti-cheat ban or just outright out of my reach?”

But the strawberry bushes didn’t know about any of that, they were just plants.

“Oh, don’t give me that! You are more than just plants. I’ve met politicians with less personality than you!”

Really, though, he had been wondering about it for quite some time now.

“Can you talk to Pan?”

The plants shook sideways. Ah, it was worth a try, but he figured if Pan could actually hear him through the plants he would’ve scolded Taako on his gardening habits long ago. Like, he was trying his best, but that shit was complicated, Taako was no druid.

Besides… wasn’t the one behind all those natural disasters that ended up destroying the whole world Pan himself?

A cold wind blew and Taako shivered. “Uf, gotta turn up the heater, is starting to freeze in here.”

But the bush gestured at him, pointing at the heater with one long vine: it marked 80 degrees.

That couldn’t be right.

He checked it, but it seemed to be working just fine. Besides, once the breeze passed, the temperature went up again. It just had been a cold wind.

A cold wind.

Wait, where did that come from?

He ran to the door, but it was closed shut, he left it like that ever since Kravitz had broken into weeks ago. That was the only way for the air to circulate, the place was hermetical.

There was another breeze.

Taako went back to the strawberries. “Did you feel that?”

The bush nodded.

“Where did it come from?”

Another vine moved, pointing a place much, much lower, near a corner. How didn’t he notice? Plants were slowly creeping away from it.

“No,” Taako fell to his knees. “No, no, no, no, no! NO, FUCK, NO!”

* * *

 

_Once the last patron of the restaurant left, Taako joined Lucretia at her table by the window. Her glass of wine was still half full, but she poured herself some more, and one for him, too. “Sorry for coming in so late, especially on a busy night.”_

_Taako accepted the glass of wine. “Lu, my gal, I know how busy your schedule is. The fact that you had time to pay ‘cha boy a visit is an honor.”_

_“I guess none of us is as busy as your sister, though. I was looking forward to talking to the both of you.”_

_Taako sighed. “Yeah, she dropped off from the restaurant earlier this week. Seems like there was another turn on her research or whatever.”_

_“Again? How many projects has she been into now? I heard the academy was considering her for another award after her last paper.”_

_“Yeah, those are starting to pile up around the house,” Taako smiled proudly. “But according to her is all about the same subject as always. She keeps referring to her work as the project, like they are all connected.”_

_“You mean Barry’s project, right?”_

_He nodded, his smile turning into a look of concern. It had been almost twenty five years now since then. In that time, Lup had traveled around the world a good number of times, visiting strange places, taking Taako with her most of those times. Whenever it seemed like she was getting close to a conclusion, something new happened that drew her back inside her study, sometimes for weeks at a time._

_“It’s getting harder to make sure she takes care of herself,” said Taako, “specially when I’m not around.”_

_“If you need to go back now, I understand.”_

_“No, no, it’s fine. I can’t take babysit her all the time,” he raised his stone of farspeech as proof of it. “I just called her an hour ago and she told me she was about to get dinner, see? We are slaying this functional adult shit.”_

_Lucretia smiled, though still a bit concerned. “If you say so.”_

_“What was it you wanted to talk about?”_

_She reached for her bag, taking a notepad and opening it for Taako to see. “It’s about the project I told you guys some time ago.”_

_“Oh, your super spell? How is it going?” The notes showed different results from Lucretia’s project, sometimes accompanied by (really good) drawings. “So, how is doing so far?”_

_“I’ve been able to replicate it, and it does exactly what it’s supposed to, but…”_

_“There’s a catch?”_

_“It only works on inanimate objects.”_

_“Oh. Well, that can still be useful, right?”_

_Lucretia stared at her cup, holding it firmly. Her eyes lit for a moment and a spark reflected on the glass, light pulsing across it surface until the material absorbed it. “Yes, but this is far from what I intended.”_

_“I’m sure there’s a lot of good you can do with this.” Taako reached for her glass. “Let me try it?”_

_“Wait,” she downed the contents in one sitting._

_“Atta girl.”_

_“It’s been a long week,” she defended herself, finally handing Taako the empty glass._

_“It sure has,” he said, putting the glass in the floor and stomping it as hard as he could._

_“Wait, don’t-!”_

_“MOTHERFUCKING SHIT MY LEG.”_

_“-do that. Oh my god, are you okay?!”_

_“YEAH I’M PEACHY ONLY MY BONES ARE BROKEN NOW HOW ‘BOUT THAT.”_

_Lucretia covered her face with one hand. “I should have warned you about the reaction effect, sorry. And, uh, you aren’t strong enough to break your leg with it.”_

_She was right, but that didn’t make that comment any less rude. Also, it hurt like hell. “Well fuck me I guess. You were lucky my cup is still intact, tho, I ain’t buying more so you can go around wasting them.” And, what the hell, he downed his own glas too, he fucking earned it._

_“What do you think, then?,” she still asked. “How can I improve this?”_

_“Huh? Dude, your spell is fucking bonkers, what else do you want?”_

_“I want this to protect people,” she said in a completely calmed manner, but Taako had known her practically all of her life. She was frustrated, Lucretia always set impossibly high standards for herself._

_“You could always start over, maybe make sure it works on living things from the beginning?”_

_“I… don’t have the time for that.”_

_Ah, right. Humans. Taako didn’t want to think about it. “Then just make sure it can be casted on something wearable, like armour.”_

_“I’ve thought about that, but the way it reflects impact could be dangerous for the wearer too.”_

_“Then cast it on a fort, somewhere people can hide on from, I dunno, dragons, war and shit.”_

_“That’s still a risk,” she said, exasperated, but more at her own lack of progress than Taako (he hoped). “It works well on small objects and relatively big sculpted items because the composition is simple, but buildings are made up of multiple parts that ensemble with each other; this spell treats every one of them separately, so for one I need to concentrate on each one of them when I cast it.” She took Taako’s cup and hers, one on each hand, and another glint of light shimmered in her eyes, then on the glass. “And second, the only thing strong enough to break a fortified object…” She held both at the base and closed her eyes; Taako did the same, because Lucretia didn’t fuck around and he didn’t want to lose his eyes yet. There was the clicking sound typical of glass colliding with itself, and when both opened their eyes, the cups were now cracked, “… is another fortified object.”_

_Taako huffed. “That’s tough, but you are still paying for those now.”_

_“Sorry, I got carried away.”_

_So, a protection spell that couldn’t be weared, rough start. It was hard to come up with something better than what she had already accomplished. ”Eh, I dunno, what if you make it waterproof?”_

_“That’s already covered. The spell also renders objects spell, sound, odor and stain proof.”_

_“Pf, what, didn’t have enough power to go lightproof?”_

_“I’ve found out turning objects invisible on top of being virtually indestructible is an awful idea.”_

_Taako snorted, “What, from experience?”_

_It wasn’t obvious thanks to her dark skin, but Lucretia blushed. “Yes.”_

_“I guess we can figure something else out. Just keep in mind this is not part of my school of expertise,” he took one of the glasses again, which was still holding itself, and poured himself some wine. It didn’t spill, so at least it wasn’t a complete loss yet. “But on one condition.”_

_“Of course. What is it?”_

_“You gotta teach me this rad as shit spell.”_

_They stayed at the restaurant for another hour, brainstorming and testing on Taako’s unfortunate crockery. All while the cup, leaked wine, drop by drop, on the fancy tablecloth._

* * *

 

Kravitz returned to the island well into the night. It was a beautiful evening, the sky was clear and every star visible up above. Maybe he could still ask Taako to have a cup of coffee outside? No, it was too cold for that. Pity.

He walked inside expecting the smell of dinner to greet him but was disappointed to find no signs of Taako’s cooking around. The lights were off too. “Taako? Are you home?”

A muffled answer came from the back hall. “Kravitz?! Shit, what time is it?”

“I’m not sure, nine? Sorry if I missed dinner, I lost track of time talking to the Raven-”

“Can you come in here?”

Kravitz hesitated. “Are you inside the greenhouse?”

There was a pause, Taako hesitated. Something faint creeped on Taako’s voice before he spoke up again. “Please.”

Kravitz was already running towards the back hall. Something about the context, coming back to find the house empty, walking down the trapdoor, it all seemed wrong. Kravitz wasn’t supposed to be there. Something terrible must have happened.

The door to the greenhouse was open, and everything inside looked just like he remembered, only now the plants reacted to his presence almost immediately. The rustling of their leaves was almost like a hiss, not even pretending to be docile this time. Their message was clear: one step more into their home and they would attack. Kravitz took a step back.

“Let him in, guys,” Taako’s voice ordered from a corner of the room. “Kravitz, could you _please_ get in here?!”

The plants opened up to let Kravitz in, but their guard was still up.

Taako was kneeling up behind some strawberry bushes. He was looking at Kravitz with reddened eyes, but Kravitz knew better than to comment on it.

“What’s going on?”

“Do you know any magic?” If Kravitz was expecting something, it wasn’t that question. Taako explained himself, “I ran out of spell slots, and I can’t rest like this. Tell me you know something that can fix object, even a cantrip will do.”

“I know some magic, but… all of it is offensive. What do you need to fix?”

If it was even possible, Taako’s expression dropped some more. His shoulders fell as he turned his back to Kravitz, pointing at something on the ground.

Right in the corner, where walls and floor met, there was a crack on the glass.


	8. Sitting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sitting, and thinking, and sitting, and worrying, and sitting alone, and sitting together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the wait! I wanted to catch up on NaNo before posting since editing takes me a day, but then I got hit by inspiration anddddddd I kinda finished the whole thing now. So hey, good news!
> 
> I lied about this update being long, is just regular. Next update tho... no you know what I'll stop promising shit because I might still move stuff around and split things up, this is why I'm still holding onto that /? chapter count.
> 
> I'll tell you this tho: that rating update? ... you know ;)

Faraway from home, in a place so against itself no life could ever exist on it, a crow rested peacefully. Its feathers were white, silver almost, and they contrasted against the dark landscape of burned soil and a maroon, polluted sky.

It was waiting, something impossible was about to happen. Although the event was coming late, but that was expected: miracles didn’t come easily these days.

Ah, there it was: a small sprout bloomed from the dead soil. It was slow to watch, but fast for a plant, and the crow stared patiently until a sprout became a stem, a stem grew branches, and on a branch, the crow perched itself.

"So I gather it's happened already, right?"

The plan didn't do anything else, as it was hard enough for it to exist in such difficult conditions, but Istus didn't need confirmation, for Destiny was her, and she could feel every new thread taking its place in the fabric of fate. Taako was already committed to his mission.

It was a matter of time for the plan to be set in motion, and there was nothing Istus wanted more than for it to go well. But she couldn't act, just watch and hope that the pieces fit together.

The plant moved, tugging at the crow's feet like a question.

The crow couldn't smile, but Istus irradiated happiness and pride. "Yes, Kravitz is doing his best, too."

* * *

 

Kravitz approached Taako making as little noise as possible; it was a good stealth check, or so he thought, but Taako had greeted him before even getting past four feet into the elf’s room. "'Sup, Krav."

“Hey, so, you’ve been here for a while.”

"I’m meditating, I need to refresh my spell slots. That glass is not going to repair itself."

A pang of guilt stabbed at him. Last night, when Taako finally asked for Kravitz’s help, he failed.

After Taako rushedly explained how his own spells hadn’t worked, Kravitz didn’t think twice before trying something himself. A fire spell, that seemed like a good idea; he could melt the glass and fuse it together again. However, prolongued exposition to the flame didn’t seem to have any effects on the glass. Kravitz put his hands on the surface after trying for five minutes, and it wasn’t even hot.

 _That damn wall._ “I need more space.”

Taako had to tell the plants to move out of the way because they wouldn’t listen to Kravitz. Once everything was cleared, Kravitz casted an even bigger flame and let it burn for another five minutes.

Still nothing.

“It’s fireproof,” was Taako’s only explanation. “It’s fine, I’ll just figure something myself.”

No, wait, but Kravitz hadn’t done anything yet! “I still can-”

“Krav, I’m sorry, but the plants are starting to freak out with you in here and I really can’t deal with that right now.”

He couldn’t argue with that, and in the end he just left Taako by himself while he replayed Istus’ words on his mind.

 _Taako will tell you what you must do_. Well, that didn’t work, so there’s that.

The whole night had passed; Taako only left the greenhouse to walk a beeline to his own bedroom, and he hadn’t left since then.

"Taako, dawn broke two hours ago, aren’t you going to make breakfast?"

"If you are hungry, there’s fruit on the counter.”

Kravitz sighed. “You know I don’t get hungry.”

“Then stop bothering me!” he snapped. “I said I’m meditating, if you don’t mind.”

Kravitz didn’t let that upset him. Taako was obviously desperate, and Kravitz too, in a way, but if this depended on Taako they wouldn’t get anywhere with that attitude. He was too stubborn to focus on anything else.

Stubbornness… that's what he needed right now. "It's fine, I mean, if you want to starve yourself to death that's just one less problem for me."

Taako finally turned around at that, and he was _glaring_. Oh man, if looks could kill and Kravitz weren't already dead… "Seriously? You think that's going to work _now_?"

Kravitz hoped it did?

"… Because there's no way in hell I'm letting you win now, asshole.” He finally stood up and pushed Kravitz out of his room. “Get out of the way, I'm going to make crêpes."

Now that the sun was out it was a beautiful day outside, they could see it from the dining room’s window. Once he placed their crêpes on the table, Taako sat down and let himself feel down again.

Right now, he looked so… old. Not the way most races did, his face was still smooth and beautiful, his body fit, like all elves were after reaching maturity. And yet, by his posture, and how the light of his eyes had dimmed, he looked so _tired_ ,. When they first met, Kravitz had assumed Taako to be a little over a century, if anything to put himself in the worse case scenario where Taako still had his whole life ahead of himself, but right now it was clear he must have been older, at last three times that age.

Breakfast came and left without much, any attempt at smalltalk culminated in monosyllabic answers from Taako and. When he was done, Taako just stood up and went back to the glass room, leaving Kravitz feeling more out of place than ever.

So, what could he do? Wait, again. If there was a way to fix the glass, Taako would tell him, right? And he could actually help then, right?

Kravitz was left again in that middle ground between knowing the end was about to come, and having no idea of what to do to bring it faster.

Hours passed. Kravitz might aswell call the Raven Queen again, but doing so could probably alert her that something had come up, and how would he explain the garden now? That wasn’t an option.

And the day went by, uneventful.

* * *

 

After the second day, Kravitz started checking on Taako. Since he couldn’t enter the glass room without the plants making a fit, he resorted to call Taako from the hall to remind him he needed to eat something from time to time. The meals he made these days weren't especially fancy; as long as Taako was spending all his slots trying to fix the wall, transmutation was out of the table.

“Here, enjoy this plain ass pasta with a side of boring sauce.”

Kravitz tried a bite of his plate, and truth to be told, even with no magic the food was still delicious. “This is pretty good.”

“Oh, thank you, that means a lot coming from a corpse.”

That… was mean, but he did have a point. “Hey, you don’t have to keep cooking for two anymore.”

“So you actually hate it?”

“Taako, you might actually run out of food if the garden doesn’t-”

The plates jumped half an inch when Taako slammed his hands on the table. “Don’t you fucking dare bring your stupid Grim Reaper agenda now.”

_No, wait, I actually mean it this time-_

“Just finish your plate.”

Taako didn’t talk to him for the rest of dinner.

* * *

 

On the third day, tired of sitting around and seeing how Taako was still getting nowhere, Kravitz looked for another approach.

The attic was one of the places he rarely visited. He did once, when he was still poking his nose all around to find the secrets of the glass room. Back then he hadn’t found anything of value to his mission, but if memory served him right… There, inside a drawer, he found duct tape.

It was worth a try.

Kravitz had to actually enter the glass room this time. When he called for Taako to help him get inside, he sounded confused. "Dinner already? I could swear it's been an hour since lunch."

"An hour and a half, actually, but I'm not here for that. May I come in?"

The other didn’t answer right away, but he finally gave a heads up to the plants and called him inside. “What is it?”

Kravitz showed Taako the tape, "I thought this might be useful?"

Now that he was actually there, Kravitz realized just how ridiculous he must have looked. However, Taako accepted his offering with all seriousness, regarding it with interest. "Do you think? I mean, I've tried all kinds of spells, but this…"

He cut a strip of tape and placed it on top of one of the cracks. It was getting bigger, Kravitz noticed.

Palming it carefully once, two times, Taako let go of the tape, and… it fell to the floor like it didn't have any glue on it.

The two of them sighed. "Sorry,” said Kravitz, “I guess I should have checked if the glue had expired."

"No, that's not it," Taako grabbed the strip and then opened his hand, showing how the tape was sticking to it. "The glass must also be stick proof."

Kravitz groaned, of fucking course it was stick proof. Well, so much for actually being of help. All he was good at was hunting souls, Istus should have known better than to leave him to take care of living being's problems.

But he couldn't dwell on his self-pity for long, since the weirdest sound interrupted him. Chuckling, then laughs.

Taako was actually laughing.

"Oh, man, she actually made it stick proof! That woman was unstoppable!"

Kravitz stared at him in disbelief. "Why are you laughing? It didn't work."

"Of course it didn't! Do you have any idea of what went into making this damn spell? It better not fucking work, this shit was made to last! Literally the only thing capable of breaking an object that’s been charmed by this spell is another like it, and I’m honestly surprised that didn’t happen sooner."

Taako stood up, dusting dirt from his legs, because even if most of the plants had migrated to other areas of the greenhouse, there was still soil everywhere. "Well, I've had enough for today. No use in keeping myself locked up if this is getting nowhere."

Kravitz didn't know what he was trying to achieve then, but in the end, it got Taako to leave the glass room for the first time in days, so he wasn't complaining. "What will you do now?"

"First… I need to think. Do you want some cookies?"

Taako looked better too, if only for a moment. It was good to see him like that again. “Why, if you insist.”

* * *

 

A change of approach is what Taako needed, and that approach was _change_ itself. Taako revisited his books on transmutation. If he couldn’t fix the broken glass wall, maybe he could replace it with a complete piece? It was like recycling, environmental even.

Not that there was a point to environmentalism these days.

Sitting in the greenhouse's floor, surrounded by books and plants, Taako casted his strongest spell on the wall. It did… nothing.

Hm. Okay, maybe that approach wasn’t going to get him anywhere either.

Taako looked at the plants. "Hey, it's going to be okay, alright? You know I won’t let anything happen to you."

The plants didn't look specially concerned about the situation of the greenhouse yet, but Taako had known them for decades. When the next storm came, they would get scared and it as going to be awful, not only for them but for Taako himself. And the last time they had to deal with something like that was like a century ago, they were going to freak out so hard. Maybe he could enlist Kravitz’s help.

Oh, Kravitz. He was still being inexplicably cooperative, but Taako didn’t have the energy to worry about that now. If he could take advantage of that disposition to get out of this, the Taako would take it. Honestly, he was really lucky to have him around.

And speaking of luck… The more he thought about it, the more he wondered how he had managed to keep the place in one piece for so long.

But then again, the things he had to face were nothing compared to everything else that was going on around the world. Even to this day, half a year after the apocalypse, tidal waves and active volcanoes made of Faerun a living hell. The only reason the house was still standing was because something or someone had been taking care of him. Maybe Lup had reached enlightenment after studying the weather for so long and now her soul ruled over it, that would explain both that and the ridiculous amount of active volcanoes out there. That was so Lup.

Really, though. How long would it last? One day, the forces that had been protecting him wouldn't be there anymore.

…

But Taako himself didn’t need the help. The plants did.

And who protected them?

He turned around again, looking at the plants. They stared back in the way plants do, without eyes, but still making you feel observed. "I'm going to ask again: can you talk to Pan?"

The plants shook.

"Alright, now listen carefully: can you _hear_ Pan?"

They nodded.

They nodded! Holy shit!

"Okay, okay, woah, that's fucking- should've thought of that before.” He breathed in and out, watching his next words carefully. “Pan, I’m in a bit of a pickle here and I could really use all the help in the world to get out of it. So, if you are looking over me, give me a sign."

And Taako right then, right there, one of the vanilla vines reached towards Taako. He was so amazed, all he could do was stare until the vine took his hand and held it. The vanilla didn't constrain him like it usually did, its touch was softer now.

Pan was listening, and he had answered.

"… Huh, uh, well. You see, I didn't think I would get this far so to be honest I have no fucking idea of what to say."

The vine waited patiently, to give him time to think. Alright, the god of nature Himself was communicating with Taako through a vanilla vine, no biggie. Why were they talking again? Ah, right, the crack on the glass.

Taako held onto the vine’s hold. "I don't think I’ll be able to fix this anytime soon. Or, like, ever."

The vine nodded, because Pan had known this all along.

"But you can do some really cool shit, like keeping the sea from eating my house. Not too hard, at least?"

The vine nodded again, and so Taako finally confirmed what he had been suspecting these past weeks. He didn’t have the time to dwell on his amazing detective skills, though.

"Can I ask you something then?"

And the vine… didn't react at first. It let go of his hand hovered in front of him instead. Taako did not speak plant, but he could guess at the meaning of that. _Why?_

Taako smiled and he proceeded to say the dumbest shit he had ever said in his life (and that bar was pretty fucking high): "What if I ask you to stop?"

* * *

 

Kravitz was sitting by the beach when Taako found him. “Yo, enjoying the view?”

Seeing Taako outside was kind of surprising, but if he had walked out of the house on his own then it meant he really was getting better, so Kravitz didn’t comment on it. He shrugged, “I just felt like watching the sea up close.”

“Mind if I join you?”

“It’s your island.”

Taako sat next to him with and took the opportunity to stretch his legs a bit.

This was super romantic, Kravitz noticed. Taako would surely make a comment about it. A voice inside his head told him to play along this time, but he shushed it away.

The comment never came, though. Taako seemed deep in thought about something else. "You see that, over there,” he pointed at a far point in the horizon, “how the water suddenly stops being nice and friendly and turns into a fucking death trap of salt and seasickness?"

"Yes, we were _there_ the other day."

"I've had a theory that just recently got confirmed," Taako smiled proudly as he announced his discovery: "some higher power has been looking over me."

Kravitz feigned surprise. "No, really?"

"It's none other than Pan Himself!"

Kravitz feigned a bit more surprise. "Well, that surely is a twist of events-"

"I know you know, Krav."

Ah. Well then. Kravitz cleared his throat, "Why are you telling me, then?"

"I talked to him today."

Kravitz was actually surprised this time. "What?! Really?!"

"Will you _let me finish_."

"Sorry."

“Before I tell you the juicy deets of our conversation, though, I need to ask you something.”

All of Kravitz’s attention was on Taako now. If this was really it, then he could just say yes to whatever Taako asked right away. But he needed to keep up appearances now, and he would have to until Istus’ mission was finally accomplished. So, instead of an instant ‘yes’, he asked: “What is it?”

“Would you help me move all of my plants somewhere else?”

“WHAT?”

“I said, would you help m-”

“I know what you said! I just heard what you say! What I can’t understand is _why_ you would say it!”

“Because I don’t want them to die? That greenhouse is as good as gone now, the moment another flood comes in they’ll drown, I need to take them somewhere safer.”

Kravitz wanted to summon Istus, make her listen to the nonsense Taako was sprouting right now. She asked Kravitz to follow _this_ plan? “Where,” he asked, “exactly are you planning to take them? Because I’ve been out there and, let me tell you, _there are no greenhouses left._ ”

“Pf, I already know that, silly! I’m going to plant them!”

“Plant them.”

“Yep.”

Kravitz inhaled sharply. “I’m going to ask again, _WHERE?!_ ”

Taako picked a book from one of his pockets and sprayed it out on his thighs. It was, like most of the books in the house, on the subject of gardening. "See this? It has an entire chapter dedicated to soil and all the different places you can get it. Do you know where to find fertile soil, Krav?"

Kravitz grimaced. "Back in the day I could give you a few examples, but now? It's all dead, Taako, everything's been burned to ashes."

"No, Krav, everything's been burned to _stone,_ " he flipped the pages and until he found a picture of the different stages in the life of a volcano. The illustrations showed it going into eruption, the disaster that followed, rivers of magma turning to stone, and then… life sprouting from them. Uh-oh. "You've been around for a long time, right? You know what happens after lava burns everything? It’s flower town, baby!"

"Taako, the soil around a volcano is fertile _after_ its eruption. The world right now is _still_ burning."

"No it's not! You just told me the other day some of these places had ceased activity!"

"Yes, _months_ ago! It's still too soon for this to work!"

"And that's where _I_ come in," Taako retrieved another book, this one was one of his tomes on transmutation. That thing was heavy, where did he keep those? "I can accelerate the process. It'll take weeks, tops, and I'll be going from here to there at least three times a week, but I can totally make it work." He looked at Kravitz straight into the eye, he didn't just believe in his plan, he has _convinced_ it would work. "Trust me, Krav, this is my best chance right now. I just need you to take me there."

Here was something only Kravitz could do, and yet he couldn’t bring himself to say yes. Let Taako use the rifts was incredibly risky. Once could be excused to the elf's irrational attraction to danger, just like the last time they left the island together, but making frequent use of them could actually arise suspicion on the Raven Queen, maybe even the whole pantheon.

And even if the first part somehow worked out fine… the moment the first plant left the house, they would all know.

"Kravitz, please, I swear, I can’t get there without you. I'll do everything else, turning stone into soil, moving the plants. If something happens while I'm out here it's your win, I die and we can leave this world peacefully, but I can't give up without trying. These plants _need_ me."

Taako was still looking at him, it was so intense Kravitz could barely hold his stare. Maybe he should convince him of looking for another way, something they can do without risking themselves so much. But Taako was beyond convinced of this… A sigh escaped Kravitz, "Let's say your new plan works, you get to turn one corner of the world into a garden, how will the plants survive? You still won't have a greenhouse to protect them."

A look of mischief appeared on Taako's face, "Actually, remember what I said about my conversation with Pan?"

Kravitz opened his eyes wide. “You got his help too?!”

“I mean, this is more like Pan helping me help him, it’s a _pannist_ garden. But, ah, there’s a catch to his part.”

Taako pointed at the sea again. Kravitz had a bad feeling.

"I’ve been living on Pan’s help for a couple years now. At first I didn’t notice because this place was always like this, calm and kinda lazy, but after seeing the world the other day, I realized… I don't need this to survive.”

Oh no.

“It's been hell, yes, but I'm a mother fucking wizard! I could take on anything the world threw at me. Maybe not here in the middle of a raging sea, but if I could go back to land, find a nice cave far away from the coast, and preferably any active volcanoes, I could find my way out of it!"

Kravitz was covering his face with one hand now. "Taako, it really is more complicated than that."

"No is not," he said matter-of-factly. "I've got the experience now, and thanks to our little date the other day I've made myself an idea of what to expect, so thanks for that, handsome," Kravitz groaned. "But these guys? They are so fragile, Krav, like you have no idea. They get scared of loud noises, strangers, being alone for too long. That's why I asked Pan today to help me save them."

Kravitz sighed. "You asked him to protect them instead of you."

And Taako, against anything dictated by common sense, smiled. He was beyond determined at this point, Taako knew it was the only way. "So, you in or not?"

Kravitz should have said yes right away. Taako was going to die, it was a fact now. It was a win/win situation for Kravitz no matter how you looked at it. Except, of course, for the part where the whole pantheon discovered them and obliterated their souls. "Why is this garden so important to you?," he asked instead. If this was going to be the end, if it was going to come just like this after all this time, he needed to know. Why did Istus put him there?

Taako didn’t answer him then. "Let's go back," he stood up and dusted the sand from his legs.

“Wait, Taako, won’t you tell me?”

“Not here!” he yelled, since he was already ten feet away. “I’ll tell you inside.”

Kravitz stood up too, quickly catching up to Taako. “Why not now? You are asking for my help.”

“Because it’s a long story, and I’d rather tell you over a cup of double bean water.”

Kravitz paused for a moment. “A story? Now?”

“Yep. You’ve officially unlocked the full tragic backstory.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> See you on December for the final strech of The Bean Water Saga!
> 
> (and if i dont update by the next weekend, you can yell at SitaNorita@Twitter)


	9. The Last of Them

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Taako's backstory.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if it makes you feel better, i made myself cry

So they were inside now. It was about tea time, although none of them had tea these days; Taako wouldn’t admit he took a liking for the double bean water even now, while he made himself some in the biggest mug he could find around the house.

“I think we had this conversation before.”

"Hm, yeah, but that was the abridged version.”

Kravitz still recalled that conversation perfectly, he had ingrained it on his mind, put it in the special place that concerned everything about the elf that had survived the apocalypse. “I know the garden was an inheritance from a dear friend of yours, but is this sentimentalism really worth risking everything now? You can still go peacefully, Taako.”

Taako rolled his eyes. “There he goes again. You know, there was a time back then when I kind of missed this silly bantering.”

“I’m serious.”

“Hey, I’m serious too. This isn’t just about the garden, I told you something else that time, right?”

Kravitz didn’t have to think hard, that other detail had taken him by surprise back then --or, at least, the fact that Taako would share it with him. “Your sister, you moved in after she died.”

Taako nodded then, and looked to the side, where a cupboard with a glass door rested at the wall. The reflection looked back at him. "Her name was Lup."

Kravitz gasped. If he was expecting something from this, the last would be a _name_ , of all things. Taako just let it out without a care for what Kravitz could do with that kind of information.

Taako laughed at his reaction, "Look it up if you want, she'll kick your ass if you try to do anything against me."

"I wasn't-"

"Nah, I'm just fucking with you, Krav. I'm telling you now because this story starts with her. Well, it's more like a prologue, then it comes back and- ah, forget it, this storytelling bullshit is so over complicated. The point is, she is the last living person I ever saw, I think it's important if I give you a little context about her.

"So, Lup was married to a human who, like most humans tend to do, died too soon. Lup was heartbroken at first, but since her husband was a big fucking nerd, she decided to honour his memory by taking the research he left behind and carrying it to completion. And while at first it seemed like something small she could do whenever she missed him, it soon overtook most of her time, until she was working full time on it.

"And, I mean, ALL OF IT. She focused too much sometimes, often forgetting to do basic shit like eating lunch because she got too caught up on something. I had to practically babysit her! She was a mess. We worried, you know? Our friends, and I.

"But she was good at it. The academy awarded her on multiple occasions for her research. And I had my own life too, mind you, my restaurant got featured on cooking magazines all the time. I even had a cooking show."

"Yeah, you told me about it."

Taako crossed his arms and smiled smugly. "Never forget that coffee you are drinking was made by a fucking pro!"

Kravitz took another sip, "Trust me, I've never doubted it."

"Anyway," Taako folded his arms on the table, "we were living the life and all that. Until, one day, a hundred years ago, life decided it was having none of Lup's shit and flipped her off."

* * *

 

It was mere chance Taako was home early that day. Freetime was scarce when you were one of the city’s renowned chefs, and syncing up his already packed schedule with Lup’s erratic one got harder over time. Nowadays he settled for a good day of shopping and ordering food, because even chefs got tired of cooking all the time.

He was sitting on the living room, book in hand, when Lup opened the door. Oh, nice, at least they could share dinner this t-

_Slam!_

Oh man, bad day at work, huh? "Watch the door, you fucking brute!"

Lup didn’t even greet him. Welp, she was best left alone when she was angry. He decided they would talk later over dinner, banging on doors was no suitable behaviour after all...

Until another slamming sound came from her study. And kicking. And banging.

Taako got up in record time. When he got there, Lup was livid, picking stuff and throwing it away, kicking on the sturdy furniture, and when she yelled, flames burst up from her hands, pointing at the pile of papers and binders sitting on her desk.

"Woah, wait!" Taako ran to hold her down but she kept tugging at him. The fire on her hands was dangerously close to burning Taako's clothes, but he wasn't letting go. "Lup, holy fuck, calm down!"

"Let go! I'll burn it down! I'll burn it all to hell!"

"What's wrong with you?! That's your life's work!"

"IT'S WORTH NOTHING!" The fire grew higher and higher until it burned Taako's hands and consumed Lup's entire arms, and then it died. She fell to the floor, crying in anger. "AFTER ALL MY RESEARCH, ALL MY CONTRIBUTIONS, ALL THE FUCKING WORK I'VE DONE THESE YEARS AND THEY JUST DROP ME ONE DAY WITHOUT REASON!" Lup held her head in her hands screamed, long and rough until her lungs gave up.

But in all that time, Taako never let go of her. He just waited, Lup screamed some more, and cried, and cursed, and punched at the floor until she calmed down again. When she was finally done, Taako stayed with her on the ground, just holding her, saying nothing more.

* * *

 

That night, after dinner, Lup told Taako everything.

“I was just this close to the end.”

The look on Taako’s face must have given his thoughts away.

“Okay, I’ve been wrong before, but… listen, I’ve tried to pinpoint the pattern of weather anomalies for years. You know these things are usually attributed to a phenomena like El Niño or whatever, but it’s getting to the point where shit that wasn’t there days ago like, I don’t know, a fucking hurricaine manifests out of thin air- no pun intended. And there’s been an increase of those in the past decades, events such as tidal waves or droughts happening sometimes weeks before they were usually expected, increasing in intensity with the pass of time. Getting a heads up on those would greatly help entire cities get prepared… I’m sorry, I think I lost you.”

Taako, who was doing his best effort to follow the flow of conversation and not dozing-off, nodded in mild confusion. “No, no, I’m fine, just go on.”

Lup sighed. “I’m about to get to a part you can understand. I believe with more founding we will be able to figure this pattern and possibly predict future events with precision. The first time I told the institute about my findings they seemed eager to help, I mean, my research has won _them_ awards too, you know? I was really ecstatic to get there, I’ve even considered leaving the future of the project in the hands of the institute after developing my forecast system. Taako, this is how sure I am that this is the final stretch.

“But then, days passed without news from the institute, and weeks, until it was a month. I’ve asked countless times if everything was fine, when was I going to get an answer, until…” She breathed in, trying to calm herself down because once again her fists were clenched and starting to irradiate heat.

Taako already had a feeling where this was going. “Until today.”

Lup exhaled, opening the palms of her hands. “Today, they finally informed me that the project has been cancelled. No further explanations, no chance for appellation, just… a fucking _letter_ delivered this morning.” A column of smoke rose from her palms. “Taako, I _went_ there, I walked into the institute, to ask them anyway, to make my case, but they wouldn't listen to me! So she lost my composure and- and I _threatened_ to burn the fucking place!”

“Lup!”

“I was angry, okay?! But these fuckers still had the gall to call the guards on me, and-!,” she sighed. “So that’s it! I was obviously bluffing but now I really feel like going back and burning that fucking place to ashes.”

"I'm a little surprised you didn't already," Taako half-joked.

Lup laughed, then sighed, then growled, then pulled at her own hair. She was desperate, Taako had rarely seen her like that. "Taako, I don't know what I'll do now. I was getting so close! They let me down at literally the worst possible moment!"

"Can't you find funds somewhere else?"

"I've tried before, even if just to get a little extra to hire me some help, but the schools of magic rarely get involved in climate research as it is associated with the gods, churches don't give that kind of money to scientists, and government programs prioritize technology over research. The institute has been my only source of support for decades!"

It might have come as a surprise, but… Taako really didn’t know enough about the subject.

_Maybe without her research, she'll have more time to help you around the restaurant._

He could really use the help, but most of all… he missed her.

"Then I'll sponsor your research."

Lup looked at him, confused at first, then in disbelief. "Taako, no, you can't-"

"I can and I will. This project is your life, it's not fair that you have to drop everything just because some smartasses think it's not worth their brand anymore."

"But you already do so much for me! You take care of everything around the house, you cook, you even make sure I don't overwork myself! Taako, please, you don't need to do this for me just because you are my brother."

" _Lulu_ ," he said with a firm voice. "I'm not doing this because you are my sister. I'm doing it because you are one hell of a scientist." Taako held Lup's hand over the table, it was still hot, but he didn’t back down. "I know I never say it, but I am proud of you."

Lup squeezed his hand. “I will pay you back, I promise.”

“Or you can have your next Fantasy Nobel engraved with my name.”

“… I really can’t do that.”

“Pft, fine. Just pay me whenever.”

Lup laughed again, and this time, she hugged him. "Thank you, Taako, thank you so much."

* * *

 

Taako leaned towards Kravitz on the table. "You got all that, right?"

"Um, yeah? That was very sweet of you."

"Good, because that was foreshadowing."

"I'm... pretty sure you are not supposed to tell me," but there was something about this story that concerned Kravitz…

"Anyway! Prologue’s over. Next episode is how we adopted a bunch of murder plants."

* * *

 

Taako tapped on the ground impatiently, looking to the right, looking to the left. Where was Lup? They had agreed on meeting at the restaurant ten minutes ago. He had closed early for this!

He tried her stone frequency again to no avail, then called Mavis. "Hey, so uh, Lup's still late."

_"That's too bad, we can't keep postponing it..."_

"No, it's fine, you guys go ahead and we'll join you later. Do you think it would be too bad?"

_"Not at all! I mean, if you miss your part I can tell you later..."_

"TAAKO!"

_"Oh! That was her?"_

"Yup. Call you back." He put the stone back on his pocket and crossed his arms. "Little late, aren't we?"

"Sorry," a gasp, "so sorry," another gasp, "I got caught up and then-"

"Then you lost track of time, I know," he would've scolded her some more, but they were so fucking late already. "Come on, they are waiting."

It was good the law firm was only five blocks away from Taako's restaurant. Five minutes later, they stood at the beginning of a dark and cold hall.

Taako squeezed Lup's hand. "So, it just the two of us now."

Lup smiled, sadly. She probably wanted to tell Taako that wasn't true, that he still had friends, co-workers, people who looked up to him. But, well, now that Merle was gone, she really was the only person left he felt close to. The last of them, and the first.

"Guys, over here!" The voice of Mavis came from behind one sturdy looking door at the end of the hall. She was peeking through, ushering them to get inside.

The twins walked as fast as they could without making any loud noises, but the echo of their heels hitting the hardwood floor was almost like a riot in such a quiet place. Lup whispered, "Sorry we are late, did we miss anything?"

"The executor already read the preface of dad's will, but it was nothing important just yet, only the legal details, making sure it was valid and all that." She closed the door and walked them to their seats, two empty spots near the end of the table. As they walked to their seats, she mouthed, _I'm glad you could make it._

Aside from them, everyone else in the room was a dwarf, close and far stranded relatives alike. That was something so strange to them, the bonds these people formed based on the concept of family, how people barely related to each other clinged to a sense of loyalty to their names. Mavis and Mookie sat at each side of the executor, followed in proximity by Merle's ex-wife, and then his closest cousins. The twins felt out of place among all these people, but Mavis had told them the day before that Merle had explicitly asked for them to be at his will's reading.

Taako squeezed Lup's hand again under the table.

The reading was... awkward. Every once in awhile someone would sniff, sob, or even bawl at the mention of their own name. Not that Taako _blamed_ them or anything, he felt sad too, but all this public demonstrations of emotion made him, well, a bit uncomfortable. When Magnus died, he and Merle poured a cold one in his name, just talking about the good times; all the crying had been done at home.

Well, he figured these people were at home, in their own way.

Lup behaved herself better than him. While usually hyperactive, or at least fidgety, she was now sitting straight, eyes lost at some far point in the front wall. That didn’t surprise him, though; Lup had always been more in touch with her emotions.

"To Lup and Taako, my closest friends," the executor said their names in a weird accent, Tay-ay-ko and Lap, which made Taako snort probably a little too loud and earn a couple stares of disapproval, "I leave you the cottage at the beach, knowing that you will care of it with the same love and dedication I did."

The impact was so big even Lup broke her composure. "Holy shit, the _house_?!"

" _One_ of the houses," corrected the executor.

Taako and Lup shared a look of complete disbelief, _Did you hear that?!_ , it said. They had to fight the urge to talk for the rest of the reading.

When it was finally over, they excused themselves quickly and exited to the hall again to discuss the matter in a calm, civilized manner.

"THE FUCKING HOUSE."

"JACKPOT, MOTHERFUCKERS."

"OH MY FUCKING GOD."

And then they screamed into each other's faces for a solid minute until another door opened to shush them up, because they were still in a legal building where people worked and shit.

"Okay," Lup started, "okay, okay, okay, calm down."

"You calm down."

"I AM CALM no I'm not BUT I NEED TO-" She muffled another scream behind her hands and sighed. "Taako, We can't take the fucking house."

"WHAT!?"

_“Shoosh!”_

"Fuck off, dude, we are having a moment!"

"Listen, Merle's family was there! Don't you think his children would have anything to say about this?"

Taako glared at her. "Unbelievable! My own blood betraying me like this! This is why dwarves live in harmony with each other, you know? They don't turn their backs on their twins for random whims of lawful goodness!"

"Oh, don't give me that shit now! You know Merle loved us, but he had kind of a rocky relationship with his family, maybe _he_ took the decision on a whim."

After trying to argue his point of view, aka, let's not give back the fucking house, Taako had finally been dragged into the room with Merle's family. Lup called for Mavis again, but since she was still busy talking to the executor, they had to settle with Mookie. "Hey guys, thanks for coming to my old man's loot party. Looks like you got the big prize!"

"Yes, we wanted to talk about that," Lup was talking with her best polite tone, wich in her case had still some traces of, well, Lup, but fortunately Mookie didn't care about these kinda things. "It is a really big house."

"I know! We hosted one family reunion there ten years ago and it kicked ass! I remember my little girl even tried to jump from the ceiling into the inflatable pool we had set for the kids and the fall was so big she broke an arm. Ah, precious memories."

"Wonder where she got it from," mumbled Taako, a faint memory of similar events taking place long ago, one of the last times Merle ever asked him to babysit.

"Yes, like you said, Mookie, that house is obviously important to you and your family," and with great effort, Lup managed to say: "We wouldn't want to take it from you."

"Nah, it's fine."

Lup blinked, taken by surprise by Mookie's _very_ quick response. "Uh, shouldn't you talk about this with your people?"

Mookie thought it over for about two seconds. "Hm, I don't think so! Dad was pretty clear in his will, the house is yours."

"You heard the man, sis, we should go get the keys now and leave this good people to their mourning."

"No fucking way we are not," Lup proceeded to walk towards Mavis, still trying to behave like an educated person, but her steps were heavy on the wooden floor. "Mavis, may I have a second? It's about the house."

"Oh, sure! Let me go through the last details of the will and I'll fetch the keys for you-"

"No, no, it's fine, this will only be a second: we feel bad about taking the house."

Taako appeared behind her. "We?"

"The two of us, yep, Taako and me, me and Taako, totally not wanting to take advantage of this situation."

"Oh, not at all!" replied Mavis heartily. "If dad wanted to give you the house, who are we to go against his last wish?"

"But aren't you angry? You were his eldest!"

"Lup, I appreciate your concern, by I'm fine! I've already got a nice house of my own."

Lup was really getting frustrated, but Taako didn't see what was wrong in receiving a gift from a dear friend! She walked away from Mavis, straight to Merle's ex-wife. "Alright, you must have something to say on the matter."

Hekuba looked Lup over with an unreadable expression. "On what, may I ask?"

"The bigass house in a paradisiac location Merle just inherited to me, an elf, and my brother, also an elf?"

Lup versus Hekuba, an unstoppable force versus an unmovable object. The dwarf looked her and Taako over one more time before going back to politely ignoring them. "It was an ugly house anyway."

From the tip of Lup's fingers, small trails of smoke began forming. Taako barely noticed in time to grab her arms, and Lup, who had just been trying to be polite, finally lost her composure. "ARE YOU SHITTING ME? ARE YOU REALLY OKAY WITH THIS? DO SERIOUSLY NONE OF YOU WANT THE FUCKING HOUSE?"

"I mean," a dwarf man said, "if you really don't want it, it _is_ a pretty cottage-"

"Shh!" another one scolded him in a whisper. "You idiot, did you forget about the _monsters_?"

But what could go unnoticed to dwarven ears was easily picked by the two elf twins. Lup and Taako exchanged looks of confusion, and then it hit both of them at the same time.

"Oh, the garden!" said Lup.

"No! The garden!" cried Taako.

Lup turned back to Mavis. "Okay then, can you give me the keys now?"

"What?!" Taako looked powerless as his sister accepted the biggest burden someone could ever place upon other person like it was nothing. He turned then to Merle's family, desperate. "COME ON! DO SOMETHING!"

"Taako, we are leaving! Let these people mourn in peace."

" _DO SERIOUSLY NONE OF YOU WANT THE FUCKING HOUSE?!_ "

Lup grabbed Taako by the back of his tunic and just dragged him out of the building. He screamed the whole way out.

* * *

 

The next day, a sunday, Taako and Lup opened the door to Merle's house, _their_ house. Everything was just like they remembered, with Merle's fine taste in interior design completely ruined by Magnus' sturdy furniture.

Lup smiled at Taako. "Home, sweet home!"

" _Su casa es mi pesadilla,_ " said Taako.

"Don't be like that!"

" _How_ am I supposed to be? You know I had gotten myself a hot date today, I had to cancel last minute! Hey, did you know? When you tell people 'Hey, hot stuff, I'm ditching you because I just inherited a house on the beach,' they think you are fucking with them. Now he’s never talking to me again!"

"You can get yourself a man any other day of the week. Come on, the guys must be hungry," and she went ahead to the back hall.

Taako walked behind at his own peace, "Okay, one, plants don't get 'hungry', and two, _guys_? It's a garden, not summer camp. And don't get too ahead of yourself, you know they don't-"

"AAAAAAGH!!"

"Like you. Gosh, I'll have to be in charge won't I."

Unsurprisingly, the first thing Taako saw when he entered the glass room was Lup hanging from her ankle, fire on her hands and at least six types of flowers threatening her. He couldn't help the laughing fit, it was a pretty comical scene.

"Oh, fuck off. Tell them I'm good!"

"You are the one holding literal fire on your hands! They are scared," Taako turned towards one of the rose bushes threatening his sister. "Aren't you, friendo? Who's that crazy lady barging in other people's greenhouses? Just let her go, she doesn't deserve it yet."

Lup fell to the ground with a thud. "Ow!"

"You are welcome, now get up. The sooner we are done with this, the better."

Lup followed him to the closet where Merle stored his gardening tools, still rubbing her back after the abrupt fall. "There's no 'done' here, you know these things live forever. What Merle did was practically sentencing us for the rest of our lives."

"Ugh, I really don't want to think about that now. Why couldn't he just give us something normal? Like a cool spell, or a boat, or just all the furniture in his house! Actually, none of those are normal passing gifts either, what the fuck is wrong with us? We befriended a bunch of weirdos."

He handed her a shovel and a bag of compost, as a peace offering from her to the plants. They'd treat her better if she carried something valuable to them. Or they would kill her and steal it. Anyway, he took a pair of scissors.

"I think it's nice, you know?," Lup said, cheerfully, more than she had the right to be, "to still have something from them to remember from time to time. It's a good way to keep the people you love with you for a bit longer."

Taako smiled, "Just like Barry's research, right?"

Lup didn’t answer right away. "Yeah..."

Taako turned to look at her, confused by her tone. She was staring at the plant, deep in thought.

Maybe he shouldn't have said that, but when he was about to apologize, she spoke up again. "Makes you think, huh? What will you give me when you die so I never forget you?"

He thought about it, _really_ thought about it. What could he give her that was ten times better/worse than a living garden that could kill her? "You can only drink key lime gogurt after I die."

Lup grimaced. "That's disgusting!"

"Hey, it's my favourite! That's the least you can do for me."

"Then you must... I don't know, fuck, carry loose pudding on your pockets! Because I love pudding! Fuck you!"

Taako looked at her with the strongest poker face he had and slowly, without breaking eye contact, retrieved a handful of pudding from one of his pockets. Lup stared at him in horror. "What now, sis?"

"WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?!"

"Oh, but you can have it! It's your favourite!" And he threw it in her direction, missing by a good three feet and only succeeding in making Lup angry.

"Oh it's on, motherfucker!" she grabbed a handful of compost and threw it at him, hitting him right on his side.

"UGH, THAT'S DISGUSTING!" Taako reached for another bag of compost and attacked back, and the fight would have lasted for minutes if a plant hadn't smacked the both of them for throwing away their food. "That's on us."

* * *

 

“Anyway, after that- yo, whatcha lookin’ at?”

“Um?”

“You are smiling like an idiot.”

“Am I? Sorry, I just thought it was funny how after all your complaining you did end up adopting those plants.”

“You calling me a tsundere now?”

“I have no idea what that means.”

“Watch your mouth and let me finish my damn story.”

* * *

 

Taako did end up warming up to the garden sooner than later. Like, it wasn’t that bad once you go used to it, and they to you, and establishing boundaries was easier than Taako thought. Even Lup could roam around the greenhouse without fearing for her life in just a matter of months. Besides, after spending some time around them, you quickly found about their little quirks. For example, some of them prefered warmth and sunlight while other liked darker places. Some liked to be talked to, other prefered physical contact, a few liked both, and even less none. But there was one thing all of the plants had in common, and it was an irrational fear of storms.

Thunder roared through the glass of the greenhouse. A couple buds hid away behind bigger bushes, which tried to hide behind Taako, who was just sitting on a chair, minding his own business. "There, there, you little shits, it's just a cloud screaming."

It wasn't even a sunday, but he had to come and comfort the garden whenever storms came, and you didn't need to have a shit ton of awards on climate research to know that the weather did whatever the fuck it wanted, without any regards for people's schedules. Honestly, why did Taako bother with dates anymore?

The garden was chaos, but it would be worse if they left them alone. They would just get back to find every piece of furniture inside the room turned around. So here he was, on his own, because Lup was on the other side of the continent doing research so sorry couldn’t make it take care bye.

"You guys know I won't be here forever, right?" He really doubted any of the plants was paying attention to him, but he just kept going. Talking usually calmed them down. "Yeah, I know, we elves are known for staying around a while, but I'm still not immortal. And even if I were, I still got my own life! I can't keep coming here every time shit gets fucked, I am a successful chef!"

One little leaf poked behind him.

"That's right, little fella. One day you'll have to face your fears!"

It didn't help that just then another thunder shook the greenhouse, and it was back at hiding again. At least he tried.

"What's so scary to you? Is it all the shaking?"

The little leaf peeked out again, shaking sideways.

"So that's a no. Is it the rain? Are you afraid of flooding? Because we are far from the beach, you don't need to worry about that."

The leaf stayed still for a moment, thinking about it. Seemed like a good guess to the root (hehe) of the problem. But it finally shook again.

"It's the noise then, right? The thunder's rumble?"

The leaf nodded frantically.

"Welp, I was hoping it wasn't that," he leaned back on his chair. "No can do then, you'll have to learn to live with that for the rest of your existence. You can't mute that shit."

There was a moment of silence, if you didn't count the rain falling over the house. But no thunder, just Taako’s mind and the echo of his last words.

Then, it came to him. "Wait, shit, what if you _can_ mute it?!"

He didn't think twice. Taako got up and walked to the closest wall and tried to remember how the spell went. First you touch the surface of the object... shit, it only worked on whole parts, would he have to do it on every wall? Did he have enough slots to do that? Only one way to find out.

A light sparkled on his eyes and then the glass wall was shining, absorbing the light, and going opaque again.

Well that was easy. Did it work? Only one way to find out. Taako kicked the wall with all his might.

"What are you...?"

"MOTHERFUCKING SHIT MY LEG."

"... doing. You know what, I don't wanna know," Lup walked past him and checked on the plants. She was still dripping from the rain outside, and her hair was a mess, dirty with leaves, a bunch of dead bugs, a white feather poking from behind one ear, the usual.

"Nice to see you, didn't think you'd make it," he said, from the floor, holding his not-broken-but-surely-painful leg.

"I got a lift, have you seen the scissors? This one over here needs to shed one nasty stem."

"Uhhh I left them, on the table, behind the blackberries, sorry did you just say a lift? Weren't you _on the other side of the continent?_ "

Lup stopped on his way to the blackberries, suddenly very nervous under Taako's piercing glare. "Uhhhhhhhh weird magic shit?"

Taako shrugged, "Makes sense." Most of the pain had faded by now, and he still had the other four walls to charm, so he stood up again and dusted himself. "Lup, a little help here?"

"Sure, what is it?"

"Remember Lucretia's spell?,"

Lup froze. "Please tell me you didn't."

He walked to the adjacent wall and put his hands on its surface. "Watch this!" A flicker and a flash, the pulse of light expanded through the wall until all of it had absorbed it. "There you go! Now we've got an everything-proof garden, as long as everything comes from these two sides specifically."

"Taako!" Lup dropped the scissors and ran to the wall. "What have you done?! That spell is dangerous! They didn't let Lucretia publish it for a reason!"

"Woah, calm down!" Well, yeah, he really should have thought a bit more about it. "I mean, that was an anti-war measure, this isn't a tank."

"No, but it's a house full of _sentient plants_. God, I can't believe I need to point this out!"

"Come on, it should be fine! It's not like they can leave on their own and cause the apocalypse or something."

"But what if someone comes across them and none of us are around? If they get angry and block the door that person is as good as dead!"

Taako scoffed. "Well, that oughta teach them not to sneak into other people’s property."

Lup raised her arms like she was about to strangle him, but ultimately dropped them in resignation. "Okay, I get it, you care about them..."

"Woah there! No one said anything about _caring,_ " but the damage was done, the soy plant that had been eavesdropping on their conversation the whole time reached over to give Taako a hug. "Ugh, look what you've done!"

"That's what you get for making rush decisions! Look, just make sure you at least tell me before doing something like this again?"

That... seemed like the right thing to do. Now he felt bad for acting on a whim without taking Lup in consideration. "Yeah, sorry about that."

"It's fine, they seem happier now," and she pointed at the plants of the garden that were slowly leaning towards that mysterious corner where noises seemed to dim.

"Well, help me cover the other two then! I ran out of spell slots."

" _Already?_ You only did, like, two!"

"It's been a long day, I got bored!"

Lup went to do the other two, plus the ceiling, but not without complaining about her stupid, wasteful brother. The end result was astounding, all sound had been completely muffled by the spell and now the only traces left from the storm were the occasional flashes of light. The plants slowly left their places of hiding and so the garden went back to normal.

Taako was still amazed at the fruits (hehehe) of their work. "You think we can let them be for now?,"

"They seem good to me. Wanna catch dinner?"

"Hell yeah."

The shift from the glass room to the rest of the house was notorious. Taako and Lup had dinner under the sound of rain, wind, and thunder. Lup's soup tasted even better in the cold weather.

Moments like these where they could just sit to eat and chat were rare lately, it felt nice to be back home, whether that was at the top of a mountain or there at the beach. For the twins, home was anywhere they could cook a good meal together.

Before noticing, Taako had emptied his plate. He helped himself to a second serving, "God, I missed your cooking. Nobody gets roasted vegetables like you do."

"The key," a flame burst from Lup's non-dominant hand, "is raw power."

"It's too bad I never learned how you do it, now that winter is here this could be a really great addition to the restaurant's menu."

Taako digged into his plate like he hadn’t just eaten. He was so busy stuffing his mouth he didn’t notice the hesitance in Lup, as she gathered the courage to talk up.

"Actually, Taako, may I ask you something?" Taako's answer consisted of an affirmative grunt. Lup breathed in and out a couple times before speaking up, and when she did so, her voice was firm. "I want to go back to the restaurant."

Taako almost spitted all the contents of his mouth. "Wha-ha-hat?! You want to what?!"

"I want to work with you at the restaurant," she repeated even more determined now. "I know it's been ages and you probably have more than enough help by now, but I promise I'll be a good addition!"

No doubt about that, Taako's impulse was to tell her yes, of course she was welcome back at the restaurant, but there was an elephant in the room and he had to acknowledge it first. "What about your research?"

Lup smiled, but it was... not an usual smile. "It's done.”

“What do you mean ‘done’? You are working with climate change, isn't that, like, an everyday thing? Lup, did something happen?"

She was uneasy about something, Taako could tell. During dinner she would steal looks out of the window from time to time.

Lup stood up and walked towards said window now, contemplating the storm that was taking place outside. "It's just... there's nothing left for me to do anymore. At some point I wanted to understand everything, because I kept telling myself that would make Barry proud. But... it stopped being about Barry a long time ago, I was just hungry for knowledge," she put a hand against the glass and just a moment later another thunder came, making the window, and Lup's arm, shake. "I thought I could comprehend it once I found it."

There was something else, wasn't it? Something big, if it had managed to do what he couldn't after all these years.

"Are you sure about this?" asked Taako.

Lup retrieved his arms and turned back to him. "I did my part, and I want to believe the world is a better place because of it, but I've been doing this for what, a century now? That's a lot of time! And I want to do other things."

And again, Taako didn’t know that much about climate change, or science, or many things, really. But he knew Lup, and she seemed sincere. That was enough for him.

"Then welcome back."

The next day, Taako and Lup walked together to the restaurant for the first time in years, and they would keep on doing it for another fifty years more.

* * *

 

"There was nothing noteworthy after that, I think? I mean, just your regular amount of magic, food, and magic food shows around the world,” Taako took a sip from his coffee, which should have been cold by now. “We opened a second restaurant on the other side of the city at some point too."

Kravitz wanted to ask, but he didn't know how, or if he even should.

Taako raised an eyebrow. “Go on, Krav, I know you are dying to know."

"How did she die?"

"Ah, you are a very sharp man, Krav, has anyone ever told you that before?"

"Actually, yes…?"

“Well, you know, sometimes the world is a shitty place that takes away all the things you love in life. For Lup, it was her reputation as a scientist, and for me it was her.” Taako put his mug back on the table and crossed his arms. "Lup died in an accident. A storm caused a rockslide that hit the train she was in."

At this point in the conversation, Kravitz was only asking to confirm what he suspected. He didn’t feel right doing it, not in such an invasive way, but Taako was giving him the chance now. Whether he liked it or not, the facts pointed at one conclusion

"Krav, you know about this more than I do. What caused the end of the world? Was it the war? Magic? A demonic spell gone wrong?"

"... It was nature," Kravitz admitted.

Taako leaned back on his chair and crossed his arms again. "Exactly. And what did Lup spend her life researching? Weather patterns, climate change, all the ways nature can kill people," he raised his arms like it all was explained now. "Makes sense, doesn't it? A hundred years ago, they turned down her request to fund her development of a forecast system that could predict anomalies. Fifty years ago she realized the world was ending so she decided to quit and spend the rest of her days living a happy life with her dear brother. Two years ago, the weather started acting up, and she felt guilty because she had kept the secret from all of us for years. So, she tried to publish her findings, to warn the world. Lup was on the way the institute. The rockslide only hit _her_ wagon."

The room fell silent for a moment, between Taako thinking about the next part and Kravitz with just no idea of what to say.

"I had to clean up her shit, you know?," he continued, "Lup's study was just like she left it all those years ago, but I could never find the last of her research. I thought I misplaced or outright lost it, but now that I think about it, it's kinda obvious, right? She just wanted to do the right thing."

Without thinking, Kravitz put a hand on Taako's shoulder. Taako looked at him, surprised. No one said anything for a very awkward moment.

"Uh, I'm just, you are crying," was Kravitz very clever explanation.

Taako quickly reached to his own cheek, which, indeed, was wet. "Huh, embarrassing. Sorry you had to see that."

"No! I mean, you don't have to apologize. I'm sorry you had to go through all of that."

"Well, just the perks of surviving." Taako smiled at him, "You don't have to be so formal, Krav, you can hug me if you want."

Kravitz smiled too, coyly. "Do you want me to hug you?"

"That would be nice, yeah."

Kravitz moved his chair closer and before he could wrap his arm around Taako, he was the one being hugged. He let Taako have this, rubbing circles on his back.

Taako was also the first to let go, and the absence of his body heat made Kravitz more aware of his own lack of it than usual. Now that he looked a little better, Taako spoke up: “Listen, I’m pretty sure these fuckers up there have big agenda for the rest of the apocalypse, but they’ve already taken everything from me. I honestly believe the garden deserves to survive, because it _is_ alive, and fuck me I guess, I care a shit ton about them. But I’d be lying if I said I don’t also like the idea of sticking a huge middle finger to the whole of the pantheon’s divine faces. That’s probably a shitty reason to do anything, but you asked, and it’s what I have.

"You know the plan, now I need to know if I can count on you, because with or without your help, I’ll find a way to save that garden."

And it was up to him again. As much as Kravitz could sympathize with Taako, things hadn't changed. "We can't keep the garden a secret anymore once you take them out of the house."

"Figured."

"They might still die."

"It's worth a shot."

" _You_ might die."

"Isn't that what you want?"

The answer should have been yes right away.

Taako shrugged, "I'm going to die anyway if I don't do something."

"And I just might get caught by my boss helping a mortal break the pantheon’s plan."

"So... that a yes?"

Kravitz sighed, he was doing that a lot these days, but this one was the biggest, most tired sigh that had ever escaped his mouth. "Regrettably so."

Taako raised his arms and clapped. "Hell fucking yes! We are going to save that garden!"

In a faraway place, surrounded by ashes and charcoal that once were flowers and grass, a crow took flight. It didn't smile, because crows couldn't do that, but Istus was happy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OKAY PEEPS HEAR ME OUT: see that wordcount? next chapter is the ending, and after that therell be an epilogue of sorts. i mean it this time motherfuckers we are AT the end of this.  
> it might take longer than usual to update because its ten fucking thousand words long, but those of you whove been here since the begining: thank you for your patience, sorry for my narrative decisions, i love you  
> and those binge reading this after i finished it: well shit, greetings from the past, i hope its been a nice evening! :0


	10. The Garden

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The plan is set in motion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the end! Thank you for sticking around this far. <3
> 
> I should warn you, though, I don't know shit about gardening, or geology.
> 
> EDIT: Big CW for graphic violence at the end. They are fine but it might still shock you

The sky was redder in this part of the world.

“Well, it’s more like blood orange.”

Taako rolled his eyes. “If you want to be pretentious about it.”

The reason for this was pollution —more than usual, at least. Far at sea the residue washed away, and the result was a non-threatening shade of pink, but here in the heart of all volcanic activity it was something out of a horror movie. Whatever that was, Taako refused to tell Kravitz what he meant when he said that.

Speaking of the elf, he was currently walking behind Kravitz, holding his hand tight while stepping carefully after his every step. Walking was easier when he was alone. “Hey, slow down a little? I’m wearing heels.”

“Why did you think _that_ was a good idea? You knew we were going out today.”

Taako pouted. “Why, Kravitz, I wanted to look cute for our date, can you blame me?”

 _This is not a date_ , he wanted to say, but 1) They _were_ holding hands, even if just so Taako didn’t fall to his death at, quote, the world’s angry ground marmalade, unquote; and 2) arguing with him was useless. “If you don’t want to walk anymore, this place looks as good as any other to me.”

“No, no, it needs to be farther away, the air pollution blocks the sunlight,” Taako took his book, double checking just to be sure. “Yeah, bad stuff. It’s a shame these plants can’t survive on minerals only, this place is rich.”

He didn’t doubt Taako, it just… well, it made you think. Kravitz had seen with his own eyes the cycle of life around volcanoes, but sometimes it was just hard to believe life could sprout in a place as dead as this. It reminded Kravitz of the astral plane, all dark and silent. He wondered, just for a minute, if the other side would be like that too.

“Hey, Faerun to Kravitz,” Taako’s voice made him snap out of his thoughts. “Are you mental-monologuing again?”

Right, he had company now. “Is just that I noticed, we are walking close to the remains of a dragonborn village. Not even they could survive the eruption, but even so, the place wasn’t precisely paradise back in the day. I often found myself amazed by the way living beings found home in the most strange places.”

“Yeah, we are all a bunch of weirdos. Need I remind you of the murder garden I’ve got back home? And I’m the _third_ person that’s agreed to it.”

Kravitz laughed, “You’ve got a point.”

Well, at least it was nice having someone to talk about these apocalyptic sights.

“Over there!,” Taako pulled Kravitz’s arm and pointed at a plateau a couple miles ahead. Light fell over it in an almost celestial way. “Now that’s a divine sign if I’ve seen one.” Logic dictated that it was just the opening of the clouds over in the sky, but by all means, it was exactly what they needed. “Can you do your magic?”

Kravitz opened a rift, they jumped in and just a second later they were standing at the top of the plateau. The place was covered in a layer of petrified lava, although some poking around showed it wasn’t as thick as the area they were just in. This volcano had gone into eruption years before the actual end of the world, enough time for the lava to cool off, and right now the plateau stood as a big, black rock in the middle of an equally black landscape.

Taako walked around, exploring the place and asserting their surroundings. “Yep, I can work with this.” He scratched some of the soil and put it inside a bag, labeling it with a big ‘0’, and stored it in his pouch. “Remember Krav, if I pass out before we are done take a sample from the soil and just get me to the island,” he sat on the floor, hands in front of him, and began channeling magic into the soil.

The process didn’t seem as taxing as raising the land, and Taako took his time now. He kneeled there for a good five minutes with his eyes closed. Even if Kravitz couldn’t see any immediate changes, he felt impressed. So, they were actually doing this now.

Kravitz still doubted this would work.

After about eight minutes, Taako finally looked at him and said, “Welp, that’s all the magic I’ve got today,” he took another sample, labeled it ‘01’, and then dusted his hands andattempted to get up. His legs gave in and he stumbled.

Kravitz caught him before he fell to the floor again and helped him stand on his feet.

Taako looked embarrassed, but he tried to mask it with some of his usual teasing. “Aw, Krav, what a gentleman.”

It was fun when he did that. Kravitz enjoyed the rare occasions Taako actually let his guard down “Careful there, didn’t you say you’ll have to make this trip for weeks? Maybe it’s too big for you.”

“Don’t get cocky with me, I still have a lot of juice in me.”

“Enough to walk back home?”

“Oh, oh no, actually just now I feel like falling again. Carry me?”

Kravitz was not carrying Taako, but he felt pity for him, so he supported him by his side on the short way back.

The world was quiet today, fortunately. Maybe it would stay like that long enough for the plan to go nicely.

* * *

 

Later, over dinner, Taako showed Kravitz the results of their first day of their operation so far. “There, see this? The concentration of volcanic shit has lowered about fifty percent!”

“Really?!” Kravitz looked his calculations over. He frowned. “Uh, that’s actually five percent.”

“Shit, are you serious?” Taako stared at his own writing. Kravitz couldn’t help to laugh at him. “Oh, shut up!”

“Sorry, sorry. For all your expertise in the arcane arts, one would think you’d be better at math.”

“I chose Arcana as my field specifically so I wouldn’t have to do numbers.”

“And cooking? Aren’t you supposed to know rations for that?”

“That’s different.”

“How?”

“You just look at the people you are cooking for and throw in ingredients until there’s enough for everyone.”

Kravitz stared at him. He couldn’t be serious.

Taako snorted. “I’m fucking with you!”

Kravitz sighed, “ _Anyway_ , how long till it’s fit for gardening?”

“It depends on what we want, I still need to consult with the guys. It should be less than, uh, ten, fifteen…”

“Twenty.”

“Twenty days! We don’t want to get rid of _all_ the volcanic shit.”

Wasn’t there a proper term for that? Not that Kravitz knew anything about gardening, or geology. “Well, I guess we are good then. Unless the volcano suddenly comes back to life and there’s another eruption before that,” he laughed teasingly, but Taako stared at Kravitz in horror. “I-I’m kidding, sorry, that was out of place-”

“No, Krav, behind you!”

Kravitz turned around, to the window. Perched on the fence outside was a black crow, staring directly at them.

_Shit._

“What the fuck! Is that-?!”

“Not a real crow. I’m sorry, I need to leave _right now_ ,” Kravitz got up from the table without finishing the rest of his plate and ran out of the house as fast as he could. The crow was waiting for him outside, cawing when it saw him. How long had it been waiting? Did it hear their conversation?

Kravitz tried his best to look as non-suspicious as he could, but these birds could smell your fear. Literally. They were minions of the queen of the underworld, after all. “Hey, hello there, is everything alright?”

 _Caw!_ That’s to say, _The Queen wishes to speak with you._

A rift opened for the bird to leave, having completed its mission. Kravitz was glad to see it go.

Right next to him, through the window, he saw Taako, watching the scene with curiosity while he picked at his own plate. The elf mouthed in between chews, _Everything alright?_

Kravitz mouthed back, _My boss;_ it made Taako grimace.

Since he had no option but to follow her orders, Kravitz opened a rift and jumped in.

Minutes later, he was kneeling in a cave, safe from the storm that was taking place in land. Five black feathers were scattered around him. The connection picked up fast, which was reasonable considering the Queen herself had called for him.

_“Kravitz, my reaper, I’m glad you answered my message so quickly.”_

“It is only my duty to follow your orders, my goddess,” fortunately, the trip was enough for Kravitz to gather himself and calm down. With some luck, the Raven Queen would never know he was hiding something —if the crow never told her about their conversation at the table. “What is the matter?”

_“I don’t know, Kravitz, why don’t you tell me?”_

Kravitz’s redundant stomach fell. Shit, shit, shit, this wasn’t happening. “I’m sorry? I’m not quite sure I understand what you mean.”

_“What I mean,” she said, “is that you haven’t called in weeks. You’ve skipped the last two sundays, dear. Is everything alright?”_

Oh. Oh, thank goodness. Kravitz had to repress a sigh of relief, but his entire body relaxed after hearing that. “Really? I guess I lost track of time.” That was true, at least. After the glass broke, Taako stopped asking Kravitz to leave on sundays as he now spent almost all the time tending to the plants, and Kravitz had kept himself busy taking care of the house —and Taako, too. Kravitz couldn’t believe himself, forgetting one of the most crucial parts of his routine like this. “I’m sorry, my goddess. I promise it won’t happen again.”

The Raven Queen cackled. _“Oh, no, Kravitz, you don’t need to apologize. I am your boss, not your caretaker. You don’t need to keep me updated on your personal life,”_ there was a rustle of feathers on the other side, not from the goddess herself but someone else, probably one of her crows. _“I feel like I must apologize, though. My messenger over here tells me you were having dinner when I called for you.”_

Kravitz laughed, trying really hard not to make obvious how nervous he was. But the Raven Queen’s tone wasn’t accusing, maybe the crow hadn’t heard them after all? “It’s fine, Taako knows I have responsibilities to attend to.”

The Raven Queen cooed in a way that made Kravitz really, _really_ uncomfortable. _“I see you are on a first name basis with the survivor now. How come I’m just finding out his name?”_

“Oh. Uh… ” Kravitz wanted to slap himself. How could he let that slip out so easily? “Well, it happens after spending so much time around someone.” Why did he say it _that way_?! “I-I mean, you know-”

 ~~~~“Kravitz, it was I who told you to take it easy and make the wait less hard on you. I mean, I was going to ask about your trip with the survivor— Taako, this morning. But I get how mortals can be. They get bored, right? You told me he asks you to take him places. _”_

“I definitely didn’t mean it that way.”

_“No, Kravitz, it really is fine. Just remember to call once in awhile.”_

In a day or two he would be glad his boss didn’t question the actual nature of his absence, but right now he only wished for the storm outside to come crashing into the cave and take him far away, preferably out of the planar system. “Of course, my goddess,” he lowered his head in a show of respect and ended the call.

Minutes later, he was back on the cottage; well, the trip was instantaneous, but he took the time to calm his mind again. Taako was still sitting at the table, reading his notes, writing some more. He wasn’t too focused, though, as he noticed Kravitz right away. “Hey there, is…” he gestured at his book, just in case there was another crow around that could hear them, “everything okay?”

“Yeah, she just wanted to check on me.”

Taako sighed in relief, “Well, good! I kept your plate warm.”

Kravitz didn’t feel like eating anymore. But then again, he never did, and yet Taako spared some of his emergency reserve on him. So, still feeling awkward, and a little weird inside, he finished his plate and thanked Taako. His existence could be a mess right now, but he had manners.

* * *

 

As the transmutation phase of the plan progressed, Taako took the soil samples to the real experts of the house: the plants. Five rows of three pots laid on the glass room floor for them to see, while Taako carefully carried one of the tomato plants into the first pot, labeled ‘A1’ (the labeling went through A-E and 1-3), and made it hover above.

The plant moved its roots curiously, reaching for the soil with them, slowly at first, and then retrieved them quickly.

“How was that? Too much? Too little?”

The plant didn’t really know how to answer, but a no was a no, so Taako took it to the next sample.

They repeated this with every pot, and almost every type of plant on the green house.

Kravitz was there too. He wasn’t dealing with the plants directly yet, even if they acted nicer towards him these days. Once in awhile Taako would ask him to refill the pots with soil and keep count of which plants liked which samples. There were lots of plants, so the process took almost since dawn to dusk.

Once everyone had given their opinion, the two of them retreated to the living room to compare notes. “So,” Taako had a diagram on his notebook of the pots’ placement in the greenhouse and was now circling a section of four, “these have got the most matches, right?”

Kravitz nodded. “If my calculations are right…”

“They better be, my man.”

“… That section should account for about sixty four percent of the total of the garden.”

Taako wrote down some stuff on his book, mumbling something about estimated dates of transmutation for an area as big as the plateau, plus his usual magic jargon. “Good! That leaves our main goal at seventy percent!”

“There’s still the issue of the thirty six percent left, though. Those four samples were close enough in range that most plants won’t mind the subtle differences between them, but what about those farther away from that area?”

“I’ll just make a special zone for those, it shouldn’t be that hard.”

“Can you do that? Wouldn’t there be a mix up?”

“The place is big enough to host everyone, Krav. Besides,” he pointed up, “don’t forget I’ve got someone backing me up.”

Kravitz knew about Pan’s powers, but he still had his doubts about it. It wasn’t like he could offer any better options, though, Taako was the closest they had to an expert. Besides, it was phase two of their plan that concerned him the most: “When are you going to ask Pan to lift the guard?”

Taako looked at the sea through the window, which was as quiet as ever, and then in the general direction of the glass room. “As soon as we take the first plant from here.”

“And how long do you think it’ll take to move them all?”

“I don’t know,” he shrugged, “A day, maybe?”

“There’s _a lot_ of them.”

“It’s what it took to place them in the pots, I don’t think it’ll be much different. We’ll just carry them through the rift.”

Kravitz crossed his arms. “I guess, but-”

“Then it’s set!” Taako got up again, ignoring Kravitz entirely. “Let’s just keep up the work. I’ll probably need a day of rest for every four, but if we keep up this rhythm, we’ll reach our desired concentration in, uh…”

“Two weeks.”

“Two weeks! And then, phase two!”

And he left to his room, without even staying to hear Kravitz’s input.

Well, nothing left to do for him.

But.

Still.

Kravitz didn’t know what worried him more, if the prospect of failure, or the fact that he actually wanted this plan to work.

* * *

 

But just because things actually seemed to work lately didn’t mean the world would make it easy for the two of them. This was the apocalypse, and Pan’s protection or not, the weather still had business to attend to at the island.

One day there was a storm.

It wasn’t a big, civilization-killing storm. As far as storms went, it wasn’t even big for pre-apocalypse standards. Just your regular amount of rain, wind, and thunder. But it was, however, the first one since the cracking of the glass. And the plants, obviously, didn’t take it well after a century of peace.

"Calm down! Calm down, nothing is going to happen to you!"

"Taako, a little help here?"

"I'm coming!” Taako turned to the berries, “Just stay put, I swear, nothing bad is going to happen. We've been through this before-"

"Taako, seriously, help."

"JUST ONE SECOND. I'll read you a book, do you want that? It can be a detective story, you guys like those, right?"

"TAAKO."

"God, I'm surrounded by fucking children." Taako crossed the glass room only to find Kravitz standing still between a group of bushes and vines. Taako glared at them. "I can't leave you alone, can I?

"They _threatened_ me."

Taako sighed, "They are _scared_ , Krav. Just keep telling them everything is going to be alright, please? This is a fucking mess, I _need you_ to get through this."

Maybe abusing Kravitz’s goodwill wasn’t the right thing to do, but Taako still felt relieved when the reaper sighed in resignation and gave it a try, despite his current situation. "Erm, it's going to be alright, see? I work on the field, and trust me, nobody has ever died because of a little thunder… well, I mean, heart attacks. But you don't, uh, have one?," he looked at Taako like asking for his validation.

By the way the leaves stopped ruffling, he knew it was working. "Keep it up, buddy, you are working magic on these guys. Can I leave now?"

"Yeah, I think I can deal with them for a while."

"Good," Taako was going to leave again, but he stopped to say one last thing: "Hey, thank you, really. It means a lot to them."

Kravitz smiled awkwardly. "I'm glad they've finally accepted me."

"Eh, I wouldn't use that term just yet. Tolerance is more like it."

"I'll take anything that means they won't try to destroy my corporeal form."

"That would be a pity, wouldn't it?," Taako winked at Kravitz and went back to tend to the other side of the garden.

* * *

 

_The door to the green house was still open since his last visit three months ago. Taako dreaded their reaction when they saw him, but if he didn't take the leap now, he was never going to set afoot inside the glass room again._

_So, he squeezed on the handle of the sprinkler and walked forward. "Hey there, did you miss m- WOAH SHIT."_

_A vine had tangled itself on Taako's leg and lifted him up. It wasn't one of the thorny ones, fortunately, and the plant wasn't putting actual effort into hurting him, but its hold was strong, and it placed him in the perfect place for most of the inhabitants of the garden to see him. See him, and judge him._

_"Okay, I know I went missing on you for a while. I never call, that's so rude of me."_

Tap, tap, tap. _A plant hanging from one of the riels at the top called to his attention, a sweet pea. It looked sickly, its colour dull and leaning towards brownish; flowers were supposed to bloom that time of the year, but its branches had barely managed to sprout some crawny buds._

_Taako honestly wondered how they had managed to survive for so long without him. Well, pannist gardens were made of something else. Or were turned into something else, whatever weird nature magic was involved. "Listen, I'm really sorry I left you all behind. But I'm back now, and… I plan to stay. At least while I get my shit together.” He sighed, “You are basically all I have left now."_

_One of the plans gestured to the entrance, which was still open, though nobody else would come through._

_With effort, Taako managed to say it out loud for the first time in months: "Lup's gone."_

_They understood._

_Taako was put down slowly, the plant that had grabbed him even took care of turning him around before hitting the floor._

_"Thanks, for understanding, and not killing me, all that jazz."_

_The plants nodded and then slowly retreated to their pots, but not before calling attention to their state again. Taako would need to refill his sprinkler, make a ton of trips that day and the ones to come._

_But taking care of the guys seemed like a good start, one to slowly regain a grip on his life. He had made a promise, after all._

_And, at least, the plants understood his grief. They were the only creatures who could outlive an elf._

* * *

 

The day finally came.

Kravitz and Taako were inside the glass room, the latter talking to Pan through the plants. It was an… _unorthodox_ method of communication, if Kravitz was one to judge, but he supposed no all gods had the elegance of the Raven Queen. Maybe she had a thing for the dramatic, but Kravitz would be lying if he said it wasn’t one of the reasons why he followed her.

"We are done here, my dude. Do you know where we are going, right?"

The vanilla nodded.

"Good! Then you can begin blessing that place, we'll take care of the rest."

Kravitz stared at the plant, waiting for some sort of sign, like a nod or small shake. It didn’t come, as the vanilla didn’t have anything to do with it. However, Kravitz found he could _feel_ the change, gradually. It was like the air around them got lighter, the light from the sun brighter as it passed through the glass, and the sound of the sea grew, like it once had been muffled. Kravitz hadn’t noticed before, how everything around the island was dimmed, not even in comparison to the rest of the world. In his eagerness to solve every mystery in the island, he overlooked the biggest clue of them all. And now it was useless to him.

Knowing now the real effect of Pan's protection was… worrying. Could they survive even a day without it?

"Well, no time like the present, right?," Taako rolled his sleeves up and picked the first plant that would be taken to their new home, a strawberry bush. "Hang in there, babe, we are going to walk to the other side of the world. Kravitz, do the honors?"

A rift opened in the middle of the room, and Taako walked through it with the pot on his arms. It felt weird. Kravitz would have given anything months ago to open a rift into the glass room, but that was also in the past now. He picked another pot of strawberries and carried it through the portal.

The place was silent. The two of them stood there, quiet for a moment of incertitude. Out in the open, anyone could see what they carried. The secret was out.

But nothing happened, not immediately at least, so Taako just set in motion again, following his own markings around the extension of the plateau for the types of soil needed. "Come on, Krav!"

The sky was clouded that day, but it would soon clear up thanks to Pan's protection. For now, they had enough peace and quiet to work on their mission.

So Kravitz followed Taako, who was having a good time ordering him around.

"Walk faster, but be careful, these guys are a big mess to move around with the extra support and shit."

Kravitz followed Taako’s every step, taking especial care of not messing up and angering the plant. "Couldn't we have picked something easier to start?"

"No way, strawberries are petty as fuck. If I didn't pick them first they would get uncooperative later. Isn't that right, you little shits?"

The strawberries shook, but they didn't seem angry. Kravitz wondered if that was the way plants laughed.

"Fair enough," he said, "any more advice on dealing with these?"

"Yeah, watch your valuables or you might fall victim of a strobberie."

Kravitz grimaced. "Ugh, that pun was terrible."

Taako pointed behind him, "Tell that to the vine sneaking on your pocket."

"Wha- Hey!" While Kravitz was tending to his strawberry, it stretched one of its vines in full stealth mode and managed to pick one of the feathers he kept there. Kravitz snatched it, "I need these to keep in touch with my boss!"

The vine shook again, and Kravitz was now sure it was laughing at him. It went back on its own to the stick that supported the rest of its sisters.

Plant after plant, they carried them to their new homes, and Taako told Kravitz about all of them.

"Tomatoes and basils are besties, never keep them apart," he explained, as he was carrying one tomato plant while Kravitz carried it's companion basil closely. "You need to stay with me on this one, I don't make the rules, maybe hold my hand while you are at it."

"Of course, we don't want you falling face first again, right?"

"Okay, that was ONE time."

The tomato seemed to remember something too as it leaned closer to Kravitz's basil, which promptly ruffled its leaves, but it was shaking in the same way the strawberries had.

"See? They can't be apart, that's vegetable cruelty."

"Aren't tomatoes fruits, though?"

"Fruits, honorary vegetables, and perfect for pasta. Can't live without 'em!"

The blackberry bush was the most uncooperative of the bunch, because it was a tsundere, was Taako's explanation.

"You know, thorny on the outside, soft and sweet on the inside."

“Oh, so that’s what it means. Is it gardening terminology?”

“Yep, you may use this one word as much as you want, especially in front of other gardening experts.”

Next up were the mimosas.

"I need you to hold the base and I'll take care of the rest, this one needs a lot of reassuring," and just like he said, the plant shrunk on itself when Kravitz walked too close.

"Woah, that's… exactly what I expected. Finally something acting like it should."

Taako snorted. "Kravitz, weren't you taught not to judge a plant by its name?"

"I’m pretty sure it should the opposite."

"Hashtag not all plants."

"I give up on this subject."

By the time the sun had setted, they had managed to move three fifths of the inhabitants of the room. It wasn't dark enough to make their work impossible yet, but Taako was still frustrated when he saw his calculations go wrong.

"Ugh! Boy, am I bad at math!," he watched uselessly as the last light of day dimmed away. "Okay, small correction, this might take more than one day."

Kravitz counted the plants left on the room. They did move most of them in one day, that wasn't bad for just two guys improvising their survival. But Kravitz was still worried of what might come if they didn't hurry. "I know a light cantrip, would that help?"

Taako hummed, looking at the sky, then at the rest of the plants. "Yes, it would. Help me carry a couple more and we are done for today."

Back in the house, they revised the plan of action over a quick dinner. "Tomorrow we get up earlier," said Taako. "We need to get on with the rest by sunrise- no, before that, just when the sky starts clearing up again."

"Is there anything else we can get done before that?"

"Don’t think so, I already anticipated all the work I could so we focused on carrying them to the other side today," he groaned, leaning back and covering his face with both hands. “Ugh, I really didn’t think it would take this long!”

Kravitz thought about something, anything to speed things up. "What if you cook tonight? That would save time over the day, we had to take an hour for lunch."

Taako snapped his fingers. "That's good thinking! I'll pack us lunch in cute boxes, just like my romance novels."

"You don't need to-"

"- Cook for two," Taako interrupted him. "For the nth time, Krav, we eat together in this house, you like it or not. And I know you do."

Kravitz sighed, "Yeah, I do."

"Good! Then it's all set. I'll spend the night in the green room in case anything else comes up. The plants at the other side should be safe for the night, but…”

"I'll look after them," said Kravitz.

"Excellent! We are set then. If anything happens on the other side, get me there immediately, alright? Just open a rift inside the room and I'll get there in a blink."

Kravitz nodded and opened a rift. He was about to step inside when Taako called for him one last time.

"Wait!"

Kravitz turned around, "Did I forget something else?"

"Yeah," Taako closed his eyes and pointed at his cheek, "my goodnight kiss."

"I'll be leaving then, see you tomorrow."

"WAIT! Okay, seriously now. I already talked with the guys about the move, but they might still feel anxious," he ran towards one of the bookshelves and picked something from it. Unlike most of the books in the house, it wasn't big and heavy, but a paperback copy of a light novel. "Read them this, it's their favourite book. Well, it's the only one I've ever read to them, all my shit is academia or gardening stuff, and they find that as interesting as you would an anatomy book."

"I actually like those. Most humanoid species share a lot in common once you take the principal differences away. Did you know orcs have five extra bones on their feet?"

Taako covered his face with one hand. "Ugh, nevermind, I forgot you weren't an actual person anymore. Just read them the dumb book."

Kravitz took the book, its cover read _Caleb Cleveland: Kid Cop._ "Is that everything for tonight then?"

"Yep, you may go now, my man," Taako waved goodbye and walked towards the back hall.

An idea popped into Kravitz's mind, and before he had time to think better of it, he caught up to Taako and said, "Wait, one last thing."

"Oh, yeah, what is-?"

Kravitz kissed his cheek. "Good night," and then he ran to the rift.

He didn't stay long enough to see the look of absolute shock in Taako's face, nor the blush that quickly spread from his neck to the tip of his ears. Kravitz did, however, hear when he yelled:

"WHAT. WHAT THE FUCK. YOU CAN'T DO THAT. WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU-"

And then he was at the plateau, alone and in silence.

He walked to the garden-in-progress, book in hand, and said, "Story time?"

The plants nodded enthusiastically, and so Kravitz took a sit next to them, infused the book with a light cantrip, and read: " _Chapter one: The Case of the Stolen Bike…_ "

* * *

 

_Life at the beach was painfully slow at first._

_Just getting up in the mornings to make himself breakfast seemed like a chore. He got caught in the awful habit of sleeping; he hated it, but it was a good way to kill time between days. It left him feeling dizzy, and waking up was always confusing. Why wasn't he on his own room? Why was everything so quiet? The aftermath only made it harder on himself._

_But everytime he felt like staying in bed all day, his own voice came to mind, scolding Lup for neglecting herself, and then she scolding him, even longer ago, when she was the responsible one._

_So he got up, day after day, and forced himself to do something._

_Sometimes he left, got aboard the Starblaster and sailed around the shore for a couple hours. His main goal on those times was to visit the closest town to do some grocery shopping, because walking those ten minutes was a pain in the ass. With time, he started taking longer trips, visiting far away places for a day. He bought books, too, something to keep himself busy, but they were quickly discarded away in a pile on the floor of the library._

_Most days he spent inside the greenhouse, taking care of the plants and talking, to them or to himself. Once in awhile he would mention going back to his old home and reopening the restaurant "I mean, they must miss me so bad. I was one of, if not_ the _best chef around. You gotta trust me on this."_

_He missed cooking for others, but… not too much. Not yet._

_But even though he managed to build a routine for himself, Taako honestly didn't know how long he would last living like that. He worried… no, he knew one day he would give up._

_And then, the first disaster came._

_News that a sudden tempest was approaching the seaside made it to most beach settlements, but Merle's house was in between towns, and Taako wasn’t going on a grocery trip that day, so he really had no way to know. When the rain started, he attributed it to a normal storm, nothing to worry about ever since they had reinforced the glass in the green house._

_The sea, however, wasn't behaving normally, with waves that crashed violently at the coast and coming closer and closer to the cottage. Taako was, unfortunately, sleeping when it started banging at the front door._

_"What the fuck?!," he left his room at the sound of the door slamming open, only to see the first floor flooding. Water infiltrated the entrance easily, and the intensity of the current disrupted objects all around._ Shit, the house!

_…_

_"SHIT, THE PLANTS!"_

_Taako tried to walk to the front door and close it, but even getting there was proving to be way more difficult than he thought, and the water just kept rising! He grabbed onto one of the doors to the rooms at the front, the library, which was completely flooded too. He saw his newly bought tomes getting helplessly ruined forever, or at least the ones at the bottom…_

_And then, he noticed, the title of the book at the top of the pile:_ Nature Magic. _That was it! Maybe he’d find something in there that could help him!_

_He ran to grab it before the current knocked the pile off and browsed through its pages frantically. Something, anything! Just to make the water stop!_

_"Aha!," he memorized the instructions and prayed that it would work, then left the book somewhere high, held his breath and ducked under the water, hoping for the best roll of his life._

_The floor beneath his feet shook and suddenly the current weakened, until water started flowing back where it came from. Taako raised his head and gasped, then quickly ran to the nearest window and watched as the tidal wave surrounded the house just by five feet. He was now standing above it!_

_After the adrenaline ran out, though, he fell onto the closest chair and blacked out._

~~~~Taako woke up five hours later with a cold and a horrible back pain. The first thing he did was retrieve some dry clothes from his room, then he would have to check on the garden.

_It was not as damaged as the rest of the house, fortunately. The fact that the entrance wasn't directly connected to the hall slowed the flow of water considerably, and only the area immediately close to the glass door was wet. This was fine, Taako cleaned up, helped himself to some healthy snacks from the blackberry bush, then went outside to check for any damage on the infrastructure. The Starblaster had been pushed to the house and was a little damaged too, but it was nothing Taako couldn't fix. For now, he was glad the place had survived the flood._

_It wouldn't be the last, though._

* * *

 

First hour in the morning, a rift opened inside the glass room.

"Rise and shine! Well, it's still dark in this part of the world, but the other side is already clear enough for us to get back to…"

_Splat._

Kravitz looked down where the sound had come from. He had stepped right into a pool of water.

He didn't think twice before running to the crack. The last time he saw it, it extended to the ceiling, but now it had a small hole the size of a pea at the bottom corner, through which big part of the leaking had come from. But there was no flux now, just the remains of a leak that had already been taken care of.

Kravitz could put the pieces together with just that. There had been another flooding.

"Taako! Are you in here?!"

No answer came from the room, except for the rustling of leaves from the plants that were still there. They were all snuck together, or at least as close as the pots let them. One of them pointed to the door and Kravitz didn't even think before opening a rift to get to the living room.

In a flash the scenery in front of him changed, and just like he had thought, Taako was lying on a couch, sleeping. His boots were discarded on the side, on top of a small pool of water, and the bottom part of his pants were still wet, too. Kravitz thought twice before waking him up, the land rising spell took its toll on Taako, but if things were already that bad they had to get moving _now_.

"Taako, wake up."

No reaction. Fuck, why were things like this already?

Kravitz walked to the couch and put a hand on Taako's shoulder, shaking him not too violently. "Taako!"

The elf grunted. "Ugh, stop making so much noise, my head hurts."

"The garden!"

That was it. Taako opened his eyes and sat up on the couch. The sudden reaction made him sick, he took a hand to his head and covered his eyes, grunting some more. "Fuck, I hate this."

"Taako, the glass room is flooded."

"I know, jesus fuck, Kravitz, just _shut up_ for two seconds."

Kravitz sat on the floor awkwardly while Taako gathered himself. Outside the window, he could see the sea crashing against the shore violently. No signs of another flooding, though, but he wouldn't count on their luck just yet.

He got up and left Taako alone for a minute, and when he got back he carried a glass of water. "Here."

Taako eyed the glass through his fingers, then at Kravitz. "More water? That's just what I need."

Oh, shit, should he have thought better before bringing in the first thing he could think of? When was the last time he had a migraine? He didn't know about these things. "I'm sorr-"

"Oh, no, Krav, I'm kidding, just kidding, see? Water is fine, cool actually, I'm sorry I got you worried."

Kravitz sat down, sighing in relief. "The fact that you are joking about this means you feel better now."

"Yeah, can't let myself be down for long, that's the attitude that killed the world."

A voice echoed into Kravitz's mind: _We tried to stop this, but, as you can see, we failed. So we gave up._

"Welp, let's get moving!"

On the way to the glass room, Kravitz took a glance to the world outside. The sea still raged, and although it was still dark, the sky was clearing up, little by little. Which is why, in contrast, the clouds forming in the far horizon seemed pitch black.

Kravitz walked faster.

The first thing Taako did once they walked into the room was vanish the small pool of water that hadn’t drained itself after he raised the land. “Risk of slipping safely contained.”

"Thank you. We need to act fast, a flood is the lesser of our conc-”

"Caw!"

Both of them jumped. There was a crow waiting in the middle of the room, perched on one of the rails.

_No, fuck, not now!_

"What the-? How did you get here!," Taako ran towards the bird and tried to scare it away with his umbrella.

"Taako, wait! Don't attack it!"

Too late, the point of the umbrella was already lit. The crow saw this and it cawed again, and three new rifts opened around it from which more crows flew off. The first crow jumped from the rail and they all went after Taako.

"Oh, you brought friends? Like that's gonna help you, fuckers! I can take on all of you!"

Taako pointed at the crows with his umbrella, the birds circled him, the plants on the room panicked.

"No!" Kravitz walked between the crows and Taako and materialized his scythe.

"Good thinking Krav! Let's beat those little shits!"

"TAAKO, STOP SWINGING THAT DAMN UMBRELLA." Taako stared at him in shock, but he didn't have the time to deal with that now. "And you," he said to the crows, "you are here for me, right? Just tell me what's going on and leave."

The first crow landed in front of Kravitz and cawed. _You are in trouble!_

The rest followed suit, _You are in trouble! You are in trouble! You are in trouble!_

"Tell the Raven Queen I'll talk to her later."

Caw! _She wants to talk now!_

"Here?! I can't-"

Caw! Caw! Caw! Caw!

"Fine!" He dropped his scythe, which turned to dust before touching the floor, and grabbed a handful of feathers from his pocket.

"Woah, are you serious?!" Taako tried to approach Kravitz but one crow flew in front of him and cawed until he backed away. "Alright! I'm walking away, just shut up!"

Kravitz kneeled and waited. The connection picked up almost immediately, to no surprise to him, and the guttural voice of the Raven Queen spoke up. No yelling, no cursing, none of those things beneath a goddess. Just two words: _"Explain. Now."_

Kravitz looked at the crows, back together in front of him, judging Kravitz; then, he saw the plants, still confused and hissing at the presence of these creatures that weren't quite as alive as them; and finally, he looked at Taako, still behind him. He was… afraid? Kravitz didn't blame him. It only took the pantheon a day to find out about their plans and send someone.

There was nothing else he could do now. "Istus."

The Raven Queen understood. _"She got you too, didn't she?"_

"Ask her yourself, she probably knows you are aware now-"

_"No, Kravitz, I want to hear it from you. Why did you turn on me? Hiding this for weeks, acting under another goddess' orders!"_

"I didn't do it for her!" he tried to explain. "Istus said…"

Kravitz stopped.

_"What, Kravitz? What did she tempt you with? Was it power? A place on her court? Have you become so greedy in your time as a reaper that you wanted more?"_

Kravitz turned around. Taako was still there, listening to their conversation. He was looking at Kravitz, still confused, still afraid.

_“Speak up.”_

Kravitz looked at Taako when he did, "Istus said the survivor couldn't die until his mission was carried away."

Taako's eyes opened wide as he was hit with the realization. Kravitz turned his back on him again.

 _"I see,"_ said the Raven Queen. There was no further emotion in her voice. _"You were just doing your job all along. That's so like you."_

"That’s right. If you would just let me back to our task, my goddess-"

_"That won't be necessary."_

A cold chill ran through Kravitz's spine.

_“I should have listened to you back then. You’ve already done more than enough for me, your retirement was long due.”_

"Wait, my goddess, you can't mean-"

_"I'm giving you permission to kill the survivor now."_

"EXCUSE ME?!"

“No!,” Kravitz stood up. The crows ruffled their feathers at this but did nothing else.

_“This job is obviously taking its toll on you. I thought you could get over it, but if you are so desperate as to ally yourself with Istus’ ridiculous plan, you might as well get this done now and cease this madness before someone less patient than me comes after you.”_

“But it is against the rules to-”

 _“Don’t talk to me about the rules of_ my _domain.”_

“Now, hold the fuck up!”

Kravitz turned around, staring at Taako in shock. Oh, goddess, no, this was taking the worst possible turn. “Taako, please don’t get involved-”

“You are literally talking about _my life_.” Taako shoved Kravitz to the sade and made room for himself inside his circle, “Hey, Raven ma’am, can you hear me?”

There was silence at first. _“Are you the survivor?”_

“My name is Taako, just in case Krav didn’t mention it.”

“Please don’t call me that in front of her.”

_“Silence, Kravitz.”_

Kravitz stuttered, embarrassed.

_“I know your name and what you’ve done to my servant. I admit your survival has surprised even me, but this tomfoolery ends now. Kravitz will kill you before the world itself does.”_

“Um, how about, no fucking way.” Kravitz wanted to slap him for talking to his goddess like that, but Taako didn’t seem to know or care about his words right now. He was just being his usual, stubborn self, and it was going to cost him his life this time. “See, I don’t care about the other gods, especially this Istus gal, who should have consulted _me_ before going around giving people quests about my garden. But my dude Pan has been backing me up this whole time with his natural magic, so if you want to take it against someone why not bother him instead? I’m just some guy who wants to make sure his plants don’t fucking die.”

The Raven Queen actually listened to him, waiting until Taako was done before speaking up again. _“I understand you mortals have a likeness for hopeless causes. Kravitz has mentioned you like dangerous places.”_

“Oh, so he actually talks to you about me? Funny how he never talks to me about anything.”

_“This mission of yours is futile, and both Istus and Pan know this. That garden shouldn’t have lasted this long, and it’s just a matter of time for the rest of the pantheon to take hands on the matter. I’m giving both a choice here: if Kravitz kills you now, we’ll look past your offense and only place the blame on Istus and Pan.”_

Taako looked at him, raising an eyebrow. Beyond that, his expression was unreadable, but it was enough to turn Kravitz’s stomach into a big knot. It was the same look he had given him so many times before. He was making himself an idea of what it might have meant, and he didn’t like it. Averting his gaze again, Taako crossed his arms and spoke up one more time. “If that’s so, then fine by me, we all know he’s been _dying_ to finish me off.”

Kravitz stared at him. “Taako, wait…”

“However! I have a condition.”

The Raven Queen growled. _“You have a condition? Does your pride know no limits, elf?”_

“What can I say, sometimes this whole surviving the apocalypse thing gets into your head,” he shrugged. “I still have a room full of plants that I need to move.”

On the other side of the line, the sound of feathers shifting came as the Raven Queen considered Taako’s condition. _“You still think you can carry on with this?”_

“I know I will.”

More silence followed after Taako finished saying that. He still wasn’t looking at Kravitz, so he rested his sight on a faraway point in the front wall.

Finally, the Raven Queen spoke. _“The other gods won’t be as lenient as me.”_

“Not as much as sending a bunch of birds after me? That’s a pretty low bar.”

_“Your courage is admirable, if not downright foolish.”_

A rift opened in the room, and the crows left through it, all still cawing. Kravitz knew they meant only one word: _Hopeless._

_“I’ll leave you to deal with them, then.”_

Taako nodded, “Then this is goodbye for the both of us. Nice to finally meet you!”

She didn’t acknowledge him. _“Goodbye, Kravitz.”_

Kravitz really didn’t know what else to say, so he just nodded. “Goodbye, my goddess.”

And the connection finally got cut. For a tense moment, the only noise in the room was that of the waves crashing outside. Not even the plants dared break the silence.

Taako whistled. “Well, that’s another mystery solved.”

Kravitz turned at him now. Taako was picking up one of the pots and walking with it to the rift. “Taako, I’m sor-”

“Why?,” he shrugged, “Honestly, this whole niceness from you was starting to freak me out. Good thing it was just a ploy to get me killed faster, because gods forbid you actually cared about any of this.”

“It’s not like that,” Kravitz said, but was it true? Yes, he had invested himself in the saving of the garden now, he _wanted_ this to work as much as Taako did.

But Taako wasn’t listening, “No, I get it! You’ve made your intentions crystal clear since the day we met. And honestly, it’s pretty ironic you know! I would have done this long ago if you hadn’t shown up and forced me to keep going out of spite, so hey, thank you for that!”

Something clutched at Kravitz’s insides. “Taako…”

“This is getting ridiculous, raising the land, babysitting a fucking garden, cooking the same food everyday because there’s nothing else to do! I’ve just dragged this for too long.

“The only thing I’ve been certain about is that these plants will outlive me. Once that’s taken care of, Pan can look over them, I just want to make sure I don’t fuck up the last thing I can do for them. When I’m done with this, I’ll end this myself so the Bird Queen’s beautiful minion doesn’t have to break any more of her precious rules for me.”

“Taako, please listen to me-”

“No, Kravitz, you listen to me!” he snapped. The only thing louder and angrier than Taako’s voice was the wind outside, which was now making the broken wall shiver. Back inside the house they could hear the sound of windows and doors slamming against the walls. “If you don’t want to pretend anymore you can just leave, don’t close the rift on the way out.”

“I’m not pretending, I said I was going to help you!”

“Yes, Kravitz, you said a lot of things, but there’s also all the stuff you _didn’t_ say! Well, you can say it all now! You never believed I could do this! But it seems someone out there thinks there’s hope so here I am, stuck until something bigger and meaner comes and gets me! And I rather be doing something useful when that…”

Suddenly, Taako stopped talking, he looked down at his feet: they were soaking. “Oh, you gotta be shitting me. Again?!”

“The crack!” Kravitz pointed at the broken corner, where the cobweb trace of the impact fell apart as water flew violently through it. The hole in the wall was getting bigger.

Taako put the pot on top of a table and ran towards the wall. “Well, the pantheon knows how to be a pain in the ass!,” he peaced, desperately trying to come up with a solution. “Fuck, I can’t black out again. Fetch me something to cover this leak!”

Kravitz ran around the glass room uselessly until he gave up and rifted himself inside the house, where he fetched an armful of pillows and rugs, and back to the glass room. “Will these do?”

Taako saw what he got and laughed. “Fuck it, I guess! We don’t have any more options here.” He stuffed them as best as he could and walked away, watching how the flow of water dimmed, but it was still coming strong. “The rest of the crack is going to open in no time, we need to move!”

There was no way to make the migration faster. Kravitz carried as many as three pots at a time and Taako made other bunch levitate, but he would run out of spell slots eventually. The wind blew strong outside and even inside the glass room they could hear it.

“What the fuck is wrong with the weather!” Taako had to yell to make himself be heard above the sound of chaos, “This shit isn’t normal! It never got this intense back then!”

“It’s the end of the world, this _is_ the norm now.”

There was a cracking sound and pieces of the glass wall flew as the water pushed them inside.

“Fuck this shit!” Taako levitated another bunch of pots and ordered them to cross the rift, then he walked to the crack again. “SERIOUSLY? THIS IS GETTING RIDICULOUS!”

Kravitz emerged from the rift, “What happened?!”

“Look for yourself.”

Thanks to the shards that had fallen now they could see enough of outside, and not only the sea was getting closer: there on the horizon, a column of wind and water was getting near. This was no mere it storm, but a hurricane.

Taako was laughing desperately. “Well fuck me I guess, your boss wasn’t lying.”

Kravitz looked at Taako, then at the garden, then at the rift. “We won’t make it in time, we need to leave some-”

“I’m not leaving anyone behind, Kravitz!” Taako raised his hands and casted another spell on the cracked surface of the glass, which was only standing up thanks to the invincibility charm casted on it decades ago.

“Taako, you can’t fix it now!”

“I’m not, and you better get back on moving them to the other side! I’ll hold the wall!”

“What?!,” Kravitz ran towards Taako, but he was cut again.

“I SAID KEEP MOVING! I’m only doing this shit so you get the time to finish!”

“But they only listen to you!”

“Tough luck, you’ll have to make them see reason.”

“Taako-!”

“JUST GO!”

Kravitz went back reluctantly and took as many pots in his arms as he could again. The rift at the other side was getting crowded but he had no time to move around, just to place the pots on the ground and reopen the rift somewhere empty later.

And as if things weren’t hard enough, the plants were really scared now, and some refused to cooperate.

“Please stay down! You need to trust me, I’m taking you with your friends!”

But they wouldn’t listen to him.

“You see that?!,” he pointed at Taako again. “He sent me. I don’t want to do this either but we have no choice, you need to listen to me!”

But seeing Taako in danger only made them angrier. Many tried to reach toward him, some going as far as tumbling their pots down. Fuck it, Kravitz had to resort to more persuasive means. He changed into his astral form and let the fire in his eyes burst up.

The plants froze.

“That’s more like it. Now, you are going to come with me _peacefully_.”

That worked for a while, but they were still shaking and pulling at each other, now more than ever wanting to remain together.

Taako was having a hard time himself keeping the wall up. “How is it going?,” he grunted.

Kravitz did his best to carry them over as fast as he could. “Good enough, hang in there!”

“Hngh, hurry up!”

But is was hard moving around with water everywhere. It had raised past his ankles now, the current was strong enough to make every step a chore.

After what felt like an eternity to him —and he didn’t want to think how it was for Taako—, Kravitz managed to move almost every plant into the other side. All save for one.

It was an apple tree, left for the end as it would be the most difficult to carry around. But most important, this was a job for two.

“Taako, I need your help!”

“Sorry, I’m a bit tied up here!”

“I can’t move this on my own, it’s too heavy!

“If I let go now, that fucking storm is going to ravage everything that’s left.”

“There’s nothing _else_ left! If you can’t help me now then we’ll have to leave it behind!”

“FOR FUCK’S SAKE, KRAVITZ. JUST FIGURE SOMETHING, PLEASE.”

Kravitz wanted to scream. He looked at the tree again, assessing its weight and size. Maybe opening a rift under it? But the fall on the other side had to be at least as tall as the tree, and it was too likely it would tumble down, right on the other plants. If only he could make the fall less abrupt, but Kravitz didn’t know any levitation spells, and Taako was already out of juice…

… No, wait, he still had one thing!

Kravitz ran to him, “Give me your umbrella!”

“You know how to use it?”

“It’s got a feather fall spell, right?”

Taako opened his eyes wide. “Kravitz, you are a genius! Just take it, once it starts falling the spell will activate on its own.”

Kravitz took the umbrella to the tree, “Okay now, please don’t give me any more trouble.”

The tree didn’t do anything, so Kravitz took it as a good sign. He climbed over, turning back into his material form so no branches got stuck on his bones, and perched the umbrella on the highest branch, opening it. He got down and pushed and summoned his scythe, cutting a rift on the floor next to the big pot that held the tree, through which he could the see the floor of the plateau.

Summoning all his strength, he pushed the tree and watched it fall slowly through the rift. It worked! He closed the rift as soon as it was done, as now water was leaking through it. The level had reached his knees now.

“Taako, it’s done, get out of there!”

The elf turned around and a smile of relief finally appeared on his face. “Thank g-”

The wall crashed down.

“TAAKO!”

Kravitz didn’t think, he didn’t even notice when his legs started moving. The wave threatened to crash on top of him and he jumped straight into it, emerging seconds later and swimming as fast as he could to where Taako had been knocked out.

Kravitz avoided rubble and furniture getting thrown in his direction. Shards of the glass wall swam now in the water too and he didn’t even want to think about the possibility that one of them had struck on Taako.

A table knocked him by his side, putting him at the mercy of the current. When he emerged again, the room was gone. He had been pulled out by the retreat and now he had no idea where he stood anymore.

“Kravitz!,” came a voice from behind him.

Kravitz turned around and saw Taako desperately trying to stay afloat. He swam towards him, “MY HAND! GRAB IT!”

They reached for each other and the moment Kravitz grabbed onto him, he pulled Taako close and held him tight against his own body. “Don’t let go! I‘m going to open a rift!”

Taako shrieked, “Kravitz, watch out!”

The current crashed against the house again, pushing Kravitz against the broken wall. The sharp pain he felt was unbearable. It was inside, eating him from the waist to the rest of his body. He couldn’t take it, it was too much, it was…

Gone. Kravitz turned everything off. What use was pain for him anyway? He was already dead.

He materialized his scythe on his free arm and tore at the fabric of reality, but the current carried them away from it. _Shit!_

“Open it against the current!”

Right, that was it! This time he faced their destination, outside of the glass room, where a storm was waiting for them. In the dark, clouded sky, they could almost see the faces of all the deities that wanted them dead.

No, beyond that. Destroyed.

But Kravitz wasn’t afraid of any of that.

He stretched his arm, opened a rift in front of them, and the current did the rest.

* * *

 

_Taako kept surviving on his own._

_With time, more and more incidents like that came. Sometimes it would be another tempest, other times an earthquake followed by a wave._

_But the ones he hated the most were the peaceful risings. Those always came out of nowhere, good and bad weather alike. He could defend the house against them easily, but the incertitude of when they would come was slowly making him mad._

_He had resorted to vanishing the hall's entrance to the green room just so water didn’t come inside. The reinforcing spell was waterproof, so the only way for water to get inside was from inside the house. I never came to it, but Taako didn’t want to risk it._

_So he just kept rising the beach, time after time, turning it into a tiny island. One day he noticed he couldn't see land on the horizon, even though he still had a vague idea of where it was supposed to be. But he didn't mind, he got everything he needed at the moment with the garden. He would survive, but most important, the garden was still safe, and that was all that mattered to him, all his life was about._

_Until he gave up._

_Or, until one day, he saw a man drowning at the sea._

* * *

 

The sun was high on the sky at the other side of the rift. It was a beautiful day that time of the year. Or maybe it was just Pan’s blessing.

They were lying on the floor, surrounded by a pool of seawater. Taako laid on his back, looking at the sky with a goofy smile on his face. “Man, look at that sky. You know what? Blood orange is a pretty dope color.”

Kravitz wanted to say something too, but when he opened his mouth no words came out, only water.

“Shit! Kravitz, are you okay?,” Taako was crawling towards him. He felt the impulse to reach too, but for some reason he couldn’t move, something was keeping him down, and…

Oh, that wasn’t water. A black, thick liquid, rotting after centuries inside his dead body, dripped down his chin into the floor. He turned his head around and, ah, there it was. A shard of glass had impaled him on the back, probably cutting his spine too, which explained the lack of mobility down there.

Taako gestured at it frantically, “Oh my god, oh my god!”

“It’s-” he coughed a bit more of blood. Ugh, this was nasty. He cleaned his face with his sleeve. “It’s fine. Can you take it off?”

“FINE? _FINE?_ YOU GOT A BIGASS SHARD OF REINFORCED GLASS CUTTING YOU IN HALF, FOR FUCK’S SAKE.”

“Taako, I’m dead.”

“… Oh, right.”

The process of extracting a massive glass shard from one’s body was less terrible if the one being pierced couldn’t feel pain, or have any real organs to lose in the process. Poor Taako, on the other hand, grimaced all the way until it was out. “Ew, fuck, oh god, ew, holy fucking shit, ugh I’m going to puke IS THAT A BONE.”

“You’ve seen my bones before.”

“THIS IS OBVIOUSLY DIFFERENT YOU ASSHOLE.”

Aaaaand the shard was off. Taako dropped it next to Kravitz’s body and then crawled away from it as much as he could without actually leaving Kravitz’s side. He sat down and grabbed his knees, still a little shocked about everything. “ _God._ ”

“Ah, can I ask you one last favor?”

Taako glared at him.

“It’s nothing! Just, turn me around so I can face up, please, I feel tired and I’d rather not rest my face in a pool of my own blood.”

Taako made another grimace, but he still helped. Kravitz was laying on his back now, feeling immensely tired. But he could see the sky too, and he had to admit, it was pretty darn beautiful.

“Why did you do this?,” asked Taako. He was looking down at him.

“It’s more comfortable this way.”

“I’m not talking about- Gods, Krav, you seriously don’t realize what you just did?”

Kravitz looked up at Taako, even if it was a little hard to do so from his position. “What? Wait, did I mess up the plants?” He tried to get a view of the rest of the plateau, but he could barely hold his own weight. Right now the only part of his own body he could both feel and control normally was his face.

“No, Kravitz! For fuck’s sake, man, you saved my life!”

Kravitz looked up at Taako again, and…

Oh.

“I guess… I did just do that.”

A grunt, and Taako disappeared from his sight. He was lying down, probably, and by the muffled sound of his voice Kravitz could tell he was covering his face with his hands. “I don’t get it! Fuck, I thought I did, after that conversation you had with the Bird Queen-”

“It’s the Raven Queen.”

“- I was supposed to die back then!” Taako appeared on his line of sight again. “Kravitz, I thought I was going to die when the wall crashed over me! I knew that was going to be it, the only thing I wanted was for the garden to make it here safely and after that we would both get what we wanted. And then you went and _sacrificed_ yourself for me!”

Kravitz’s head was swirling. He wanted to make sense of this too, really. “It’s not really a sacrifice if I can’t die.”

Taako grunted. “Right, but what about the rules? Doesn’t your entire existence revolve around people dying?”

This he could answer easily. “The laws of Death are strict in regards to bringing new souls into the realm of the Raven Queen, but there is nothing that forbids a reaper from interfering with the souls of the living as long as they stay alive.”

Taako didn’t know what to say to that, so instead he chose to ignore it and go straight to the point. “Why did you save me?”

There was an echo on his mind, words that he had repeated to himself countless times in the past months.

“Istus… she told me I had to help you twice, that for one you would ask me, and the second one would be up to me to know. She said it would be the right thing to do.”

“So… you did this because of Istus, then?”

But… it wasn’t that, either.

Kravitz looked up at Taako, with his messed up hair and clothes, still dripping seawater, and he…

He was being ridiculous. Why, it was way simpler than any of that.

“I… I wasn’t thinking, back then. The wall crashed over you and I was already running. I didn’t think about the plants, or Istus’ mission, or even remembered that you were supposed to die,” it was hard to look at Taako like this, with the sun behind him. It hurt his eyes, but Kravitz couldn’t avert his gaze, he didn’t want to stop looking at him.

Taako was shaking. “Kravitz…?”

“I didn’t want this to end. Taako, I love you-”

Taako was already kissing him. His face was warm, and Kravitz only had enough strength in him to kiss back and reach up to him with his hands.

But it was enough. After all their efforts, the garden was safe, Taako was alive, and he couldn’t stop laughing on Kravitz’s lips.

It was more than enough.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll wrap up what's left in the epilogue, which should be up this weekend.  
> Meanwhile, [here's a song I've been listening on repeat these months to keep me inspired.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=62kir745DKU)


	11. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> At the end of the world, two men sat together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HERE BE SMUT. I labeled it in case you wanted to skip it so when you reach the **(*)** just Ctrl+F " **(**)** " and you'll be on the next scene.  
> (Also, I should clarify that Griffin picked gods from DIFFERENT EDITIONS. So dont ask me about the pantheon. Please)

Taako wiped the sweat on his forehead, admiring his hard work. It took two days, and only because Kravitz had lend a hand, but now the plants had finally been replanted.

In front of him laid the first garden of the new world.

Though he probably didn’t know about that just yet, and not that he cared. All that mattered now was they were safe, and in a place they could truly belong together.

“Home, sweet home. Hey, now you can stretch all you want.”

Prompted by that, six different plants reached for Taako and pulled him into a hug. He sighed in mock exasperation, but still patted them back.

A rift opened at the plateau from which Kravitz walked out. Patching himself up had taken just a day —talk about unnecessary drama— and even his suit was back to his usual fanciness. That was so unfair, Taako was still wearing yesterday’s clothes, dry but dirty from all the sand. “How did it go? Find something useful?”

Kravitz considered his answer. “I guess?”

“Is that a no?”

“I’m really not sure.” He looked back at the rift, “Why don’t you come in and see for yourself?”

“Wait, as in, me going there?”

Kravitz just pointed at the rift. “After you.”

Taako approached carefully, one leg at a time, until his foot touched solid ground. No water! He finished stepping inside and was soon followed by Kravitz, and now the two of them stood in the middle of the glass room.

Or, well, whatever was left of it.

Taako whistled. “Oh, man…”

“I’m sorry, everything is-”

“Still above sea level! We did it!” Taako ran to the hall before Kravitz even noticed. “Clean clothes, here I go!”

Well, that sure felt like something Taako would do. Kravitz finally followed him, although he stayed on the first floor, which was, like one would expect after last night’s storm, pretty messed up. For starters, most decorations and small objects had been carried away by the wave, from lamps and expensive looking vases to books, even the number of wooden ducks around had halved. Pity, they were charming. The wallpaper was also beyond repair now, and no amount of furniture relocation would cover that.

“There, fresh and pretty,” came Taako’s voice from upstairs. Now that he had found clean clothes and magically fixed his hair and makeup, he was back on his game. “How do I look?”

“Like you always do.”

“Pff, can you put a bit more effort on that?”

“I meant it as a compliment, you always look astonishing.”

Taako blushed and played with one of his locks like a schoolgirl. “Well, you are not wrong about that. Whatcha lookin at?”

Kravitz shrugged and pointed at… everything. “Just this big fucking mess? I tried seeing if there was anything left of use, but the wave either took everything with it or ruined it forever. Except for the rustic wooden furniture. Man, these really _are_ good.”

“Eh, it was just useless shit. Expensive, useless shit. My friend is probably turning in his grave, but I already saved his green house of horrors, so I don’t think he can hold it against me. Besides, I already keep all the important shit upstairs because of the floods, and everything seemed fine up there.”

“There’s one thing you keep down here that you can’t take to your room, though.”

Taako eyed him curiously, and then… it hit him.

“Ah, the kitchen.”

Kravitz nodded. The kitchen, oh man…

Taako wasn’t as optimistic when he finally stepped inside. Unfortunately, the damage done here was enough to turn the installations useless. The stove and sink were ruined, as well as the tiny cooler where Taako used to keep his last reserves of food.

“I mean, it’s not like we ran out of food,” he said, trying to keep up face despite how much it crushed him to see the state of his kitchen. “Besides, I kept most of my cooking implements at the top cabinets, see? They are still intact.”

Without knowing what to say, Kravitz just opted on putting a hand over Taako’s shoulder.

He smiled at Kravitz and rested his head on his chest, sighing. “It’s fine.”

“Are you sure?”

Taako leaned forward and gave him a little peck. “I’m sure, Krav. Wanna help me take what little I have left upstairs? Don’t wanna lose anything else if the gods decide they still hate me.”

* * *

 

After putting the last of the remaining wooden ducks in a pile on the floor —there were a lot of these around— Kravitz went to check on Taako, who was arranging stuff around his own room. “Do you need anything else?”

Startled, he turned around and smiled at Kravitz, “Ah, I’m done, actually,” he was standing in front of his dressing table, staring at his reflection on the mirror… no, not quite. He was just looking at something in front of it, a white feather taped to one of the sides.

Kravitz rushed inside the room, “Can I see that?”

Taako looked back at the feather tapped to the mirror. “Does this… remind you of something?”

“I think it does. May I?”

Taako nodded, so he untapped the feather and inspected it. It looked almost white, but up close you noticed the strands were actually silver. But most important, it was a crow feather, Kravitz would know since he himself carried a handful of those at all times. “Where did you get this?”

Taako took the feather from Kravitz’s hold and looked at it, thoughtful. “It was part of Lup’s stuff. She used to keep on a cup in her study.” Taako shrugged, “I didn’t think much of it, just that it was pretty, so I brought it with me when I moved in.” He looked up at Kravitz again, “It was important, wasn’t it?”

Kravitz nodded. “I believe your sister might have met with Istus at some point.”

Taako hummed, turning the feather by the quill. Under the sunlight, it seemed to shine with a special glow. Something he hadn’t seen on any other bird before. “It makes sense, you know? If someone was supposed to save the world from ending, it should have been her.”

Kravitz didn’t know what to say. On one hand, he wanted to tell Taako he had done an amazing job on his own. However, Lup, his sister, had died because of this.

But Taako didn’t seem too down about it. “I used to think she was looking over me. Before, you know, talking to Pan and all that. So, that’s probably not true, right?” Taako looked up at Kravitz, “Can they even see us?”

By they, he meant the souls of the dead, those who had already crossed to the other side. “I… really don’t know. Whatever lies beyond the veil is a mystery even for me.”

“Right. You’ve never passed on and all that,” Taako turned his back to the table and leaned on it. “But even if that isn’t the case, I don’t think she would’ve left without making sure I had the most important thing to survive the apocalypse.”

“What is it?”

“You.”

Kravitz raised an eyebrow. “Me?”

“You said Istus sent you, right? Who do you think asked her to get the handsome grim reaper to join my world saving mission? She knew my taste in men, after all.”

Kravitz chuckled, “Are you insinuating your late sister _and_ Istus set us up?”

“And didn’t that work out just fine?”

Just after Taako said that Kravitz realized, they were standing really close now. He did invade Taako’s personal space to retrieve that feather, too busy taking in the implications of it to notice what he had done. But Taako hadn’t missed it, as positioned himself in a way that had him practically at Kravitz’s disposition on the table. But he didn’t do anything yet, he was waiting for Kravitz to make the first move.

Kravitz’s first instinct was to back down, but why? He had no reason to do that anymore.

This time he would finally let himself get carried away.

**(*)**

Kravitz kissed him, waiting for Taako to answer —eager, as much as he was— before holding him by the hips and pushing him up the table, which in turn made Taako gasp, and Kravitz took the chance to deepen the kiss, letting go of whatever was left of his moderation.

Taako sighed into it as he took the back of Kravitz’s head and dug into his hair. Meanwhile, his left hand roamed free on Kravitz’s chest, undoing the buttons on his jacket and shirt. When he was halfway done, Taako parted from the kiss.

Kravitz fell forward as he tried to follow Taako’s lips back, wondering why he had stopped so suddenly, when Taako’s head ducked and his lips met Kravitz’s now exposed neck instead. Kravitz held in his breath, then ceased all air intake altogether.

Taako noticed this and immediately stopped what he was doing. “Hey,” he was looking straight into Kravitz’s eyes, and while his were glossy and dilated, he seemed concerned. “You don’t need to do that.”

“Do what?”

“This,” and Taako put his hands at the sides of Kravitz's ribs, which were still now. “Not breathing. You always do that when you don’t want me to know you are heated up over something.”

Kravitz stared at Taako in horror, more embarrassed than he had ever been in his entire existence. He covered his face with one hand and groaned. “Oh my goddess, you knew.”

“It’s kinda hard to ignore,” Taako snorted. “Normal people can’t do that without suffocating, you know? It’s kind of creepy,” Taako was just delighted by the sheer embarrassment in Kravitz's face, he thought it was endearing. He tried removing the hand that was covering his face, to which Kravitz didn’t put much resistance. “Hey, don’t hide yourself from me, ‘kay? I want to see- to _hear_ you now,” Taako leaned on Kravitz's neck again and kissed him softly just under the ear. Kravitz immediately relaxed back into his hold and Taako smiled, happy with his work. “How am I supposed to know you are enjoying yourself then?”

Slowly, Kravitz regained his breathing until it was set to a normal pace. Air filled his lungs and then quickly left as he sighed again under Taako’s lips. “I guess you are right about that.”

“I’m right about everything,” he grabbed Kravitz’s face again and gave him a quick peck. “For example, now I say we should move to my bed over there, are you going to argue with that?”

Kravitz smiled. “How could I?”

He scooped Taako up by his thighs. Taako yelped of surprise, then eased into a dorky laugh, clinging with his legs to Kravitz’s back for the short trip to the bed. Kravitz let him down carefully, and after taking off his shoes he promptly got on top of him, back to kissing him.

Taako’s hand roamed all over Kravitz’s body, taking the time to appreciate those arms of his. “My, you are so strong.”

“You aren’t very heavy anyway,” on his part, Kravitz worked his best to unbutton Taako’s shirt. So much for changing back. A couple buttons down and Kravitz couldn’t stop himself from kissing his exposed skin, starting at the freckles sprinkled on his shoulders and going down his collarbones, then to his chest, and finally stopping at one nipple, nibbling at it with just enough force to make Taako gasp.

“Oh, _fuck_ , you are eager, aren’t you?”

“That’s rich coming from you,” Kravitz quickly went up to Taako’s neck, kissing and biting at it while Taako just kept on making those delicious noises, “you’ve done nothing but come at me since we met.”

“Pf, yeah, you gotta canalize the thirst somehow. Getting your stoic ass flustered is one of the things that have kept me going on those cold, lonely nights.” Kravitz wanted to retort that he _rarely_ got flustered, but Taako pulled him closer and raised one of his knees just enough to rub at his crotch, which, Kravitz noticed with an undignified gasp, was already half-hard. “But you? You’ve been repressed for so long you can barely get a grip on yourself now.”

That was… true, there was no way around it. He had spent months shutting that little voice inside telling him to go for it, and now that he had finally listened, Kravitz felt like he couldn’t go back. He wanted this so much, he wanted _Taako_. Kravitz was back at kissing him and Taako smiled against his lips, smugly.

“I’m glad —ah, hah— we can finally come to an agreement on this.”

“Me too,” he mumbled, and went back to his task of stripping Taako of everything he was wearing. Taako took the time to do so with him too, until both of them were bare-chested. Kravitz leaned down again and remade his trail down Taako’s front, all while Taako dug in his hair with one hand and untied it. Kravitz’s beads fell over his shoulders and the cold touch of gold against skin would have startled Taako hadn’t he been used to Kravitz’s cold lips by now.

Kravitz had made it halfway down, around Taako’s waist, when he was pulled up by a pair of slender arms. “Wait, wait, get off me for a second?”

Kravitz did so immediately. “Of course! I’m sorry, please tell me if you don’t like-”

Taako pushed Kravitz on his side and climbed on top of him, pinning his shoulders down and taking Kravitz’s lips while he grinded on him. The reaction he got out of that was worth everything, now that he was finally able to take on that so much needed friction between their erections.

“I was— ah, _yes_ — I-I was going to take care of that—”

“We’ll have time for teasing another day, I want you _now_.”

And who was Kravitz to say no to that? His hands were back on Taako’s hips and he pulled the hem of his leggins down with a swift movement. He might have been in a rush too, but he couldn’t help but take a moment to look at Taako in front of him now, the way his damp skin shined when it was hit by the light from the window. He only had trousers on and socks. Kravitz wanted to kiss him all over, from the freckles on his arms to the ones on his hips, take the time to give his much needed cock the attention it deserved.

But Taako was already getting rid of Kravitz’s pants. He didn’t miss the way Kravitz’s breath was knocked out of him —not completely this time, though— and he leaned forward to talk directly over Kravitz’s ear. “I’ll let you get sappy next time, okay?”

Kravitz took his face in one hand and kissed him on the forehead. “It’s fine, I just want to make sure I don’t miss anything.”

“I could say the same,” Taako touched feathers that were poking from Kravitz’s side. On his back, he had the marking of the Raven Queen, a pair of black raven wings, which leaked ink through his sides. “A tattoo? God, this is so _hot_. I should’ve gotten you naked sooner, but you were so adamant on changing clothes magically all the time.”

“It’s a small prerogative we astral beings have.”

Taako cocked his head to the side. “Why didn’t you just vanish your clothes just now, then?”

Oh. Good question. “Heat of the moment?”

“That’s an understatement, babe,” Taako chuckled and cupped Kravitz’s hard cock in one hand now that it was only covered by his trousers. Kravitz threw his head back and moaned loudly, rocking his hips instinctively towards Taako’s touch. “Besides, dressing down is part of the fun.”

“How come,” Kravitz gasped, “you get to do that but I can’t?”

Taako squeezed Kravitz lightly, earning another moan from him. “I’m just testing the waters here, I’m the one who’s going to take you in after all.”

Kravitz breathed out a small laugh. “That’s fair.”

Taako adjusted his position on top of Kravitz and and whispered something into his right hand, which was soon covered in a slick substance, and Taako moved it behind his back. All of this without breaking eye contact with Kravitz. A couple seconds later, he was moaning on his own, as he fingered himself with his slick hand.

A pulse ran through Kravitz’s spine, from the back of his head to his now aching cock. “That’s-,” he stuttered, “it seems like an useful spell.”

Taako moved his hand in a way that made him shut his eyes closed for a second and moan louder. When he opened them again, his eyes was glassy, still staring right at Kravitz. “Hah, right? Told you I know how to take care of myself.” A second, then a third finger later, Taako could take himself to the edge right then and there, see what it did to Kravitz. But he contained himself. Something better was coming, and he was stretched enough now. He finally removed his hand and almost tumbled down when the feeling of emptiness took over him. Kravitz noticed in time to hold him, and Taako smiled sheepishly. “Thanks, what a gentleman. Are you going to fuck me now, honey?”

Kravitz finally got rid of his trousers and Taako did the same with his, then held onto Kravitz's arms and lowered himself on Kravitz’s cock. Kravitz threw his head back and breathed out roughly as he felt Taako lowering himself, until he was all the way down. He then promptly began rocking up and down, making Kravitz gasp again.

“Fuck, _Taako_.”

“Yes, babe, _finally_.”

The pace was fast, and it was so good, but Kravitz knew it wouldn’t last very long if they kept it like this. He tried to restrict Taako’s movement with his arms, holding him tighter, which earned a hiss from Taako.

“Shit, Krav, don’t stop now.”

“I’m not,” holding Taako firmly, he set a calmer pace for both of them to follow. “I just want to take it slow.”

“Are you fucking shitting me now? Krav, I love you so much, but if you don’t pick up the pace I swear I’m gonna- _AHFUCKYES_.”

Kravitz had just thrusted hard, and thanks to his hold on Taako he could have a little more control of where and how he did it. He leaned up just a little, to make sure Taako was looking at him when he opened his eyes again. “Now who’s the eager one?,” he kissed Taako, quick but hungry, summoning all of his willpower to take back and whisper, “Isn’t this better?”

Taako huffed, both in pleasure and mild annoyance. “Whatever. Just keep going.”

Kravitz obliged, following his on pace for a while. Now that he had the time to put more strength into his trusts Taako was soon mewling on top of him, saying his name, or rather that ridiculously cute nickname he had given him, like a chant. “ _Krav, Krav, oh Krav._ ” And Kravitz himself couldn’t help but call his name too, tenderly at first, and then more erratic, stuttering.

But Taako was growing desperate on top of him, and Kravitz could feel it in the way his own rocking up and down was getting a bit too much to control. Or maybe he himself was starting to lose control on his hold.

“I need it, please, _Kravitz_.”

Yeah fuck all that control bullshit. Kravitz held Taako up and with a movement that tried to be swift but ended up being abrupt and messy, he got himself on top of Taako, now rocking full force onto him, faster and rougher.

“Oh yes yes _yes Krav_ ,” Taako reached down to take care of his own needy erection but Kravitz grabbed his hand and placed them on top of Taako’s head on the bed. “Shit, ah, let me-”

Then Kravitz took a hold of Taako’s cock and all coherency left him.

By the time he had finally let go of his hold on Taako’s hands and grabbed his hips, his rhythm had become erratic. Taako grabbed onto his face, pulling Kravitz into a kiss while the last of him finally gave up to the pleasure and he came, moaning on Kravitz’s mouth. With that, it didn’t take long for Kravitz to follow with Taako’s name on his lips.

They stayed like that while Taako caught his breath. He didn’t untangle his legs right away, and Kravitz took the chance to kiss every inch of his neck and shoulders. “Ha ha, ah, that tickles.”

When they finally broke apart, Taako climbed out of bed and grabbed a handful of tissues from the desk to wipe himself off. “You need one too or are you going to banish my cum to the shadow realm.”

Kravitz laughed. “A tissue is fine,” he accepted Taako’s offering and got himself to work, “although, maybe we could clean the rest with a shower-?”

Taako threw himself back on the bed, taking Kravitz down with him. “Too tired,” he mumbled on Kravitz’s shoulder, and fell asleep.

Oh. Wasn’t that bad? He tried to shake him off but Taako was completely out. Well, the least he could do was stay there with Taako in case anything bad happened when he woke up.

Kravitz had to rift the tissue to the trash can as his current position didn’t allow him much movement, but once he was done, he eased into Taako’s hold and made himself comfortable. They were going to be like that for a while.

**(**)**

* * *

 

A murder of crows cawed, their voices echoing in the chambers of a castle far away, long beyond the reach of any creature. To untrained ears, the sound would be senseless, annoying even. But from the Raven Queen they came, and of hers was their language. The meaning of their message was clear to her.

_She’s here!_

And so she was, walking through the entrance to the throne room, Istus. Goddess of Fate, patron of heroes, rebel to the pantheon. Her best friend.

“So you’ve finally deigned to show yourself.”

“Don’t say that, my dear. You know I love to pay you a visit. But alas, I’ve had my hands full.”

The Raven Queen stood up and walked to meet her midway to the throne. “You have a lot of explaining to do, you know? Our siblings are outraged.”

“I wouldn’t expect less from them. To be fair, we are a temperamental family.”

Cackles filled the throne room, and they were so contagious the murder of crowds couldn’t help but join in too. “Welcome back, you old witch. After you?,” the Raven Queen extended one of her wings, which Istus accepted gladly.

“It’ll be my pleasure.”

The pantheon was full, like it rarely was back in the days were life roamed across Faerûn’s surface. Their chattering and murmurs, filling the room with chaos, came to a stop the moment they stepped inside.

And then, it came back, lower in volume but with an increased intensity, all of it focused on Istus.

“My dear,” she said to the Raven Queen, “you might want to sit down for this.”

But the Raven Queen remained by her side. “Whether I like it or not, my servant chose to be part of this,” she eyed Istus with an accusing look, but it held no real malice. “Who will defend him if not me?”

“I could take care of that just fine.”

“Thank you, but I am his goddess. It is my duty to stand up for him.”

Istus nodded, and the two of them took a sit at the center. “Shall we begin, then?”

“Aren’t you forgetting someone?,” Malar, the god of Hunt, asked mockingly, like he didn’t know why Pan was late.

“Pan is taking care of his legacy,” said Istus matter of factly, which led to a roar of yelling and complaints from the rest of the pantheon. “But we can start without him. I’ve always known it was going to be like this.”

“You’ve always known… the nerve of you, Istus!,” said Loviatar, goddess of Pain, harshly. ”You dared keep this plan of yours a secret from all of us for centuries! We all agreed to this, and thanks to you not only our plan of giving the mortals a peaceful ending was almost thwarted by one meddling elf, but now those who remain will have to endure the aftermath for centuries, if not millennia.”

“No, Loviatar, _this_ is life!,” Istus stood up, and when she talked, she made sure to look at each one of the other gods in the eye, like she was talking _personally_ to all of them. And in a way, she was, because this concerned everyone. “Don’t you see? There is still hope for our beloved world, the one we created so long ago. If even the slightest trace of life can survive the worst of all natural disasters, now everything that comes after will be stronger! The worst is already over! Our incomplete, unstable world has finally released all the energy we’ve tried to contain for ages. What comes after is a second chance not only to them, but to _us_.”

The deities considered Istus’ words. _Could it be? Was it really possible?_ But that moment of reflexion didn’t last.

“What makes you think it’s worth it again?” Said Loviatar again. “How can we know it won’t build up enough energy and destroy everything a second time?”

“We don’t,” came another voice from the entrance, “but when have we ever known when it comes to our creations? Personally, I find that unpredictability of theirs endearing.”

Everyone started talking at the same time.

“Pan!”

“Where have you been?!”

“What did you think you were doing?!”

“This is preposterous!”

Istus looked back at the rest and raised her arms to ask for a moment of quiet. Those who didn’t follow at first, she stared until they complied. The Raven Queen had to stifle a squawk. “Pan, my dear, you are one for dramatic entrances.”

“It’s all about timing,” he said, finally walking to his assigned seat between Istus and the Raven Queen. However, he did not sit up immediately. “Brothers, sisters, siblings of mine, I understand you are tired. We watched this world grow into what it has become today, unable to do anything to save it from the powers we ourselves bestowed upon it. I, more than any of us, know about this. I’m sure you’ll agree.

“And it’s true, this might not be the last time we have to watch our children die, hearing them calling our name hopelessly while we can do nothing to spare their suffering but make it faster.”

“My people died with honor!” said Torm, god of Courage.

“I didn’t mind the souls either,” chimed in the Raven Queen.

Pan chuckled. “Well, I guess some of us will agree that was an awful experience, which I gather is why you’d rather not go through this again. Isn’t that right, Loviatar?”

Loviatar crossed her arms and averted her sight.

“But even so, I still believe life is a cause worth fighting for. This cycle is already over, there’s no use in dwelling on that anymore. But maybe next time we can find another way, help as many of them as we can. The survivor didn’t last so long because he had me, but because he refused to give up. Many times he would have perished under the strength of the world had he not have the resolution to fight back,” he exchanged looks with the Raven Queen, who now looked solemnly at him. “Or, when that failed, someone else to share the pain.”

Loviatar’s expression didn’t falter, but her hands, which had been holding tightly at her own arms, seemed to loosen its hold, if only for a second.

“What if we give them that next time? The knowledge of what is to come, to prepare; the company of each other, to endure; the _choice_ to keep living?

“It will be violent, as much as this was. But if there’s something mortals love, is danger, and conquering it.”

The room fell silent before him, as everyone took in his words.

“There won’t be anyone around for awhile after he dies, though,” said Malar, “only your garden.”

Pan smiled. “That’s more than enough to start anew. How long did it take last time? Two, three eons?”

“It was around two and three quarters, if memory doesn’t fail me.”

“Thank you, Istus.” Pan faced the rest of the pantheon again. “What do you say, my fellas? Are you really ready to give up just yet?”

And then, in the celestial plane, something wonderful happened.

The Gods believed again.

“What the hell, you are right!” Torm stood up and slammed his desk with his gauntlet. “I miss watching those little guys taking each other’s eyes over for Glory and Honor!”

“To think I’ll hear another of their songs…” Milil, the god of poetry and song, stood up too. “No, that’s unthinkable. I’ll make sure our new creations find the joy of Music.”

The Raven Queen sighed. “Oh well, I was looking for an excuse to make expansions anyway. Just make sure no one new dies in the next century or two.”

Istus was truly, honestly happy, like she hadn’t been in a very long time. To think of all the kinds of patterns she’ll get to knit. The possibilities were endless now, and she could almost see them, clear as day, in front of her.

She turned to Pan, who was leaving now. “Thank you for making space for us in your busy schedule.”

“I can be a bit of a workaholic, but what can I say? I love my job.” Pan waved at her, and when he crossed the entrance, his form disappeared into a pile of leaves and pollen, which were then taken away by an inexistent wind.

Istus, on her part, had places to be too. All this excitement could make someone forget the smaller things, but not her, for even the smallest of souls was precious to her.

And she had good news to deliver.

* * *

 

Consciousness came to Taako slowly. First, his ears caught the sound of the sea crashing, not too violently nor softly, against the shore. Then it was the smell of seawater and salt, and something else he couldn’t quite place just yet, but it was nice. It was when he became aware of the touch of cold hands against his back that the haziness started to dissipate and, finally, he opened his eyes.

Kravitz was smiling at him. “How do you feel?”

He didn’t answer right away. Taako tried to stretch his legs and just then noticed they were tangled up with Kravitz too, this was a fun waking up so far. “Do you mean if it hurts? Cuz I can’t feel anything right now, to be honest. I’ll probably find out when I get up.”

“Ah, I mean, I wasn’t talking about that, but _now_ I’m worried.”

“Psh, ’sfine. I know how to deal with that. Besides, it was worth it.”

Kravitz laughed nervously. “If you say so…” He cleared his throat, “But really, you actually fell asleep for a couple hours, is everything okay?”

Taako breathed in and out deeply, to make oxygen circulate on his brain. “It’s a bit hazy, but… my head doesn’t hurt, which is already better than expected. It’s not like I had to use my brain to ride you.”

“I’m pretty sure none of us were really thinking at that point.”

Taako snorted. “Yeah,” he breathed in again. “But boy, I really should have taken that shower before, I feel nasty,” he tried to sit up, but the dizziness got him, tumbling him down back on the bed. “Oh MAN that was awful, ugh.”

Kravitz repositioned himself so he was holding Taako’s head. “Take it slow, you don’t have to get up right now.”

“But I’m gross,” he whined, “and you have to deal with that too.”

“I really don’t mind,” Kravitz said, and he found he truly meant it. “I could stay here with you forever.”

Taako turned his head and stared at Kravitz smiling sweetly at him, and something inside tugged at him, like pain. “Krav, you know I lied to you.”

Kravitz looked at him, confused. “Is this about the garden? I don’t care about that anymore. Hell, it should be me who should apologize for-”

“No, Krav. It’s fine now, really.” Taako sighed. “And… I’m not talking about that.” There really wasn’t an easy way to admit it. “Back when we met, all that talk about wanting to live forever and shit… you know that’s some bullshit I said only to spite you.”

Kravitz felt as if his heart shrunk. He held Taako closer. “I’m sorry.”

“Nah, don’t be. I mean, you did me a favour after all,” he laughed, but it still felt weird to acknowledge all of this. “You told me yesterday that Istus had predicted you would save my life.”

“Yes, but I wasn’t thinking of that when I did it. I acted on my own.”

“Of course you did, you silly. Istus’ mission was about saving the garden, why would she ask you to get between me and a bunch of killer glass shards after the plants were already safe? Didn’t she, like, literally promise I’ll die after we finished?”

Kravitz… hadn’t thought about that. But it had made sense when he thought about it yesterday, what else could she have meant?

“I think,” Taako explained then, “that you got it mixed up. She never said in which order you had to help me, right?”

“Taako, I’m sorry, but I think I’d remember _saving your life_.”

Taako smiled. “But that’s what you’ve been doing all this time.”

Yesterday, at the storm.

Weeks ago, holding Taako’s hand as they walked around the volcano.

After the glass broke, making sure that Taako took care of himself.

Even way before that, when he came back after breaking into the glass room.

All of those times, he didn’t _have_ to be there with him.

But Kravitz had chosen to stay.

“Listen, I know this has been hard on you too. I’ve lived a good life, reached the peak of my career both as a chef and a wizard decades ago. I even got to bone _the_ Grim Reaper.”

Kravitz groaned at the pun, but he figured he could let it slide this once. “Just, go on.”

Taako smiled, he knew exactly what he had done. “But, yeah, what I mean is… Now that the garden is safe I don’t really have a reason to stay around any longer. If you tell me you want to go now, I’ll do it. We can go together.”

Kravitz thought, really thought about it.

Six months ago, the end of the world meant his job would finally be done, that he could rest for eternity on the other side, after centuries of loyal service to the Raven Queen. But right now? The end of the world… would be just that, the end. No more races around the beach, no more trips to dying volcanoes, no more detective novels, no more food. No more of these things people did to pass the time.

Just no more living.

“I want to stay,” he said, low at first, and then with conviction. “I want to stay here.”

Taako smiled brightly. “Really?”

“Yeah! There’s so much I still want to do.” Kravitz kissed Taako on the forehead, “We still haven’t found my favourite meal.”

“It’s gonna be harder now that I don’t have a kitchen… just kidding, I’m awesome. I’ll get around it!”

“I know you will! You should teach me how to cook one day, so I can stop worrying about burning everything next time I want to do something nice for you.”

“Only if you teach me how to play an instrument.”

“Sure, but, where are we going to find one?”

“I’m pretty sure I could make a violin with some rocks and thread.”

“That’s… not how you make a violin.”

“I’ll call it the _taakolin_. And we still haven’t completed our volcano tour.”

“Oh, right. But I forgot to mention, most of those are underwater.”

“Pf, nothing a bubble spell can’t fix. And what about…?”

The two of them talked and talked, coming up with a thousand ideas to pass the time.

Because they weren’t alone anymore, and the world was theirs.

Fin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's a wrap!
> 
> I honestly thought this story would be way shorter, less plotty and more comedy than nothing. But I'm happy with the way it developed! I do worry it took too long to finish, though; I lowkey betted a friend who just got into TAZ that I would finish before she caught up to the Balance finale.
> 
> I lost.
> 
> (hola gaby)
> 
> ANYWAY! I'd love to write something like this again! I already have a couple ideas in the back of my head that are just waiting to be written, but for now I think I'll take a rest... and read all the wonderful fics out there that I didn't let myself even look at before I finished this. I'M FREE.
> 
> Thank you for reading, specially those of you who took the time to leave comments, even on every chapter. I really cannot describe the ammount of happiness reading you made me feel. Thank you so much. <3
> 
> As a parting gift, please picture Lup, centuries in the future, kicking Istus's proverbial door open as she yells, "YOU HOOKED MY BROTHER UP WITH THE GRIM REAPER?!"

**Author's Note:**

> If you want to request something, hmu on vampirekravitz @ tumblr


End file.
